Spike quotes from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Tara

So Spike! How's that muscle cramp?

Spike

What? Oh... uh... yeah. Better.

Tara

[smirking] Maybe you, uh, wanna put some ice on it.

Spike

What, poor dainty Richard can't take a joke?

Buffy

We do not joke about eating people in this house!

Buffy

Tell me you love me.

Spike

I love you... you know I do.

Buffy

Tell me you want me.

Spike

[huskily] I always want you.

Spike

It's nice to watch you be happy, for them, even, I don't see it a lot, you, uh... you glow.

Buffy

That's because the dress is radioactive.

Spike

Oh, balls! You didn't say he was a Glarghk Guhl Kashmas'nik!

Xander

'Cause I can't say Glarba...

Buffy

You tell them if you want. Go ahead. Rock the boat. Rock and roll it the hell over. My friends and I'll still be groovin' with the movin'. [She stakes the first vamp] Know why? I tried to kill my friends, my sister, last week and guess how much they hate me now? Zero. Zero much. So I'm thinking, sleeping with you... They'll deal.

Spike

In that case why won't you sleep with me again?

Buffy

[walking away] Because I don't love you

Spike

[To himself] Like hell.

You seek me, vampire?

Spike

[observing the cave walls] You do the finger paintings? Nice work.

Answer me.

Spike

Yeah... I seek you.

Something about a woman. The Slayer.

Spike

[angrily] Thinks she's better than me. Ever since I got this bleeding chip in my head, I haven't been right. Everything's gone to hell.

And you want to return to your former self.

Spike

Yeah. [the demon laughs darkly] What?

Look what she's reduced you to.

Spike

It's this bloody chip, not--

You were a legendary dark warrior, and you let yourself be castrated! Now you have the audacity to crawl in here and demand restoration?

Spike

I'm still a warrior--

You're a pathetic excuse for a demon!

Spike

Yeah? I'll show you who's pathetic. Give me your best shot, Lurky.

You'd never endure the trials required to grant your request.

Spike

Do your worst. But when I win, I want what I came here for. Bitch is gonna see a change...

You have completed the required challenges.

Spike

Bloody right I have. Now give me what I came for. Make me what I was so Buffy can get what she deserves.

Very well. [places his hand on Spike's chest] We will return...your soul.

Spike

Ain't we in a sodding engine?

Buffy

Spike, have you completely lost your mind?

Spike

Well, yes. Where have you been all night?

Spike

I dreamed of killing you. I think they were dreams. So weak... did you make me weak? Thinking of you. Holding myself and spilling useless buckets of salt over your... ending. Angel, he should've warned me. Makes a good show of forgetting, but it's here. In me. All the time. The spark. I wanted to give you... what you deserve. And I got it. They put the spark in me and now all it does is burn.

Buffy

Your soul?

Spike

Bit worse for lack of use.

Buffy

You got your soul back. How?

Spike

It's what you wanted, right? It's... it's what you wanted, right? And-and now everybody's in here... talking. Everything I did... everyone I... and HIM. And it. The other. The thing... beneath... beneath you. It's here, too. Everybody. They all just tell me go. Go... to Hell.

Buffy

Why? Why would you do that?

Spike

Buffy, shame on you. Why does a man do what he musn't? For her. To be hers. To be the kind of man who would nev... To be a kind of man. And she shall look on him with forgiveness... and everybody will forgive and love. And he will be loved. So everything's okay, right? C-can we rest now? Buffy? Can we rest?

Spike

Red's a bad girl.

Buffy

He's talking about Willow.

Xander

And that means something 'cause he's chock full of sanity.

Spike

William's a good boy. Carries her water, carries her sin. Supposed to get easier, isn't it. Supposed to help to help, but it doesn't. Still so heavy.

Xander

We should've put a leash on him.

Buffy

Yes, let's tie ourselves to the crazy vampire.

Buffy

Spike, this basement is killing you. This is the Hellmouth. There is something bad down here, possibly everything bad.

Buffy

You have a soul? Fine. Show me.

Spike

Scream "Montresor" all you like, pet.

Buffy

Get up and get out of this basement.

Spike

I don't have anywhere else to go.

You know you were a lot more fun when you didn't have a soul.

Spike

Oh, come on now, I've just explained to you...

All I'm saying is soulless Spike would have had me upside down and half-way to happyland by now.

Spike

Well, I certainly didn't off her. Where are you getting this? You know I can't.

Buffy

Right. The chip.

Spike

No, not the chip! Not the chip, dammit. You honestly think I'd go to the end of the underworld and back to get my soul and then-- Buffy, I can barely live with what I did. It haunts me. All of it. If you think that I would add to the body count now, you are crazy.