Dawn Summers quotes from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Dawn

[voice over] I-I could so save the world if somebody handed me superpowers! But I-I'd think of a cool name and wear a mask to protect my loved ones. Which Buffy doesn't even!

Dawn

[voice over] Nobody knows who I am. Not the real me. It's like nobody cares enough to find out. I mean, does anyone ever ask me what I want to do with my life, or what my opinion is on stuff, or what restaurant to order in from? No. Underline, Exclamation point. Exclamation point, exclamation point. No one understands. No one has an older sister who's a Slayer. People wouldn't be so crazy about her if they had to live in the same house with her every single day. Everybody cares what she thinks, just 'cause she can do backflips and stuff. Like that's such a crucial job skill in the real world. Plus, Mom lets her get away with everything. "Your sister's saving the world." I could so save the world if somebody handed me superpowers, but I'd think of a cool name and wear a mask to protect my loved ones, which Buffy doesn't even. If this town wasn't so lame, everyone would completely know what she does. And then I bet they wouldn't even be that impressed, because, like, killing things with wood? Oh. Scary vampires. They die from a splinter.

Dawn

Anya's going to try to cook. Want to watch the tears and recriminations?

Dawn

Destroyer of the universe. Guess cutting school doesn't seem so bad now, huh.

Buffy

I'm out of here. Riley and I are going to the movies.

Joyce

Okay. Have a good time.

Buffy

What are you doing here?

Joyce

Buffy? If you're going out, why don't you take your sister?

[together] Mom!

Buffy

You are going to be in so much trouble when we get home! [swings ax]

Dawn

Yeah, well, I'm telling Mom you slayed in front of me.

Buffy

Fine! I'll just tell her that you ran out of the house in the middle of the night! [swings ax] That you got Anya hurt! [swings ax] Invited a vampire in! [swings ax] Got kidnapped! ...

Giles

There is nothing but you. You are the center. And within you, there is the core of your being... of what you are. Find it. Breathe into it. Focus inward. Let the world fall away. Fall away. Fall away.

Buffy

[gasps]

Dawn

Can we go now?

Buffy

You want her, Mr. Maclay? You can go ahead and take her. You just gotta go through me.

What?

Buffy

You heard me! You wanna take Tara out of here against her will? You gotta come through me.

Dawn

And me!

Is this a joke? I'm not gonna be threatened by two little girls!

Dawn

You don't wanna mess with us.

Buffy

She's a hair-puller.

Giles

And you're not just dealing with two little girls.

Xander

You're dealing with all of us.

Spike

[Holds up hand] Except me.

Xander

Except Spike.

Spike

I don't care what happens.

Dawn

Alone time always translates into let's get Dawn out of the house so we can have loud, obnoxious sex.

[to Xander] Does that mean we can't?

Dawn

I just think you're freakin' out 'cause you have to fight someone prettier than you. That is the case, right?

Buffy

Glory is evil. And powerful. And in no way prettier than me.

Buffy

Are you okay? Did she hurt you?

Dawn

Why do you care?

Buffy

Because I love you, you're my sister.

Dawn

No I'm not.

Buffy

Yes you are. [holds Dawn's hand] It's blood, Summers blood, it's just like mine. It doesn't matter where you came from, or how you got here, you are my sister. There's no way you could annoy me so much if you weren't.

Buffy

I have to get you back home though, Mom's freaking out.

Dawn

Oh, is she mad about the whole fire thing?

Buffy

I think you sort of have a "Get out of jail free" card on account of big love and trauma.

Dawn

Really? Okay, good. Do you think she'd raise my allowance?

Buffy

Don't push it.

Buffy

How was school today?

Dawn

The usual, big square building filled with boredom and despair.

Buffy

Just how I remember it.

Joyce

I think we're just about ready for pie.

Xander

And then I'll be pretty much ready for barf.

Buffy

Xander!

Dawn

Gross.

Xander

You know, barf from the eating. 'Cause all was good and too much goodness.

Joyce

I'm taking it as a compliment.

Giles

Yes, everything was delicious.

Yes. I'm going to barf, too.

Joyce

Everyone's so sweet.

Xander

How you doin' there, Will? Are you in the vomit club, too?

Willow

[groans] I had too much nog.

Tara

Oh, baby. Want me to rub your tummy? She likes it when I... uh, s-stop explaining things.

Dawn

My nog tastes funny. I think I got one with rum in it.

Willow

That's... bad.

Xander

Yeah! Now Santa's gonna pass you right by! Naughty boozehound.

Willow

Santa always passes me by. Something puts him off. Could be the big honkin' menorah.

I mean, it's a myth that it's a myth. There is a Santa Claus.

Xander

The advantage of having a thousand-year-old girlfriend. Inside scoop.

Tara

There's a Santa Claus?

Mm-hmm. Been around since, like, the 1500s. But he wasn't always called Santa. But with, you know, Christmas night, flying reindeer, coming down the chimney -- all true.

Dawn

All true?

Well, he doesn't traditionally bring presents so much as, you know, disembowel children. But otherwise...

Tara

The reindeer part was nice.

Dawn

I know why you're doing this. I mean,you're practically stalking my sister

Spike

Its not that. I just don't like to see Summers women taking it on the chin. And I mean what I said earlier. You tell her about this, I'll put you in the ground as well.

Spike

I'm a vampire. I know something about evil. You're not evil.

Dawn

Maybe I'm not evil. But I don't think I can be good.

Spike

Well, I'm not good, and I'm alright.