Master Billy Quizboy quotes from The Venture Bros.

(questioning why anyone would want to break into their trailer) It's industrial espionage, you've come to steal our great ideas. You've been foiled; we have none!

I fought an 8 year old, and the only reason I won is he tripped into a spike. I had my eyes closed the whole time - until I heard an 8 year old dying on a spike!

Professor, no offense, but that's just crazy! Violence isn't the answer. This is a think tank; we're the most powerful minds on the planet! Let's act like it!

Billy's right. We can create an antidote if we work together!

(pauses for a second to contemplate) Nah, my way's safer.

Alright, let's see them.

Dean

I don't want to show my junk to a little boy.

Oh, come on!

Dean

You said you wouldn't look!

I'M NOT LOOKING! Billy, fess up to the boy. He's been pulling that "Boy Genius" crap for at least the 20 years that I've known him.

Well, nobody is that impressed with "Master Billy Quizboy ADULT Genius."

Like a speech impediment and growth hormone deficiency qualifies you as a "BOY Genius."

Don't forget the huge head!

Hey! I copped to it! Now you guys are just ganging up on me! Can we just do this please?

Well, what happens if we wait?

That's not so good. My guess is that in a couple of hours, your son's testes are going to die, then atrophy.

Think raisin, or better yet, you know when you're eating peanuts, and you crack one open and the little nut is all dark and crammed into one corner...

You're finished, right? As for untwisting them, I don't know which way they spun.

Unless you're that guy from INXS and that's, like, your thing, the pain would be excruciating.

Don't look at me! I have not lived enough for I have not tasted the flower of a woman.

What do you mean?

You haven't tasted a flower? Is that a direct metaphor?

Because I don't take many trips down south myself.

You guys are disgusting. No, I mean I haven't sampled the fruits of the fairer sex.

What's with the poetry Wordsworth? Just say it. Say I am a virgin!

I knew it!

Billy, that makes you the best canidate to take a ray blast. You have nothing to lose. You've never done anything. The way I look at it, it's not even murder. It's a very late abortion.

Well at least you hit this time. Anything happen?

Nah. Nothin'. I told you the phosphates were too old.

No... It worked. You shrank my lungs!

Woah! Rusty!! Hoo, man!!!

White, I can't breathe over here!!

It's gonna get worse! You remember that sound my chair made a second ago? That wasn't the chair.

It'll be over there in a minute, Billy. Oh, think deviled eggs.

I hate you guys...

(about Billy's hand) How'd that happen anyway?

That's an excellent question. I have no idea.

Really?

No, I'm joking. But seriously, don't lift anything for a while... because your arm could fall off.

[reading] "Notice of hostile takeover"? Venture— what a dick! Wait, we're not even a publicly traded company.

Oh, FYI, I issued some shares back when we needed cash for the Nintendo Wii.

White, I just remembered something...

What?

Everything...

...You saw what he said, he’s not in the Guild of Calamitous Intent. It’s like a businessman’s club or something.

That’s what they said about the Bilderberg Group, son… and then whammo! Berlin Wall comes tumbling down.

No it hasn’t.

Oh, it will, kiddo. It was decided at the last meeting.

Brock

Just keep it up, Billy. We're getting some excellent intel out of you!

What intel? I've been here a day! I haven't done any spying yet!

Sure you have! That new eye of yours? It's actually a 3-D laser-matrix holographic camera! (indicating Billy's mechanical hand) And this little pud puller stores all the data!

You guys wired me?

Are you kidding? Why, you're a walking wire! And right now, you need to walk back in there and do you God-given duty! There are no free hands in this business, son!

But that's cheating!

Cheating is what the spy business is all about, boychik. Why, if we don't keep our eyes on our neighbor's paper, the baddies get the bomb and the whole world goes kablooie! You keep thinking you're here on the G.I. Bill or something, kid? YOU ARE NOT HERE TO WRITE ESSAYS! You're not even in college! You are in the Office of Secret Intelligence, you damn, dirty, crybaby FREAK!

Ahh! Young Mr. Wheylen! Do find a seat quickly, Quizboy. I was trying to teach your more punctual peers.

Sorry Professor... Fantomos. I had trouble finding the building.

Yes, yes. It’s a great big new world for you! And Mr. Quizboy I heard you were recently exonerated, but allow me to impress one thing upon you, we do not tolerate cheating at State University. The punishment, is severe!