Mean Twilight Sparkle quotes from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

Applejack

Uh, Gummy? You were supposed to bring Pinkie Pie. What happened?

[blinks slowly]

Is she still coming?

Twilight Sparkle

Fluttershy, can you understand what he's saying?

Fluttershy

I could... if he was talking.

Twilight Sparkle

Um, Maud? Can I ask you a question?

Maud Pie

[deadpan] You just did.

Applejack

Well, can I ask you a question?

Maud Pie

[deadpan] You just did.

Rainbow Dash

[groans] Fine! How about if I ask you a— Wait.

Oh, for goodness' sakes! Maud. All of your sister's things are gone. Explain.

Maud Pie

[deadpan] No, they're not. They're right here.

Fluttershy

Have you seen Pinkie Pie?

Maud Pie

Lots of times. I grew up with her.

Rainbow Dash

We respect your decision to move to Yakyakistan.

Twilight Sparkle

But we just wanted to remind you how much you mean to us, and how much we'd miss you if you decided to move here for—

Pinkie Pie

[despondent] Fine. I'll move back to Ponyville.

Rainbow Dash

Wow. That was a lot easier than I thought. We're awesome!

Twilight Sparkle

There's nothing better than a bond with another pony. You can share all kinds of things.

Starlight Glimmer

I think we'll stick to the stage magic for now.

Trixie

The Great and Powerful Trixie doesn't chant.

Rainbow Dash

It's like the harder I try to convince Scoot they're dangerous, the more she likes them!

Twilight Sparkle

You can't control her actions. Only yours. Teach her what's safe and what isn't, like a good role model. Then hope she makes the right decisions.

Twilight Sparkle

Our school is about finding your own special way to teach.

Applejack

And we can already tell you're a... smash with the class. [chuckles]

Twilight Sparkle

But maybe you could do a little less smashing in the classroom?

Rockhoof

I heard there's a statue spell that sends creatures into stone sleep. I want you to cast it. On me.

Twilight Sparkle

Why would you want to be turned into stone?

Rockhoof

Because I'm a relic of a bygone age. I belong in a museum. Safe. Preserved. Untouched. I don't belong in this time.

Twilight Sparkle

As the Princess of Friendship, I'd like to appoint you as Equestria's official keeper of tales!

Spike

Can you do that?

Twilight Sparkle

Eh. You are a living record of our history. Your stories can inspire and teach generations to come. If you're a statue, that's all lost.

Rockhoof

Will I ever really belong in your world?

Yona

Rockhoof Yona's friend. So Rockhoof belongs!

Twilight Sparkle

I can't believe you two are going on a friendship quest! This is amazing!

Applejack

What do you mean, Twilight? We've been on one together before.

Twilight Sparkle

Exactly! This is the first time the map has teamed up the same ponies for a second quest!

Fluttershy

The Peaks of... P-P-Peril?!

Applejack

Aw, it's just a name. It doesn't mean anythin'.

Fluttershy

Like how Cloudsdale is in the clouds and the Crystal Empire's made of crystal?

Applejack

Fair point.

Fluttershy

Maybe you should go instead of me, Twilight. [laughs nervously]

Twilight Sparkle

Sorry, Fluttershy. Flanks don't lie.

Twilight Sparkle

[witnesses an awkward moment] Oh! I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to barge in on you!

[grunts, sighs] Ah, don't worry about it. Mi castle es su castle.

Twilight Sparkle

It's nice to have someone show your Dragon culture, but are you sure that is what Sludge is doing?

Spike

What do you mean?

Twilight Sparkle

Well... taking over your room, making a mess of things, hoarding our possessions...

Spike

[blows raspberries] That is dragon culture, he's showing me how dragons claim territory for themselves.

Twilight Sparkle

You never acted like that.

Spike

That's because you raised me. Now I finally have a chance to see how I'm supposed to be.

Twilight Sparkle

[remembering spike as a hatchling] I know that I've have not been a perfect mother... I don't think you're supposed to be any different then who you are.

Spike

Maybe you just don't like that I have a real parent now.

Twilight Sparkle

[heart breaks] That's not true! I'm glad Sludge is here. I-I just wish he wasn't such a—

Spike

Dragon? [disgusted] Of all ponies, I can't believe you would have a problem with that.

Twilight Sparkle

I'm not surprised. There's no way a dragon like that was related to you. But if you still want to search for your real family, I'd understand if you spent more time in the Dragon Lands.

Spike

I don't think so. I already know who my real family is.

Twilight Sparkle

Aww! It's me, right?

Cozy Glow

I also color-coded your teaching schedule by friendship element and catalogued all the magical artifacts in the school. I hope that's okay.

Twilight Sparkle

Okay? Cozy, that's amazing! You're like my right-hoof pony! I don't know what I'd do without you.

Starlight Glimmer

I don't understand. It-It's like my spell stopped working. That's... never happened before.

Twilight Sparkle

I'm glad you're all okay, but I'm sure it's nothing to worry about, Starlight. Maybe you did your spell wrong.

Twilight Sparkle

I didn't drop that book.

Starlight Glimmer

[sarcastically] Maybe you did your spell wrong?

[sobbing] My magic is go-o-o-one! I even had to use my hooves to coif my tail!