Jackie quotes from Jackie Chan Adventures

Shendu's former palace is located near what is now Hong Kong. His vengeance is to begin at the toll of Midnight, ushering in the Chinese New Year.

Captain Black

Chinese New Year? That gives us only a couple of days!

Jackie

Less. Hong Kong is sixteen hours ahead of San Fransisco!

Captain Black

We'll take Section 13's fastest transport!

Finding the demon is not enough. One must have a means of... [reaching for a book he cannot reach] ...defeating it... [Tohru grabs the book and hands it to Uncle] Thank you. I will come with you!

I will come... [grunts in pain] ...too!

Jackie

Umm...that's okay.

Captain Black

Tohru, why help us?

I am told Section 13 serves donuts on Thursdays.

Jackie

Happy New Year Jade! Happy New Year Uncle! [Uncle cuffs Jackie.] Ow!

You destroyed the demon! Yin and yang! Now the world is out of balance! Nobody told you to destroy the demon!

Jackie

Jade did it.

Jade

Hmmph...

Now there is a void for a new, stronger evil to fill!

Jackie

You should visit your parents.

Jade

They might want me to stay with them.

Jackie

Would that be so awful?

Jade

Tch...For you. [starts crying]

Jackie

Waahhh!!!!!

Jade

Jackie! (gasp) Ahhhhh!!!!!

Jackie

Call Captain Black. Once I reach the top, you head for the bottom.

Jade

Awww.....

Jade

Well, what do we say we save some lives?

Jade

Jackie, I have to come with you. I'm an essential part of the J-Team! The cunning one?

Jackie

Jade, this is not a movie. You know that this time it is too dangerous.

Captain Black

Jackie! Robbery in progress, financial district! It's the Dark Hand!

Jackie

Uhh, good luck with that?

Captain Black

They're packing heat. Talisman heat.

Captain Black

I know you're eager to get on with your life, my friend, but you know more about these Talismans than anyone.

Jackie

Uh but-

Captain Black

I need you, Jackie. One last time.

Jackie

...One last time.

Jade

Just when you think you're out, they pull you back in. So can I-

No! [they leave]

Jade

Didn't even let me ask! ...And if I didn't ask, how am I supposed to know what they said "no" to?

Jade

Need a lift? [picks Jackie up in the Jet Pack]

Jackie

I told you never play with things you don't know how to-

Jade

[pointing out the controls] Ignition, steering, throttle, brakes.

Jackie

[sigh] Faster.

Jackie

Look out!

Yeah right, like I'm gonna fall for tha-

Ugh, immortality hurts.

Jackie

But I don't understand! Valmont can't summon the Shadowkhan. Only Shendu.

[in possession of Valmont's body] Reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated, Chan.

Whoa!

Destroy them...

Go away, we are closed for inventory!

El Toro Fuerte

We are not customers.

JACKIE! A burglar!

Jackie

[runs in] Uncle, he is no thief! He is- [Uncle cuffs him] Ow!

Of course he is a thief! He is wearing a mask!

Oh no no no, El Toro Fuerte never removes his mask!

Jackie

Jade, explain.

Jade

It's your team, duh. The J-Team. The Chan Clan. The Chantastic five!

Jackie

Chantastic?

Jade

Five, see? You and me make two! And then there's Viper! And El Toro makes four!

And I, Paco am the fifth member of the J-Team!

Jade

I actually had someone less...puny in mind. [looks to Tohru]

Hmm? ...I am honored.

Jackie

I am sorry you all came here for nothing, but I didn't realize my niece read so many comic books.

Jackie

Uncle, please. Slow down.

Jade

You so need to chill!

If I chill, Demons will be dancing upon all our graves! I must research the proper Chi Spells to seal the seven portals! All required ingredients must be on hand and ready!

Jackie

Uncle, at least let me help! [Uncle grabs him by the ear]

What do you know about magic?! I was apprentice to Chi Master Fong for fifteen years! [sighs] Perhaps it is time for me to train an apprentice of my own. Someone of sound Judgement, whom I can trust with my Chi knowledge.

Jade

Me, me, me! I'll put some focus in your hocus!

Tohru!

Huh?!

Jackie

Uncle! The Pan'ku box!

I think there is a bigger problem to solve.

[sighs] I must do research...

Uh, no need, sensei. I believe no finishing charm was applied to the original duplication spell. That is why it continues to repeat.

Huh?

Uh, I did some reading during the long flight.

Tohru will be a good apprentice.

Jackie

Did you bring the finishing charm?

[nods] But it will only work on the original Jade.

Jackie

Jade!

Jackie

[groans] Okay! Whoever cast the spell in the first place is grounded with no TV for a year!

Jade Clones

[gasp] She did it! [all point to one Jade]

Jade

Tch...tattle-tales.