Phil Stubbs quotes from Ed

Phil

I know the gang thinks its adorable to call you ‘Molls' but to keep everyone within earshot from vomiting, I'm gonna stick with 'Molly'.

Phil

[showing the truckers his edible air fresheners] Now that's a 10-4 if I ever tasted one, good buddy.

Phil

Truckers don't live on gas, grass, and ass alone.

Phil

[to Ed] When did you stop being 'my man' and start being 'The Man'?

Phil

[to AFL-CIO reps] Don't let me rot to death in this sweatshop!

Phil

[to Gus the tailor] If you don't mind, I like my tailors to be called 'Antonio'.

Phil

[as Ed departs with an irate Carol] My man Bosco's about to get a good ole fashioned ass chewin'.

Phil

[about Eli] Look at him squirm now that the chair's on the other foot...or should I say ass?

Phil

[on Eli's forfeit] I've enjoyed a lot of victories in my life but for some reason, this one is particularly sweet.

Phil

[to Ed, thinking Jen is a stripper] Jennifer. Huh. How do these dancers come up with these names?

Phil

[about Ed's work ethic] I thought, hmmmm, he must be Amish.

Phil

[Pleased to learn Frankie is signing on] Ever since Kenny left, there's a real lack of sexual tension here.

Phil

[as president, in Ed's dream] Mr. Vice President, there is nothing more important than the day a boy becomes a man in the eyes of God.

Phil

[as president, in Ed's dream] Say the word and I will Air Force One our asses to Cancun.

Phil

[trying to convince Ed to hire him as a jockey] I'm actually deceptively light. I have the bone structure of a bird.