Jonas Quinn quotes from Stargate SG-1

Jonas

The possibility of being insane has been interfering with my ability to relax.

Col. O'Neill

I only agreed to bring that letter so I could see you.

Jonas

Why?

Col. O'Neill

Because Daniel is dying.

Jonas

And you're looking for someone to blame?

Col. O'Neill

I'm not gonna let you tarnish his name. See, I don't care what that stuff is worth, to anyone. My government will admit Daniel is guilty over my dead body.

Jonas

No offense, I'm just more interested in what's out there, through the Stargate.

Daniel Jackson

Well, all I can say is, whatever problems there are between your planet's nations, they will seem insignificant when you do find out what's going on out there.

Dr. McKay

What do you think the little alien guy's doing down there?

Maj. Carter

Bet you regret coming here now.

Jonas Quinn

Can't really look at it that way, can we?

Maj. Carter

So... what are you doing?

Jonas Quinn

You know, it's the stupidest thing, but it's been bugging me since I got here.

Maj. Carter

What's that?

Jonas Quinn

We're inside a mountain. The gate obviously can't fit through any of these doors...

Maj. Carter

So how did it get in here? The ceiling retracts. [She points] Above it is a shaft that leads to the surface, and inside is a crane mechanism that hoisted the gate down.

Jonas Quinn

Interesting. Does it go up?

Col. O'Neill

[suspiciously] Are you smiling?

Jonas

First time in a death glider.

Col. O'Neill

Oh! Well… [starts flying crazy]

Jonas

Those of us not originally from the planet Earth...got to stick together, right?

Teal'c

Are you suggesting an alien conspiracy?

Jonas

No...oh...Of course, yes. I...I was warned about your occasional use of humor. It'...Got me!

Jonas

No conspiracy!

Maj. Carter

Nice… lunch.

Jonas

Mmmm. I'm really starting to enjoy this "traditional American food".

Maj. Carter

We have another tradition. It's called "hardened arteries".

Jonas

Don't tell me you haven't noticed how strange the people have been acting around here.

Maj. Carter

What are you talking about?

Jonas

Well for instance, that man there right behind Teal'c, he doesn't realize it, but he just put eight cubes of sugar into his coffee, and that lady over at the counter, she's been reading the same article for half an hour. Since we sat down, that waitress has dropped her tray twice and the cook has done three wrong orders including my hamburger, which I ordered medium rare, but is in fact well done. It's like the whole town is half asleep.

Maj. Carter

How come you're not smiling?

Jonas

Should I be?

Maj. Carter

Well, it is your first time being captured by a Goa'uld.

Earthans!

Jonas

Uh… Earthlings. [looks at Teal'c] Sort of.

Maj. Carter

What was the command?

Thor

To come forth.

Jonas

You instructed every Replicator out there to come to you?

Col. O'Neill

I have a theory why you lost the war.

Maj. Carter

You only saw a flash of this creature. Are you sure it wasn't a hallucination?

Jonas

You're suggesting I'm delusional?

Col. O'Neill

No, no. it's just possible you were seeing something that wasn't entirely... Yes, that's what we're suggesting.

Jonas

How'd you learn to drive?

Teal'c

It was Daniel Jackson that instructed me.

Jonas

When was that?

Teal'c

I believe the year was 1969.

Teal'c

Are you able to translate any of this, Jonas Quinn?

Jonas

It's not Ancient but it's definitely a language belonging to one of the races of the Ancient alliance.

Col. O'Neill

Nox? Asgard?

Jonas

Furlings.

Col. O'Neill

Oh no, not those guys.

Jonas

What?

Col. O'Neill

Oh I don't know, I just can't imagine cute little furry things making big powerful weapons, that's all.

Jonas

I don't even know what they look like.

Col. O'Neill

Furling. Sounds cute and fuzzy to me.

Jonas

I'm thinking of asking her out.

Maj. Carter

Then you should.

Jonas

On Kelowna, it's custom for that request to be passed on by a friend. [punches Carter lightly on the arm]

Maj. Carter

Oh, it is not!

Jonas

You could at least find out for me if she'd be receptive.

Maj. Carter

Jonas, you are such a chickensh-- (The last part of the word is drowned out by the base's siren.)