Mystery Science Theater 3000 quotes

1930 total quotes


They got into port and everyone was okay.
They went out for lunch and felt better...


This is the song written for the train chase.
This is the chase, Rocky and Ken!
He tried to kill me with a forklift��
Olé!


We find him GUILTY! GUILTY!
G-U-I-L �� T-Y!
Guilty! Guilty!
G-U-I-L �� T-Y!
Whoo! Yaaaay!


Well, the next thing ya know, ol' Jed's really scared.
The kinfolks said, "Jed, get away from there!"
Said, "My cabin is the place I oughta be!"
So he loaded up his drawers and told his family.


When you see pink,
You're gonna think,

"We're doomed".
They are agents of Satan...

Joel: [laughing] Okay, stop it, Tom...

Within a matter of day-eeez,
All of our skin will fall off.


[As grain pours out of a spout]
Crow [as George]: I just saw a finger!
Mike: Can we go home?

[In Balleau's "gallery", one of his victims is kneeling with his hands extended]
Mike [as Al Jolson]: [singing] Mammy! Mammy! I'd walk a million miles for one of your smiles!

[The carpet/alien is "devouring" a victim, who is obviously climbing into the prop's mouth]
Mike [as Alien]: Uh, if you could help me out by climbing in...
Crow [as Alien]: I can't believe I ate the whole thing!