Frasier is sharing his thoughts on a wine with Martin, in his usual verbose fashion
You don't think it's clear that I enjoy the wine?
I don't think it's clear you're talking about wine.
S8 E18Forgotten But Not Gone
Wine-tasting at the wine club
I'm getting oak with plummy overtones.
EEndicott
I'm getting screwed on alimony.
(Walks in) Niles, I want to talk to you.
Dad! What happened, is there something wrong?
You're damn right there is, it's about you and Frasier! (notices) Good God, you wear a sash?!
Frasier sent you down here, didn't he?
(o.s. from above) No!
Frasier, get in here now!
Frasier shuffles in beside Niles. The following scene looks like a father dressing down two toddlers — a spectacle that both Frasier and Niles are desperate to avoid
Dad, this isn't necessary.
Yeah, we-we can talk about this some other time.
Zip it up, both of you! I just gave up the best meal of my life to come down here, so listen up. Niles, let your brother play.
Dad, this is not a game, this is a club, and Frasier broke the rules!
Technically, I-
Hold it! (To Niles) Well, then you write a new rule so that Frasier can come back.
First, I want an apology-
I said zip it!
He did, I heard him!
Don't get smart! Now, are you gonna let your brother play?
Dad-
Are you gonna let your brother play?
Why-
Are you gonna let your brother play?
I-
Are you gonna let your brother play?
(Gives in) Fine.
Am I gonna have any more trouble between you two?
FNFrasier/Niles
(Humbly) No.
No, what?
FNFrasier/Niles
No, sir.
Good. Now shake hands. (They do) That's more like it. Now if you don't mind, I've got a big plate of Gewürzplatzchen waiting for me at home with my name on it. (Leaves)
Uh, well, [chuckles] let's get back to the wine, shall we?
RReynolds
You got yelled at by your dad. (All the members laugh)
Well, be that as it may-
EEndicott
Zip it! (Everyone laughs louder)
S8 E19Daphne Returns
In the midst of the argument
I can't read minds, you know. And by the way, neither can you!
Are you saying you don't think I'm psychic?!
Not if you thought I loved your cooking!
Well, I'm sorry it's not that hoity-toity crap you eat!
What does that mean? You, you think I'm pretentious?
You'd eat a worm if I gave it a French name!
Well fine! If that's the way you feel, maybe I'll just have dinner by myself! (Storms out of the apartment)
Well, good! It'll spare you the hell that's my cooking! (Heads back for her room)
(Hurries back in through the door, Daphne turns back) I am so sorry! I love you so much! (Runs into Daphne's arms, they embrace) I didn't mean any of those things!
Yes you did. And I did too. You’re a pretentious snob, with your wine and your opera.
YOU NEVER GIVE OPERA A CHANCE! You're too judgmental.
And you're a clean freak.
Well...I hate your unicorn collection.
And I hate that your closet is bigger than mine!
Well...you're too tall!
You're too short. (They kiss passionately)
S8 E20The Wizard and Roz
Dr. Tewksbury has been observing Niles and Daphne in Café Nervosa. Roz explains Daphne's belief that she is psychic
TTewksbury
Well, no matter who's right or wrong, Niles needs to set up stricter boundaries with his patients. I learned that from years of practice.
No, she's not his patient; she's his girlfriend.
TTewkesbury
Oh well, in that case, no matter who's right or wrong, he's wrong. I learned that from years of marriage.
At the last minute, Niles changes his mind and asks not to be given the results of the test
Sorry, Dr. Morey. We've wasted your time.
MMorey
It's OK. Eddie told me a couple of funny jokes while we were waiting.
Niles and Daphne look taken aback
MMorey
I'm kidding!...They weren't that funny.
S8 E22A Passing Fancy
Frasier has just introduced Kirby to Roz
She has gotta be pretty distracting around the office, huh?
Well, yes, sometimes, but she's union, so you put up with it.
Frasier thinks of a way to persuade Roz to help him out
So, how you gonna get her to go with me?
Oh, you just leave that up to me and Mr. Bruce Springsteen.
The Boss!
No, Bruce Springsteen.
S8 E23A Day in May
I'd hardly call this a dog park. (looks around) It's more like a dog...orgy. Whose beagles are those?
Don't stare. It only encourages them.
S8 E24Cranes Go Caribbean
Niles, I'm sorry. It turns out Claire and I are going to Belize after all. You and Daphne will have to go some place else.
Wait. Daphne has her heart set to Belize.
Niles, this is not Cranes Go Caribbean! I want to be alone with Claire.
Frasier has had a car accident because of Lana and will miss his flight
At least whoever gets my seat on the plane will be happy.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Frasier pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.