Madeline Bassett quotes from Jeeves and Wooster

Madeline Bassett

Oh, Bertie, what a beautiful night!

Bertie Wooster

[humouring her] Rather!

Madeline

All the flowers have closed their eyes....

Bertie Wooster

Really?

Madeline

And all the little stars have woken up. [sees rabbits in the garden, not comprehending that they're only pottery figures] Oh, look! The little bunnies — how still they are!

Bertie Wooster

Yes, yes, they are marvellously still, aren't they? Yes....

I don't care how spiritual Harold Pinker is, Madeline. I'm Stephie's guardian.

Madeline Bassett

You know he played cricket for Oxford?

I don't care if he played tiddlywinks for the Sorbonne.

Madeline Bassett

Oh, Bertie! I need someone to turn the pages for me.

Bertie Wooster

Right, well, I'll go and find someone, shall I?

Madeline Bassett

I'm furious with Augustus.

Bertie Wooster

Oh, surely not!

Madeline Bassett

He was so rude about Roderick.

Bertie Wooster

Never!

Madeline Bassett

He said to Daddy that he was sick and tired of seeing Roderick clumping about the place as if it belonged to him, and if Daddy had an ounce more sense than a billiard ball, he would charge him rent. He was most offensive!

Bertie Wooster

Well, h-h-he said it with a light laugh.

Madeline Bassett

No.

Bertie Wooster

Well, you might not have noticed it. Very easy to miss these light laughs.

Bertie Wooster

Oh by gee by gosh by gum by Jove!

Oh by Jove, oh by Jove, oh by Jove!

Bertie Wooster

Oh By Jingo, won't you hear our love?

Madeline Bassett

Will you kindly raise your voice?

Louder!

We will build for you a hut!

Yes!

You will be our favourite nut!

Correct!

Bertie Wooster

We'll have a lot of little oh-by-Joveses!

Jeeves

Dress them up in clogs and clotheses.

Bertie Wooster

Oh By Jingo said by gosh by gee!

G, A, B, C, D, E, stop!

Madeline Bassett

Oh by jiminy, please don't bother me!

Bother her, bother her!

Bertie Wooster

So they all went away, saying

Oh by gee by gosh by gum by Oh By Jingo, by gee, you're the only one for me!

Jeeves

Bring me lobster on a clean plate!

Madeline Bassett

[about Bertie] I think he's having a brainstorm!

What with?

Madeline Bassett

We should loosen his collar.

Jeeves

I hardly think such drastic measures are called for, Miss Bassett.