Gussie Fink-Nottle quotes from Jeeves and Wooster

Gussie Fink-Nottle

[playing the piano and singing horribly off-key while lisping] How do you feel / When you marry your ideal? / Ever tho goothey, goothey, goothey, goothey...

Gussie Fink-Nottle

So, you've won the Scripture Knowledge prize, have you, G.G. Simmons?

Sir, yes, sir.

Gussie Fink-Nottle

Yes, you look just the sort of little tick who would.

Bertie Wooster

What's all this about you not writing to Madeline?

Gussie Fink-Nottle

Madeline?

Bertie Wooster

Madeline! Do you realize she's started sending telegrams about it? For all our sakes, Gussie, write to her!

Gussie Fink-Nottle

I am not at all pleased with Madeline. It was she who made me come to this ghastly place. I only consented on the understanding that she'd come too. Then, at the last moment, she coolly backed out on the flimsy plea that some school friend of hers needs her. She must be made to realize she can't do that sort of thing. So I'm not going to write to her. It's a sort of a system.

Bertie Wooster

Gussie, for the last time, will you or will you not immediately compose an eight-page letter breathing love in every syllable and post it to Madeline?

Gussie Fink-Nottle

Not!

Gussie Fink-Nottle

But it's absolute balderdash, Bertie. I mean, listen to this: "Sure and begorrah, I don't know what's after being the matter with you, Michael." I mean, what on earth is this "what's after being" stuff mean?

Bertie Wooster

My dear old Gussie, that is how people think Irish people talk.