Kahn Souphanousinphone quotes from King of the Hill

I could just stay home, order a bucket of chicken and watch Hee Haw; same thing [as going to the Hills' for dinner].

Put on shoes, hillbilly!

Where I come from we got this thing called karma. You do something bad, it come back and bite you in the ass! Big, white, stubborn ass!

(seeing the couch is moved outside) What did you do to my own couch?

Prepare your brain for razzle-dazzle!

Minh, come quick! It's finally happening! Bobby Hillbilly marrying hillbilly cousin. You owe me five dollars. In your face!

Buckley's Angel? Buckley's Angel! [runs by the trampoline] Oh, I'm so alone! I have to commute to Houston every day -- that city one big stinkhole! Did I make the right decision, Buckley's Angel? Oh, Buckley's Angel! Why you not come to me instead of that redneck little hot potato? Buckley's Angel? NOW!!! COME RIGHT NOW!!!

Yeah, yeah; Buddhist, whatever. Monks.

I use secret Asian watering technique! I could spit in a thimble and water Central Park.

Yes, hello. Rock on.

Chaos already ruling. This like when city of Luang Prabang fall, and we snag sweet diplomatic license plates!

I will now tell stories of my childhood in Laos. Growing up in the village, I had two chickens. One of these was named "Phouma." I don't recall the name of the other chicken. Sometimes I would put both chickens in the wheelbarrow. This was very funny.

Hey Hank Hill, I knew rednecks abandon cars and refrigerators, guess we can throw kids on the list too! Hahahaha!

Hank Hill

So are you Chinese or Japanese?

I live in California last twenty year, but, ah... first come from Laos.

Hank Hill

Huh?

Laos. We Laotian.

Bill Dauterive

The ocean? What ocean?

We are Laotian--from Laos, stupid! It's a landlocked country in Southeast Asia. It's between Vietnam and Thailand, okay? Population: 4.7 million.

Hank Hill

So are you Chinese or Japanese?

[groans]

Bobby Hill

Dad, look. Ladybird and Doggie like eachother.

Hank Hill

Of course they do, Son, they're neighbors. [to Kahn] Y'know, Kahn, I just found a breeding partner for my Ladybird. If you're interested in having a real American dog, I can give-

Hank Hill

What the hell?! Get him off! Get him off of her! [Hank grabs Kahn's watering hose and sprays Doggie and Ladybird]

[laughter] Your Ladybird, she real slut!

Hank Hill

Ladybird is not a slut! She is in heat. Her hormones have overwhelmed her natural modesty.

Hank Hill

For Pete's sake, would you tie up your dog?!

You tie your dog. She seduce my Doggie.

Hank Hill

That's ridiculous, Ladybird can only love another purebred Georgia Bloodhound.

You know what I think, Hank Hill? I think you're a narrow-minded redneck!

Hank Hill

Oh, I get it: Just because I'm from Texas, I gotta be some kind of redneck! Chinese and their stupid stereotypes...

Get off my property!