BuffyLagos is out of luck. I got the magic mitten thingy. What's with all the tragedy masks?
Better take a seat, Buffy.
Buffy
What's going on?
We know Angel is alive. Xander saw you with him. It would appear that you've been hiding him and that you lied to us.
Nobody's here to blame you, Buffy. But this is serious. You need help.
Buffy
It's not what you think.
Hope not, because I think you're harboring a vicious killer.
This isn't about attacking Buffy. Remember, "I" statements only. "I feel angry." "I feel worried."
Fine. Here's one. I feel worried. About me! Last time around, Angel barely laid a hand on Buffy. He was way more interested in killing her friends.
Buffy
But he's better now.
Better for how long, Buffy? I mean, did you even think about that?
Buffy
What is this, demons anonymous? I don't need an intervention here.
Oh, don't you? You must've known it was wrong seeing Angel, or you wouldn't have hidden it from all of us.
Buffy
I was going to tell you, I was. It was just that I... I didn't know why he came back. I-I just wanted to wait.
For what? For Angel to go psycho again the next time you give him a happy?
Buffy
I'm not going to... We're not together like that.
But you were kissing him.
Buffy
You were spying on me? What gives you the right?
What gives you the right to suck face with your demon lover again?
Buffy
It was an accident.
What, you just tripped and fell on his lips?
Buffy
It was wrong, okay? I know that, and I know that it can't happen again. But you guys have to believe me. I would never put you in any danger. If I thought for second that Angel was gonna hurt anyone...
You would stop him. Like you did last time with Ms. Calendar.
Buffy, I feel that when it comes to Angel, you can't see straight. And that's why we're-we're all going to help you face this.
Buffy
But he's better now, I swear. Look, you guys, he's the one that found the Glove of Myhnegon. He's keeping it safe for us in the mansion.
[about Angel] Right! Great plan. Leave tons of firepower with the scary guy, and leave us to clean up the mess.
Buffy
[stops Xander from leaving] You would just love an excuse to hurt him, wouldn't you?
I don't need an excuse. I think lots of dead people actually constitutes a reason.
Buffy
Right. This is all nobility. This has nothing to do with jealousy.
Hello? Miss Not-Over-Yourself-Yet?
Buffy
Don't you start with me.
Giles, no one's doing the "I" statements.
That's enough! Everybody. Now Buffy knows our concerns, and her actions, however ill-advised, can be understood. Our... priority right now is to retrieve the Glove of Myhnegon and try to destroy it. Now, all of you, back to your classes.
[they leave]
Buffy
Thanks for the bail in there. I know this is a lot to absorb, but Angel did find the glove, and that was a good--
Be quiet. I won't remind you that the fate of the world often lies with the Slayer. What would be the point? Nor shall I remind you that you've jeopardized the lives of all that you hold dear by harboring a known murderer. But sadly, I must remind you that Angel tortured me... for hours... for pleasure. You should have told me he was alive. You didn't. You have no respect for me, or the job I perform.
So there's no more glove thing-y?
No. Little living flame, little mesquite, gone for good.
Sounds like we missed a lot of fun.
Then we're telling it wrong.
What do you think Buffy and Angel are gonna do?
Well, he saved me from a horrible flamey death. That sort of makes me like him again.
Well, as long as she and Angel don't get pelvic, we'll be okay, I guess.
Buffy
What are you guys talking about?
Oddly enough, your boyfriend. Again.
Buffy
He's not my boyfriend. Really, truly, he's... I don't know. Are we cool?
Yeah. Just seeing the two of you kissing after everything that happened, I leaned toward the postal. But I trust you.
I don't, just for the record.
Buffy
Let me guess. Gwendolyn Post, not a Watcher?
Yes, she was. She was, uh, kicked out by the Council a couple of years ago for misuses of Dark Power. They swear there was a memo.
Buffy
Well, I better go. Little more damage control.
[sighs] The whole Angel thing is so weird.
Yes, well, we'll have to see how that unfolds, won't we?
Buffy
Hey. The place looks nice.
Buffy
How are you?
Buffy
I'll interpret that as good. Look, Gwendolyn Post, or whoever she may be, had us all fooled, even Giles.
Yeah, well, you can trust people. I should've learned that by now.
Buffy
I realize this is gonna sound funny coming from someone that just spent a lot of time kicking your face... but you can trust me.
Buffy
I know I kept secrets, but I didn't have a choice. I'm on your side.
I'm on my side, and that's enough.
Buffy
Not always.
Buffy
Yeah, I guess.
All right. Well, then, I'll see you. Uh, Buffy?
Buffy
Yeah?
The last time I looked in on you two, you were fighting to the death. Now you're back to making googly-eyes at each other like nothing happened. Makes me want to heave.
