[During an interview for KACL, the author is asked about the inspiration for his book. Frasier is listening outside]
FFallow
Well, it was actually given to me...by God.
By GOD? Do you believe this guy's grandiosity? I'm God, and he knows it!
S2 E1Slow Tango in South Seattle
You know how hard it is to lie to someone's face.
Oh, no, it's easy for someone as bright and charming and articulate as you.
Well, then, perhaps you're right.
See how easy it is.
S2 E2The Unkindest Cut of All
[Martin is annoyed by Frasier's repeated instructions to take Eddie to the vet]
If anybody wants me, I'll be down at Duke's. [exits]
You ever noticed how much faster he moves when he's wrong?
[about drawer-dividers for socks] I saw them once in a catalogue, but I couldn't imagine who in the world would buy such silly things. Course, I hadn't met Dr. Crane yet.
I used to think there'd been some sort of mix-up at the hospital. Of course, when Niles came along, it shot that theory all to hell.
S2 E3The Matchmaker
[Daphne explains that the smoke alarm over her bed went off]
God, the noise the bloody thing makes! It would be less upsetting just to wake up on fire!
God, you look like you've been ridden hard and put away wet.
Yes, well I was up 'til all hours of the night with Daphne, competing to see which of us has the more pathetic love life. On the bright side, I won.
S2 E4Flour Child
One minute it's just a blob in some lady's stomach, the next minute it's a person. Blob... Person.
The miracle of birth, summed up in one poetic phrase.
[Niles' bag of flour is showing signs of fire damage after being dried beside the hearth]
He caught on fire?
It was not as careless as you make it seem. After all, a real child would have cried before it burst into flames.
S2 E5Duke's We Hardly Knew Ye
[Daphne is dressed up for a date, and is testing her perfume when Niles arrives]
[sniffs around Daphne] Is that "Forbidden"?
In every sense of the word!
[Martin reveals the truth about MeadowWood Properties' demolition plans while proposing a toast, prompting his sons to down their boilermakers]
To Duke's!
RRegulars
To Duke's!
[to Duke] Two more!
S2 E6The Botched Language of Cranes
[Frasier has declined to make a personal appearance at a hospital.]
What? You're turning down a hospital?
Don't look at me that way.
Hey, I'm with you. I hate the way those whiny sick people are always nagging you for things. "I want a magazine!" "I want a kidney!"
Good afternoon, Seattle. This is Dr. Frasier Crane, KACL 780. Well, it's another gray, depressing day here in the Emerald City. Here's hoping we can brighten up your afternoon. We hold it our personal duty to banish your rainy day blues. But first, a message from a new sponsor. [reads] "Death is inevitable"...
S2 E7The Candidate
It makes me glad we don't have so many guns in England.
You don't need guns: you got kidney pie.
[Despite a shocking revelation about Patterson, Niles is still keen for him to defeat Thorpe]
Can you tell me, with any certainty, that in such a vast universe there isn't intelligent life on other planets?
At the moment, I'm not sure there's intelligent life in this kitchen.
S2 E8Adventures in Paradise
[Martin remembers how he met his wife.]
Hester was a psychiatrist, so every now and again the department would have her run up a profile on a suspect. I remember the first time I met her. It was over the chalk outline of a murder victim. She drew a little smile on the head of the outline, and I drew a pair of eyes, and before you knew it we were laughing like a couple of kids.
Dad, you're a ghoul.
I was joking. We couldn't draw on the outline. They hadn't moved the body yet.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Frasier pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.