I need to speak with you... [notices Alan] ...privately.
Anything you want to say to me can be said in front of him.
We're married.
S3 E8Lincoln
S3 E9On the Ledge
[On the balcony]
When I was in law school, my dream wasn't so much the big trial as... well, I guess this. Having a drink at the end of the day with co-counsel, battle-weary, rehashing the day, discussing strategy. The whole socialization of lawyering that... well, until now, I've never experienced. It's a rich feeling, whatever it is.
It's called friendship.
[Jerry nods]
To friendship, my colleague.
[They click glasses in a toast]
[Renee and Alan run into each other]
RRenee
My apologies.
Renee, looking well.
RRenee
I'm glad. It's a goal.
Coping okay with your...tragic loss?
[on TV] It takes more than a stiff whack on the head to keep me down, folks. Trust me, I get hit harder during sex. I'm only sorry this creepo didn't have at me with a shovel during sweeps.
[turns the TV off] I knew I should've plunked her a second time! I just knew it!
Are you telling me you're the one who assaulted her?
I say that in confidence, of course.
[about Shirley] Are we really sure she's missing? Sometimes old people just slip off to have some work done.
[Jeffrey glares at her]
My murder case went away. You've still got yours. It just doesn't seem fair.
Nutty Lincoln didn't whack the judge?
Ready?
I'm ready. I actually feel... calm. Of course, I'm medicated but... [smiles at his own joke]
From the first moment I saw you, do you know what I wanted to do?
Pave my driveway?
I wanted to suck on your right earlobe. I'm sure people tell you you have soft, supple lobes.
It gets old.
Is mocking me really an exercise of your most sound judgment, Shirley? After all, I do have in my possession a loaded firearm.
Let alone a ukulele.
Right on my balcony.
It is not what you think.
I saw you. I heard you.
We were just talking.
[Denny storms from the room]
Oh dear.
Denny, where is that doll?
The police took her in for questioning.
Shirley Schmidt-ho?
She'll be back.
[to Lincoln] We all live our lives on a ledge. And it takes surprisingly little to push us over.
Lincoln! Suck...my...lobe.
Have you seen Shirley?
Naked?
Lately. She's missing.
S3 E10The Nutcrackers
I suppose we better work this out.
BBrad
Does it have to be now?
Well, it is the season. Peace on Earth...love for your fellow man...
BBrad
Wait. What was that?
"Love for your fellow man"?
BBrad
No, before that.
"Peace on Earth"?
BBrad
Liberal. I knew it!
I think we've just had our first three-way.
It didn't look like Shirley enjoyed it as much as we did. You know, she tasted differently than I remember...
[chuckles] That's because it was my slobber on her mouth, Denny. We've finally exchanged bodily fluids.
[quickly downs his glass of wine] Blech!
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