[dressed as Commander Nick Fox] Attention, all crew. Get to an evacuation pod. As for me, I'm going down with the Andromeda. [salutes] It's crew before commander on this ship. BRACE FOR IMPACT!! [to the viewers] Don't worry, I'm not really dead. [stands up] Tonight is Halloween, and I'm just getting into character. I'm going as Commander Nick Fox. He's the star of an old sci-fi movie that me and my friends are obsessed with… Planet Protection Patrol…or as we call it, Triple-P. It's about a group of space soldiers who protect the earth from evil aliens. We're each going as a member from the crew. I picked the commander because we're a lot alike: Handsome, daring, ready for anything!
LLucy
[opens the door, dressed as a skeleton, accidentally knocking him over] Apologies, Lincoln, but we need you to test out the haunted house.
LLucy
[looking at the photo Leni just took] Ugh, this is ghastly. Lincoln wasn't scared at all.
Yes, I was. I'm still shaking in my commander boots.
[dressed as a black cat; glancing at the photo] Lincoln, you're literally yawning in the photo. [reveals the photo, showing Lincoln yawning as Luna, dressed as a zombie, bites his head]
'Cause I was so tired of being scared! [then realizes his sisters aren't buying it] Okay, you're right. It's just, you always do the fog up the stairs thing, and Luan was Mr. Coconuts three years ago, and you two are always black cats. It's just, I've seen it all before.
LLucy
We need to make some spooky adjustments and fast. We can't be anything less than terrifying. I won't stand for it.
LLucy
Hey, Lynn. I have my crystal ball out. Do you wanna see your future?
Yeah. Thanks, Luce, but I already know exactly what it's gonna look like. I'm gonna be triple sport pro-athlete, have five championship rings, three deodorant commercials, two Christmas movies, and my own cereal: Crunchy Junk. Yep. I've gotten it figured out.
My future is terrible! I'm not really on the team! I'm Crikey's personal sweat wiper!
LLucy
Don't worry. It's possible my crystal ball isn't accurate.
[carrying a big trophy] That glass ball is 100% accurate, Lucy! I did end up winning the pageant after everyone else got food poisoning. Thanks again for the reading. [walks off to her room, next door]
Told you! My future is gonna be messed up for sure! I bet this is all because I missed practice today for that dentist appointment! Who cares about plaque anyway?!
Don't panic. This isn't necessarily your future. It's always evolving.
Darn straight! I'm gonna make sure it evolves the way I want it to. Time to start practicing.
[frantically runs out of her and Lucy's room to Lisa and Lily's room; off-screen] Lilster! Wanna hang?
[off-screen] Lynn, she's asleep!
[Lily starts crying after Lynn wakes her up]
[off-screen] Not for long!
[Lincoln is playing a game of Settlers of Cat-Land outside in driveway with his five younger sisters while waiting for their cousin Shiloh to arrive]
I'm so excited Shiloh's hanging out with us today! I hope he gets here soon.
[Uncle Lance's car soon pulls up]
[hops out of the car and skates towards his cousins; happily] Hey, guys!
LLucy
Glad to see you, cousin.
Thanks for letting me hang here today. I didn't want to go to my mom's hot yoga class. It smells funny.
[Lana lifts up her left arm, smelling her stinky armpit and sighs]
[annoyed] Well, doesn't smell much better here, [gladly] but we're happy to have you.
LLucy
[reading an amendment while taking possession of Lincoln's lamp] "Any hand-me-down not being properly cared for can be claimed by the next sibling in the Line of Succession." This light is covered in dust. [blows the dust off the lamp, which then covers her brother all over]
[hears Lola screaming, runs into the bathroom and finds her and her twin playing tug-of-war over Rita's old bathrobe; takes the robe out of their hands] What the heck is going on in here?!
Lola is trying to steal Mom's old robe from me!
It can never become yours to begin with! You know French terry is my favorite fabric!
Well, I'm two minutes older than you, so I was next in line!
[sticks a yellow sticky note on her twin's nose] That's a "Use It or Lose It" amendment I found. And since you don't even bathe, it gives me the right to TAKE THAT ROBE!
[takes the note off her nose and throws it on the floor] I don't care about your stupid rules! I'm keeping it!
[Lincoln then hears Luna and Luan fighting in their room]
[as Luan runs out of their room, carrying a leather jacket; angrily] That's my leather jacket, dude! Leni passed it down to me! [chases after her]
Yeah, but this amendment says that disrespecting an item is grounds for forfeiture!
[Morning at the Loud House… A rooster cock-a-doodle-doos and falls off the roof when Lynn Sr. suddenly starts sneezing loudly while coming down with a cold, and the siblings bolt out of the house]
I heard Dad sneeze! Get inside! [quickly closes the door as her siblings dash inside her apartment]
Ugh. Dad is the worst when he gets a cold. He turns into such a baby. [to Lily] No offense, Lily.
[shrugs; not caring] Mmm.
Okay, guys, don't panic. We can all stay here until Dad is well again. [grabs her bag] I'll run to the grocery store and get supplies, so we can hunker down. [opens the door, ends up bumping into Rita as she appears and falls on the floor]
There you all are. Listen, your dad is a bit under the weather, and I have to get to work. I need you to take care of him till I get home. [the siblings all groan in dismay] I know he can be a little… dramatic when he's sick. [cringes as her husband sneezes loudly]
[off-screen; weakly] I can't feel my face.
All you have to do is make sure he hydrates and rests.
Thanks, kids. I appreciate it. [leaves]
We can do this, guys. As long as we work together… [catches Lola trying to bail by sneaking out the window] Uh, Lola, no sneaking out the window.
[Lola closes the window and grumbles in annoyance; The siblings enter the master bedroom where their father is lying in bed with a red stuffy nose, an ice pack on his head, and a stack of used tissues in a trash can sitting next to him]
[sniffles the mucus in his nose and groans] Who's there? Are those my children?
It's okay, Pops. You've just got a cold.
Oh, thank you kids for trying to give me hope. I know how bad it is. [sadly writes a will]
[takes the book out his hands] Oh, for the Oath of Hippocrates. [takes out a thermometer] Father, I am going to prove you're overreacting. Open up. [Lynn Sr. groans as she sticks the thermometer in his mouth, then checks her watch] See? 98.7 degrees. You're fine.
[gasps in shock] Fine?! Normal is 98.6! I'm burning up! Can someone make me some toast and tea, please?
[approaches the garage and sees Lucy and Lisa dancing] Whoa, what's up with you two?
Luna played her number for us, and it really got my gluteus moving to the maximus!
LLucy
Gasp. Is this what it feels like to be... alive? [dances in a background of a blue sky with a sun and flower with cute faces; snaps herself out of it and shudders, feeling dizzy, and runs off inside] I need to go lie down in my coffin for a while.
If Luna's act is good enough to give Lucy a pulse, our act isn't gonna cut it, toots!
You're right! We need a new angle.
The Loud House · 632 quotes
