Raj quotes from The Big Bang Theory

Are you saying that you don't believe two people fall in love?

Of course they do. It's just that what people call "love" is actually a series of biochemical reactions in the brain, that fade over time.

Yes. Like the old song "When a Man Has a Biochemical Reaction For a Woman".

Raj, we're scientists. We don't need to feel threatened just because we understand the mechanisms that give rise to romantic feelings. It doesn't take anything away from the experience.

Yes, it does. Actually, it takes everything away from it. Love isn't just science, okay? It's spiritual. It's an acknowledgement of a mystery that's greater than ourselves. It's what makes people write songs, and poems, and what has kept The Bachelor on TV for twenty-one magical seasons.

Don't you think the fact that love is given away as a prize on a game show slightly undermines your argument?

Uh, yes. But I've never missed an episode, and I dare science to explain that.

Penny

Hey. What are you guys doing?

Uh, we have a bunch of Bitcoin on an old laptop, and it could be worth, like, a lot of money.

Penny

What-- You're kidding.

Leonard

No. We-we could be sitting on a fortune.

Penny

Okay, let the record show, I did not marry you for money, but you just got way more attractive.

Howard

Well, this party's a disaster.

Don't blame the party! You know how many favors I had to call in with my bounce house guy to get Wonder Woman?

Howard

Is that Wonder Woman?

Technically, it's a Chinese knockoff called Happy Strong Swimsuit Lady.

I'm Rajesh Koothrappali. Thank you for taking a walk with me... through the stars.

Leonard

That pause seems to get longer every time.

Howard

I do believe... you're right.

[Showing a picture on his phone] It's me in bed with a beautiful woman, and my watch showing the time as 2:30 AM.

Leonard

So, State's Exhibit A?

Sheldon

I just learned some distressing news. Amy sometimes doesn't do things because it would hurt my feelings.

Howard

First of all, it's not sometimes, its always.

Second, it's not just Amy, it's everyone.

Howard

And third, it's not news, it's well established.

[relaxing in Howard's jacuzzi] Oh, this is the life. What could be better than this?

Howard

If you weren't wearing one of my swimsuits.

I'll give it back.

Howard

You know the rule. Once it touches heinie, it's no longer miney.

You're such a prude. Do you know all the things this water's touching right now?

Howard

[getting out] Well, I'm relaxed enough.

If Bruce Banner is driving a rental car and turns into the Hulk, do you think it's covered, or does he need to add the Hulk as an additional driver?

Howard

You really need a girlfriend.

Oh, my God! This tomato is amazing! I can eat it like an apple.

The secret is I fertilze it with my own manure.

Howard

The look on your face.

Leonard

It's a sort of grin. You wanna know which kind?

Penny

Now we got a lot of family coming in tomorrow. I'm gonna need everyone's help. Think of this as one of your comic book movies. There's a bunch of superheroes, each with a different task.

Oh, like the new Avengers

Bernadette

Which one was that?

Howard

The one you slept through last weekend.

Bernadette

Ah. That was a good nap.

Amy

I think it's more like, uh,... like Lord of the Rings, and you're the Fellowship. Someone's gotta go to Gondor, someone's gotta go to Mordor, someone's gotta hold off the Demon of Shadow and Flame.

Leonard

You mean the Balrog?

Amy

I mean my mother.

Bernadette

"I heart New York". Aw, the baby's gonna love throwing up on this.

Sheldon

it doesn't have to just be New York. That's the beauty of it. Uh, the initials "NY" can stand for anything you like. For instance, I understand that there is an elderly rock-and-roll musician named Neil Young. Perhaps you heart him. [pause] Or if not him, Egyptian table tennis silver medalist Noha Yossry. Or Nana Yamaguchi, the Japanese voice actress who starred in Sally the Witch.

Did you just Google the initials "NY"?

Sheldon

I had Wi-Fi and a long plane flight. Draw your own conclusions.

If Tam knows what he did, we can just ask him. He's gonna be on campus tomorrow showing his son around.

Leonard

Won't that make Sheldon mad?

Everything makes Sheldon mad.

Howard

Yeah. Look at his list. Jim Henson for, quote, "putting a terrifying, giant yellow bird on television and in my nightmares."

Leonard

Oh, my God, you look amazing.

[dressed as "Kuth" Bader Ginsburg] I find you guilty of murder, because you are killing it!

Howard

[imitating Sheldon] Well, technically, the Supreme Court wouldn't determine a defendant's guilt or innocence in a criminal matter. They could only reverse or revamp a jury's conviction based on a constitutional or statutory issue.

Sheldon

[seeing Leonard and Raj laughing] Why are you laughing? His statement was factually correct.

Hey, don't freak out, but I think there's someone in your playhouse.

Howard

Oh. Yeah, that's just Bernadette. She's been hiding out in there all week.

Really? Why?

Howard

I don't know. She's been a little overwhelmed at work. And, frankly, me and the kids are a lot. She just needs some downtime.

And you just pretend like you don't know?

Howard

Sure. That's how marriage works. Three years ago, I told her I got life insurance, and I totally didn't. Someday, she's gonna find out. I'm gonna say, "Ha-ha! I know you've been hiding in the playhouse."

Amy

Are you really gonna plan a wedding in three months?

Yeah, well, her family's doing most of the work. They're amazing. We talk all the time.

Sheldon

Why?

Because we're about to get married and they're gonna be my family.

Sheldon

Amy and I are married, and I never talk to her family.

Penny

Really? My parents love Leonard.

Leonard

Yeah. And my mother loves Penny, which is weird, because I never knew she could love.