Buffy
I don't know what you're talking about.
Oh, yeah, you're just friends.
You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'til it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other 'til it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood -- blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it.
This is a nightmare. This is... my world is spinning.
It's not that bad, Willow, really.
740? Verbal? I'm-I'm pathetic! Illiterate! I'm Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel.
That's right. And the fact that your 740 verbal closely resembles my combined scores in no way compromises your position as the village idiot.
I just... where did I go wrong?
You did amazing, Willow. As usual.
Cordelia! Willow is very sad about her academic failure. How did you do? This is not good.
Well, I'm just worried it may hurt my standing as campus stud when people find out I'm dating a brain.
Please. I have some experience in covering these things up.
Well, I can see why you'd be upset. That was my sarcastic voice.
You know, it sounds a lot like your regular voice.
I've been told that. But we should celebrate, do something.
A double date! It could have potential.
Buffy! Hey, did you get your S.A.T. Scores?
By the look on your face, I'm guessing you and I are going to be manning the drive-through window side by side.
Buffy
They're just test scores, right? What do they really mean, anyway?
1430! Buffy, you kicked ass! Okay, so academic achievement gets me a little excited.
Yeah. With scores like that, you can apply pretty much anywhere you want.
Buffy, this could, like, change your whole future.
Buffy
The though had occurred to me.
Buffy
I don't know. I guess... my future. I never really thought about it. I wasn't even sure I was going to have one.
Well, I think this is great. Now you can leave and never come back! Well, I mean that in a possible way. Get out of Sunnydale. That's a good thing. What kind of moron would ever want to come back here?
Carnegie-Melon has a wonderful design curriculums. Oh, and Brown University's history program is... You like history, right?
Buffy
Could we talk about this another time? All day it's been like, "Congratulations!" "Go away."
That's not it. It's just... you belong at-at a good old-fashioned college with-with keg parties and boys, not here with Hellmouths and vampires.
Buffy
Not really seeing the distinction.
No, you're always talking about how you wish you could lead a more normal life. Well, this is your chance.
Buffy
Yeah, it's just not that simple. I have responsibilities.
I know, I know, but I spoke with Mr. Giles, and he said--
Buffy
That Faith could be Miss Sunnydale in the slayer pageant. I know.
It's time to think about your future, Buffy, about your whole life. I mean, honestly, is there anything keeping you here?
Buffy
No luck reaching Cordelia?
I've left a few messages. Sixty, seventy... but you know what really bugs me? [to Willow] OK, we kissed. It was a mistake. But I know that was positively the last time we were ever gonna kiss.
And they burst in, rescuing us, without even knocking? I mean, this is really all their fault.
Buffy
Your logic does not resemble our Earth logic.
Mine is much more advanced.
Buffy
[choking and grunting] Nnrrf! Nnrrf!
Oh, God. Demon, demon. What kills a demon?!
Buffy
[choking and grunting] Nnrrf! Nnrrf!
Oh, nerf. Not nerf. Knife!
Buffy
Okay. That was too close for comfort. Not that slaying's ever comfy, but, you know what I mean? [sighs] If you guys hadn't been here to help...
But we were. And we did. And-and we're all fine. [sighs] Isn't he gonna go poof?
Buffy
Um, I guess these guys don't. We'll have to bury him or something. [groans] Makes you appreciate vamps though. No fuss, no muss.
So how come Faith was a no-show? I thought mucus-y demons were her favorites.
Buffy
Couldn't reach her. Again. She hasn't been hanging out much.
Buffy
A little bit. Slaying's a rough gig. Too much alone time isn't healthy. Stuff gets pent up.
We should try to do more socializing with her.
Well, burial detail aside, does this cap us off for the day?
Buffy
You got plans?
I cannot stress enough how much I don't have plans.
Buffy
No luck reaching Cordelia?
I've left a few messages. 60. 70. But you know what really bugs me? [to Willow] Okay, we kissed. It was a mistake. But I know that was positively the last time we were ever gonna kiss.
And they burst in, rescuing us, without even knocking? I mean, this is really all their fault.
Buffy
Your logic does not resemble our Earth logic.
Mine is much more advanced.
At least tomorrow's Monday, another school day.
Buffy
Well. that's good. You know, focus on school. That's the strong Willow way to heal.
Actually, I was more thinking Oz will be there, and I can beg for forgiveness.
Buffy
That works, too.
I-I wanna be strong Willow. But then I think I may never get to be close to Oz again, and it's like all the air just goes out of the room.
Buffy
I know the feeling.
Right. I mean, you went through it with Angel, and you're still standing. So tell us, wise one, how do you deal?
