Carly Shay quotes from iCarly

Carly

No fudge balls were harmed during this web show.

Sam

Yeah, they were.

Carly

Oh, right, a man sat on them.

Gibby

Hi, guys.

Carly

Hey, Gibby.

Freddie

How's it going?

Gibby

Bad. Mr. Howard just gave me detention.

Carly

For what?

Gibby

For being too "Gibby".

Carly

How can you be too "Gibby"?

Gibby

That's what I said! But, you know, not everybody gets me.

Mr. Howard

Oh, I get you, Gibby. I get you like a rash. The question is how do I get rid of you?

Gibby

Baby powder?

Mr. Howard

That's double detention.

Gibby

But baby powder gets rid of rashes!

Mr. Howard

Triple detention!

Gibby

VOLCANO!!! [vomits in a nearby trash can]

Sam

Ugh, I can't believe school's actually gotten worse.

Carly

Shh.

Freddie

Be quiet.

Sam

[sulkily] I don't wanna be quiet! I hate these clothes! Wearing blue and khaki makes me feel like a nub! [to Freddie] No offense to you and all the other nubs in the world.

Carly

[warns Sam] You shouldn't criticize the dress code out loud.

Sam

Why? It's not like they're gonna hear me, and how come I gotta--

Sam Puckett, to the principal's office!

Sam

Huh? Why?

I heard you.

Mr. Howard

You wipe that look off your face!

Freddie

This isn't a look! It's just my face!

Mr. Howard

Well, you should get your money back.

Carly

(grabs Freddie by the shoulder) Okay, we've gotta get Principal Franklin his job back!

Freddie

Shhhhhh! Don't say that--

Carly Shay, to the principal's office!

Carly

Coming! (to Freddie) I'm so scared!

Freddie

(walks up to Gibby and pats him) Freddie's gotcha...

Carly

Okay, you have no idea how psyched we are that you're back.

Principal Franklin

You are in big trouble, Carly! And so are you two! I was very clear yesterday when I told you that I did not want you-(Carly interrupts him) What, what?

Carly

He's gone!

Principal Franklin

(long pause) ...I love you guys. (the four start cheering and hi-fiving each other)

Gibby

(runs into the hall shirtless) YEAH! YEAH, UH-HUH! (the four look at him oddly, and the episode ends as they continue hi-fiving)

[gets hit with a muffin] Ow!

Carly

What?

He just threw a muffin at me.

Carly

Well, that is-- [gets hit with a muffin by Sam] Ow! Sam!

Sam

It slipped!

You got a cranberry on your nose.

Carly

[removes the cranberry, folds her arms, and grabs a muffin and attempts to hit Sam, but it hits an elderly lady]

Ahhhh!

Carly

[shocked] I'm so sorry!

Sam

I accept your apology.

Carly

It wasn't for you; it was for the lady I muffined!

Carly

I'm just saying, it might be nice if you showed a tiny bit of appreciation for the work I do to make iCarly happen.

Sam

MORE appreciation? You already named the show after yourself.

Carly

Well, if you don't like the name iCARLY, then maybe we should change it to... iSAM, who's too lazy to even show up for rehearsal most of the time.

Freddie

All friends have fights.

Carly

Yeah, but this one was different. It wasn't even like a fight. I mean, we didn't yell or anything. We just said stuff, and it was bad.

Freddie

Come on, you and Sam have been friends forever.

Carly

I know, but people change.

T-Bo

Mm-hmm. That's what happened with me and my friend Eddie Robinson. He got hit by a bus. Now he's Deaddie Robinson. Talk about change. (holds up a stick of muffins) Try a muffin. (he gives one to Carly)

Carly

...He told us about his dead friend and then gave me a muffin.

Carly

I know you're upset, but hedge clippers are never the answer.

Sam

Well...

Carly

Never the answer!

Carly

I can do iCarly by myself.

Sam

You can't do iCarly without me!

Freddie

I MEAN IT! BOTH OF YOU, GET BACK INSIDE, RIGHT NOW!

Sam

I'm not going back in unless Carly goes first!

Carly

Well I'm not going back in 'till Dave and I shoot what we need for our video! ...No matter how messy this wind makes my hair!

Carly, it’s not worth it! And you guys are friends, you shouldn’t be fighting!

Yeah, friends shouldn’t fight!

I just said that!

Well, I thought it before you said it!

Liar!

Sam

Carly! Don't let go!

Carly

[hanging from the edge of the platform] WHY ON EARTH WOULD I LET GO?!?!

Sam

I have as much of a right to Freddie as you do!

Carly

No, you don't! Freddie loves me!

Freddie

Hey, look, a freckle on my wrist...

Carly

Look, we made it.

Sam

Yeah, and neither one of us cried the whole time.

Carly

Nope. We're brave.

Sam

Yeah, we are.

Spencer

Hey, look. his toes sticks out of his cast! This little piggy went to market, and this little piggy got hit by a truck.

Carly

SPENCER!