Top Chef quotes

[to Stephen] How are you doing, Brian?

Stephen?

[of her Elimination Challenge dish] It looked like a bomb exploded on my plate.

[of the other chefs judging his food] I don't care whether the other chefs express their opinions about my food. If the food is good, say it's good. If the food is crap, flip the plate.

Stephen is a sommelier so he's a professional bullshitter.

I'm bringing something to the competition that other people aren't bringing, you know, it's the ability to move your bowels with vegetables.

What the fuck did I come over here for?

[to Tom Colicchio] I speak my mind, that's the way I am.

C'mon guys! Allez! Allez!

I love you dawg!

[chuckling] Schmuck.

[of Miguel's reaction to guest judge Madame S] Miguel, of course, was like 'Aw, she's so hot!' And I'm like, Miguel, you have to get out of the house a little more.

[referring to Andrea's dessert] Now is this low-cal?

Yes, there's no butter, there's no saturated fat.

Everything is organic?

Everything is organic, right down to the chocolate.

[tasting her dessert] Needs butter.

Aren't all desserts really sexy? I mean, have you ever seen a fat person eat a cream puff? I mean, that's like watching somebody having sex.

Tom Colicchio

Are those condoms hanging out of your pocket?

Oh yeah, absolutely Chef. I always go to the kitchen protected.

[referring to the QuickFire Challenge] Everybody starts digging in and there are all these chefs like chop-chop-chop-chop-chop-chop suey all over the place, and I'm looking at this basket of fruit and I'm like, I just really want to put the basket of fruit exactly as it is on the table.

[to Madame S] I would love to serve you.