Will Schuester quotes from Glee

Will

[to Finn] Boy meets girl. Boy loses girl. Boy mopes around and sits on his ass until his best man helps save the day. Thank you.

Will

There comes a moment in every performer's life that defines him or her, sometimes for the rest of their career. This is our moment. We've struggled. We've endured. And now we must triumph.

Will

2nd place is not losing, it's like winning a silver medal in the Olympics.

Will

We were all raised by different parents. But we grew up together in the glee club. It's a part of all of us.

Will

I don't have any more pep talks. I just have you guys. And the memory of the people on this wall. My friends. I mean, we share this special bond. We're the only ones in the world who know what this glee club meant to us. What it felt like to sing together. Go be together. And what it feels like to say goodbye to it. I didn't come here to cheer you up. Just to thank you. To thank you for going on this ride with me.

Will

[to Emma] It took everything I had not to cry. It's like they've all walked a thousand miles just to get punched in the stomach.

Will

Life only really has one beginning and one end, and the rest is just a whole lot of middle.

Will

Who cares what happens when we get there, when the getting-there has been so much fun?

Sue

High school is a caste system. Kids fall into certain slots. Your jocks and your popular kids up in the penthouse. The invisibles and the kids playing live-action out in the forest: bottom floor.

Will

And... where do the Glee kids lie?

Sue

Subbasement.

Will

Hey, how come you haven't had any morning sickness? Quinn Fabray's been upchucking every fifteen minutes.

Really? That's a really good sign! That means the baby's not a mongoloid!

Emma

I just got back from the emergency room. I had them give me four decontamination showers. I think they call that the full Silkwood.

Will

What happened?

Emma

Kurt was drunk and he ralphed on me. Not really fessing up to how he got the booze just yet, but I'm pretty sure it's not a fake I.D. because he looks like an eleven-year-old milkmaid. Will, I think it was April. Her backpack's always clinking with empties.

Will

I've got to figure out some way to motivate them.

Emma

Okay, well, you, um you could, well, what about a sticker board? That's how my parents got me to do chores when I was a kid. All right, so I do a chore, and then I get a star, and then-

Sue

Oh, dear God. Please please stop talking. I'm trying desperately to ignore the treacly sweet insanity of your asinine conversation but now I've got bile in my mouth and I will hold my tongue no further. You know what this is? This is a list of my Cheerios. Every week I pick someone at random, and I kick 'em out.

Will

Yeah, well, in Glee club we do things a little bit differently.

Sue

Oh, yeah, Will? How's that workin' out for you? You have to remember something. We're dealing with children. They need to be terrified. It's like mother's milk to them. Without it, their bones won't grow properly. So if you want results with a kid you find that competitive animal within, and unleash it. [to Emma] Oh and that blouse is just insane. [gets up and leaves]

Emma

...Can't believe she's allowed to teach at this school.

Will

Um, is-is everything okay, Terri? - You-You never visit me at work.

Oh, I'm not visiting. No. You've been so stressed about our finances lately that I thought I would pitch in by getting a second job. I'm the new school nurse.

Will

But you're not a nurse. You don't have any training.

Oh please, Will. It's a public school.

Will

You being here is not good for our marriage.

Spending time together is not good for our marriage?

Will

Not every minute! We used to come home every night and talk about our day. Now we have nothing to say to each other.

...A lot of ants on the sidewalk today.

Will

...Pretty late in the season for that.

Will

I will destroy you.

Sue

I am about to vomit down your back.

Will

It's on.