London quotes from The Suite Life of Zack & Cody

London

[about to try to make breakfast cereal] Which goes first, the milk or the cereal?

Zack

It doesn't matter; as long as you remember the bowl.

Muriel

My doctor says I should stay away from chocolates... and younger men.

London

Aren't you supposed to be working?

Muriel

What's your point?

London

So Todd really wanted to kiss me?

Maddie

No, he wanted to kiss the plant!

London

Why would he want to kiss the plant?

Maddie

He doesn't. He wants to kiss you!

London

So Todd really wanted to kiss me?

Maddie

It's a special night. Don't make me slap you.

Maddie

How would you feel if people were spreading rumors about you?

London

Hey, every time I'm in the paper, my social life just gets better and better.

Maddie

Yeah? Well, my social life is going down the tubes because Chuck heard your lie and dumped me!

London

Oh, honey, I heard a rumor he was gonna dump you anyway.

Maddie

I didn't even know that woman was a reporter.

London

Oh, so you just gossip about me in general?

Maddie

Only because you gossiped about me, and it spread through the whole hotel.

London

Well, you gossiped about me, and it spread all over the world.

Maddie

But you started it!

London

Nuh-uh!

Maddie

Uh-huh!

London

Oh, don't you uh-huh my nuh-uh!

I think you are both at fault here. And I think we can all learn something from this. Even though gossiping is an irresistible temptation, on any level, gossip is hurtful. Now the best way to not spread it is to not listen to it.

London

Don't worry. I'll get us in there to see him rehearse. After all, he's a celebrity. I'm a celebrity. We're first celebrities once removed.

You go in there and you'll be removed.

London

[picking up a chess piece] Maddie, what are these do-hickeys? Are they expensive, and do I want to buy them?

Maddie

No, these are chess pieces. It's a game that's been played for 500,000 years.

London

Well, then, someone should have won already.

Maddie

There's no such thing as ghosts.

London

Wrong, as usual. I've seen this ghost. It was so scary, I dropped my new purse. And left it there!

Maddie

With money in it?

London

Oh, just the regular $1,000 bill every kid gets for an allowance... [Maddie, Zack and Cody suddenly bolt for the elevator.] Hey! Just 'cause I don't need it, doesn't mean it's not mine.

Maddie

[after receiving London's gift, a badly knitted sweater] But I wanted a car... that would keep all of me warm.

London

I made it with my own two hands.

Maddie

It looks like you made it with your own two feet!

London

I thought you'd be happy that I put so much effort into it. You're always accusing me of being superficial.

Maddie

And you had to pick Christmas to become deep?

London

It's just there are so many beautiful things out there to buy. How can you possibly resist them?

Maddie

I have no money.

London

Well, some of us aren't that lucky.

Speaking of all day shopping, I just received a fax from your father. He feels you've been spending too much money.

London

That's ridiculous! I'm saving him money. Ivana's contact lenses? Second pair free!

London, I'm afraid your father is adamant.

London

I thought his name was Wilfred.

...Yes, it is! What I'm saying is that he wants you to limit yourself to just buying the necessities. Good luck with that!

Maddie

[looking at the fax] You know your dad seems pretty serious this time.

London

What makes you think that?

Maddie

Well he's capitalized and underlined "disinherit."

London

[gasps] The "D" word!? [to Ivana] Don't worry snookums. Mommy won't let that happen to you.

Maddie

Oh please. You couldn't go one hour without shopping.

London

I can so! I can do anything! After all, I am the daughter of Adamant Tipton.

Maddie

Wilfred.

London

Whatever.

Maddie

All right, all right. I'll help you. Give me your credit cards. [holds out her hand to accept them. London gives her one.] Mmmhmm... [London gives her another.] Mmmhmm...[London pulls a wallet full of credit cards out of her purse and gives it to Maddie. Maddie takes them and they all fall out.]

London

Take care of my babies. They like to be taken out twice a day.

Good, London, good. Now give us a snobby look.

London

I have about twenty different ones. Which one do you want?

One that says "Only I can afford these clothes!"

London

Ooh! Number seven! One of my favorites!

Perfect. Now, that is a wrap!

London

Actually, it's a really shiny scarf!

London

[to Maddie] Well, that was your mistake!

Maddie

Well, your mistake was taking on Madeline Margaret Genevieve Miranda Catherine Fitzpatrick!

London

Fine! Stay in! I'll...beat all of you!

Maddie

You're going down!

London

You're going downer!