Mmm, you're cooking me back fat bacon.
That's not back fat bacon! That's your back fat bakin'!
S6Neutopia
I got your distress call and came here as soon as I wanted to.
I've found a loophole. It says here that we can renew the mortgage for the building by actually paying it. All we need is... $11,000,000.
Aaand boned.
S6Benderama
AGAnnouncer Guy
[in outer space where a horse and a man switched roles and a whale plays the trombone its blowhole] Enclosed as a PDF attachment, a picture of yourself in a boat in the river. [cues on a slinky going up the stairs] It's a river that flows in two directions...make that three. [the Earth is disguised as bubble gum] It's a magic river, that's how; and it's flowing down the eerie canal to The Scary Door. That's "eerie" with two Es.
Hey you! Good evening. Who you calling drunk? You're not drunk, I'm drunk!
Tha's right Linda. Water is n... now booze and everyone's... titty much protally fitshaced.
Our top story: All alcohol on Earth has mysteriously disappeared. Consequences are minimal, except among the most hardened alcoholics. Linda?
I can no longer face my children!!!
You wanna see a picture of my boy?
Sure. [Hermes presents photo] That's your penis!
That's my boy!
This chair is so comfortable. [She throws up]
Heh, heh. Classic Amy.
You'll have to be respectful. This customer is fifty-feet tall and sensitive about his appearance.
Colossal tooth whitener, mega deodorant, humongous acne cream... Aw, and one regular-sized condom.
All that and a small wiener? This guy's got it goin' on.
[Bender's couch gets devoured by his microscopic clones]
CCrew
[Worried muttering]
What's with the gray goo? [zooms in]
OBOne of Bender's clones
Bite my tiny, metal ass!
Hey, those jerklings ate my couch!
Oh, God. We've opened Pandora's fly. They'll reproduce without limit, consuming all the matter in the world!
Like the Kardashians!
Bad news, everyone! Look at this infinite series representing the mass of successive generations of Benders.
[A hologram of equation appear, everyone gasps in horror except Fry]
Don't wait for me.
It's nonconvergent!
[alarmed] Oh, dip!
UGUnattractive Giant Monster
All I wanted was to apologize to you people! But now I have to kill you!
How, by making me look at you?
UGUnattractive Giant Monster
No, by making you look at... my momma! [Shows picture to Bender, who recoils in horror]
Augh! Your momma's so ugly!
UGUnattractive Giant Monster
I told you not to talk about my momma!
Legion of Benders, come unto me! We have one thing to do.
BCBender clones
Screw that!
Oh, come on, you lazy jerks! If we all pitch in, we each only have to do one-quintillionth of a thing.
BCBender clones
[sigh] All right.
Bender, you duuu.
No, we duuu.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Futurama pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.