A character in Stargate SG-1
Played by Amanda Tapping
Stargate SG-1 · 1,358 quotes
3rd most-quoted character in Stargate SG-1: in 349 of its 1,358 quotes
Most scenes with: Jack O'Neill (189), Daniel Jackson (103), Teal'c (34)
It is ironic that not so long ago the mere presence of the Goa'uld on Earth would have been cause for great concern.
Lt. Colonel CarterSeriously! Who'd ever think that we'd have bigger fish to fry? Or that you'd use the word "ironic" in a sentence?
[SG-1 is playing poker]
A true warrior...[pause] knows when to fold them.
Lt. Colonel CarterReally? I won? [laughs] I was totally bluffing!
A fictionalized, albeit slightly ridiculous version of Stargate Command is an excellent cover for the real thing in the event of a security leak.
Lt. Col. CarterPlausible deniability.
I'm sorry, sir, did you say "slightly" ridiculous?
You know, getting the cloaking generator off that mothership, that's going to be the least of our problems. Now, getting Jack to help, that's going to be the hard part.
Lt. Col. CarterOh, don't tell me…
Oh yes. He likes being invisible.
[Cut to a locker room with a shower running- after a pause, Carter cautiously looks out from over the top of the shower curtain]
Lt. Col. CarterSir? Are you there?
[Long pause]
Nope.
[The Stargate fails mid-dial; SG-1 look up to see Martin Lloyd shrug and excitedly wave them back up to the conference room.]
[whispering to Carter] Fix it.
Quickly.
Lt. Colonel CarterI'm on it. [leaves]
Indeed.
Lt. Col. CarterWe're running another diagnostic, but right now we're stumped. Power's getting through to the capacitors, but for some reason the charge isn't holding. That's causing the control crystal to send feedback into the interface and reset the programming code of the base computer's dialing protocol.
Whoa! That was awesome! Say that again!
Lt. Col. Carter...No.
Oh. Uh, everybody take five. I, I gotta get that down before I forget it. [to self] The power getting to the flux capacitor, but feedback is not feeding back into the feedback...face. This is gold!
[The Stargate is overloading with power.]
Lt. Col. CarterSiler, manually cut the power!
[Siler tries to and is thrown across the Gate room.]
[angry] Why does this always happen to me?
[Dan Shea, who plays Sgt. Siler is the stunt coordinator for Stargate SG-1 and stunt double for Richard Dean Anderson]
[After the Star Trek sequence.]
Hang on.
What?
One, that's Star Trek and two, it's ridiculous.
What's wrong with it?
Lt. Col. Carter"The singularity is about to explode?"
Yes.
Lt. Col. CarterEverything about the statement is wrong.
And how exactly is weapons at maximum going to help the situation?
The audience isn't going to know, but they love weapons at maximum.
Never underestimate your audience. They're usually sensitive, intelligent people, who will respond positively to quality entertainment.
I do not understand why everything in this script must inevitably explode.
Yo! Wonderbread! You got that address figured out?
Chill T! I'm like, translating as fast as I can!
I am so sick of being treated as an object to be worshiped! I am a real person with real feelings!
You know, I don't think Mitchell likes me anymore...
I'm pregnant.
[Cut to SG-1 in the conference room.]
Lt. Col. CarterUh-uh.
No.
[incredulous look] Nope.
[sullen silence]
I need a latte...
I'm pretty sure I have read all the reports recently.
Lt. Col. CarterActually you haven't read 30185.
30185? ... What's that?
We can't tell you.
What do you mean you can't tell me? I have the highest security clearance known to mankind! What–what is 30185?
Lt. Col. CarterWe were sworn to secrecy.
Well, why even mention it to me if you're not going to tell me what it is?
Lt. Col. CarterSorry.
Can you tell me?
Oh yeah, we can tell you.
Lt. Col. CarterWell, it has to do with the time that the gate sent us back to 1969.
Well, that can't have anything to do with me, I wasn't born 'til a year later.
Actually, it was nine months before he was born.
What?
Lt. Col. CarterYou have to remember, it was the Sixties...
C'mon, you have to have known that Jack's always taken an interest in your life.
Jack? ...O'Neill?
Indeed.
Lt. Col. CarterRemember when you were chosen for the 302 program even though you didn't think you should get in? How about when you were chosen for SG-1?
[laughing] Wait. Are you saying that Jack O'Neill is...
...my daddy?
All starting to make sense now, isn't it?
Awww, I'm being Punk'd, aren't I?
I'm talking about ...a twist; something nobody's expecting!
[walks in the door] You mean something like this?
Wow, I don't think anybody will see that coming.
Nope, there'll be spoilers.
Lt. Col. CarterAre you kidding? It'll be in the commercial.
[Carter was correct; the scene in which O'Neill appears was part of the commercial for "200"]
But we can protect him.
Lt. Colonel CarterYeah, by locking him away for the rest of his life.
What can ya say? There’s a downside to workin’ for super-villains.
What?
Lt. Colonel CarterNothin’. I just think it’s funny how you’re always losing your pants.
Y’know, I don't mind gettin’ shot, but I pulled a hammie when I took out that last Trust operative.
Lt. Colonel CarterAt least you didn’t lose your pants.
Jack O'NeillRichard Dean Anderson · 752 quotes
Daniel JacksonMichael Shanks · 433 quotes
Teal'cChristopher Judge · 180 quotes
Cameron MitchellBen Browder · 128 quotes
Vala Mal DoranClaudia Black · 90 quotes
George HammondDon S. Davis · 77 quotes
Jacob CarterCarmen Argenziano · 32 quotes
Bra'tacTony Amendola · 26 quotes
Hank LandryBeau Bridges · 25 quotes
Jonas QuinnCorin Nemec · 24 quotes
Martin LloydWillie Garson · 21 quotes
Ba'alCliff Simon · 17 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Stargate SG-1 pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.