Buffy
I have you guys.
[reading] "In order to defeat Anyanka, one must destroy her power center. This should reverse all the wishes she's granted rendering her mortal and powerless again." You see? Without her power center, she-she'd j-just be a-a-an ordinary woman again. And all this would be, um... well, different... Well, I'd say that my... my Watcher muscles haven't completely atrophied after all.
Buffy
[sarcastic] Great. What's her power center?
[checks the book] Um, well, um, uh... It doesn't say.
Buffy
Why don't I just put a stake through her heart?
Buffy
Well, you'd be surprised how many things that'll kill.
I don't want to kill her, Miss Summers. I want to reverse whatever effect she's had on this-this world.
Buffy
[sighs] You're taking an awful lot on faith here, Jeeves.
Buffy
Kill the bad fairy, destroy the bad fairy's power center, whatever... and all the troubles go away?
I'm not a demon, little girl, I am something you cannot even conceive. The First Evil. Beyond sin. Beyond death. I am the thing the darkness fears. You'll never see me, but I am everywhere. Every being. Every thought. Every drop of hate.
Buffy
All right, I get it. You're evil. Do we have to chat about it all day?
Angel will be dead by sunrise. Your Christmas will be his wake.
Buffy
No.
You have no idea what you're dealing with.
Buffy
Let me guess. Is it... evil?
[transforms into a fearsome demonic form, then vanishes] DEAD BY SUNRISE!
I can't do it again Buffy. I can't become a killer.
Buffy
Then fight it.
Buffy
Angel please, you have to get inside!
It told me to kill you. You were in the dream, you know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again.
Buffy
I know what it told you, what does it matter?
[yelling] Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly! I want to take comfort in you. And I know it will cost me my soul, and a part of me doesn't care. I'm weak. It's not the demon that needs killing in me, Buffy. It's the man. Am I a thing worth saving, huh? Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone!
Buffy
What about me? I love you so much, and I tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn't help. And I hate it! I hate that it's so hard... and that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did, because you did it to me. Oh, God! I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. [whispers] I can't.
Buffy, please. Just this once, let me be strong.
Buffy
Strong is fighting! It's hard, and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together. But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world, then I don't know what can. But do not expect me to watch. And don't expect me to mourn for you, because ... [Snow falls, blocking the sunlight.]
Buffy
Angel?
I bet half the kids down there are already awake. Lying in their beds. Sneaking downstairs. Waiting for day.
Buffy
Angel, please. I need you to get inside. There's only a few minutes left.
I know. I can smell the sunrise long before it comes.
Buffy
I don't have time to explain this. You just have to trust me. That thing that was haunting you--
It wasn't haunting me. It was showing me.
Buffy
Showing you?
Buffy
Were.
And ever shall be. I wanted to know why I was back. Now I do.
Buffy
You don't know. Some great evil takes credit for bringing you back and you buy it? You just give up?
I can't do it again, Buffy. I can't become a killer.
Buffy
Then fight it.
Buffy
Angel, please, you have to get inside.
It told me to kill you. You were in the dream, you know. It told me to lose my soul in you and become a monster again.
Buffy
I know what it told you, what does it matter?
[yelling] Because I wanted to! Because I want you so badly. I want to take comfort in you, and I know it'll cost me my soul, and a part of me doesn't care. Look, I'm weak. I've never been anything else. It's not the demon that needs killing, Buffy. It's the man.
Buffy
You're weak. Everybody is. Everybody fails. Maybe this evil did bring you back, but if it did, it's because it needs you. And that means you can hurt it. Angel, you have the power to do real good, to make amends. But if you die now, then all that you ever were was a monster. [Angel does not respond] Angel, please, the sun is coming up.
Buffy
I won't.
Do you think this is simple? You think there's an easy answer? You can never understand what I've done. Now go.
Buffy
You are not staying here. I won't let you!
I said leave! Oh, my God.
Buffy
No! No!
[they struggle] Am I a thing worth saving, huh? Am I a righteous man? The world wants me gone.
Buffy
What about me? I love you so much. And I tried to make you go away. I killed you and it didn't help. And I hate it! I hate that it's so hard. And that you can hurt me so much. I know everything that you did, because you did it to me. Oh, God. I wish that I wished you dead. I don't. [whispers] I can't.
Buffy, please. Just this once. Let me be strong.
Buffy
Strong is fighting. It's hard, and it's painful, and it's every day. It's what we have to do. And we can do it together. But if you're too much of a coward for that, then burn. If I can't convince you that you belong in this world, then I don't know what can. But do not expect me to watch. And don't expect me to mourn for you, because--
[Snow falls, blocking the sunlight.]
Buffy the Vampire Slayer · 894 quotes
