Jonas Venture Jr. quotes from The Venture Bros.

Jonas Venture Jr.

But we're the Venture Brothers! Shouldn't we work together?

Unh. What does it take to get rid of you, you parasite? Tweezers and a match? I give you life, I give you half my stuff, I gave you the X2 for God's sake, what more do you want?! My blood? Here! Take it! Take my blood! [bends over, pointing his rear towards Jonas Jr.] or better yet, just climb right on back inside me! [pats rear] Go on! Jump back in there! Come on!

Jonas Venture Jr.

[sighs] Fine. Never mind. Just let me get my stuff from the lab and I'll go.

'The lab'? Try my lab.

Jonas Venture Jr.

Mine, yours. What's the difference? We're the Venture Brothers! What's mine is yours.

Yeah, yeah. You're very generous with my things.

Jonas Venture Jr.

Hey fellas, if I can get you to gather in the next room for a moment, I like to... What is this? Are you selling autographs?

Like gangbusters. We made table-money in like the first five minutes.

Jonas Venture Jr.

You can’t do that here. You’re cheapening the memory.

Listen Pot-Noodle, we are the memory, OK. Now I saw your "suggested donation box" on the way in. So unless your giving us a cut at the door, I suggest you go rouse Spider-man and the Great Gazoo over there.

[On the other table] Look at them, ratting us out to the man. Cowards!

The Guild of Calamitous Intent is antagonist relations only.

Jonas Venture Jr

So who handles the good guys?

Whoa! (offended) I think the less hurtful term is protagonists.

Jonas Venture Jr

Oh. Yes. Sorry. Who handles the protagonists?

What, are you serious? OSI! Duh!

Jonas Venture Jr

Can you patch me through?

Oh, sure. (laughing) Just let me get my red phone! The hotline!

No, I'll shine the OSI signal!

No no, if we really believe, click our heels together and-

Jonas Venture Jr

Okay, okay! I get it! (hangs up)

Newbie. Did you see his creepy little body?!

Oh my god, when you were a kid, did you ever make G.I. Joe hump Rainbow Brite ?

Yeah.

He's what their kid would've looked like.

(holding out his hand) Jonas Venture Jr?

Jonas Venture Jr

(folding his arms) I am. And who are the dead men I'm speaking to?

That's a joke.

Regular cut-up.

Should give him a reality show.

I'd watch it.

I'd watch it twice.

Even if Flava Flav was in it.

We were just passing by and heard that you had a butterfly problem.

And you see, me and my associate here are amateur lepidopterists.

Jonas Venture Jr

Yoooooouuu want to see my stamp collection?

Only if we were philatelists.

Which we aren't, Mr. Smart Guy.