Hannibal quotes from Histeria!

Loud Kiddington

Howdy, Carthaginians! Loud Kiddington here! And if I can't make you a deal, my dog Fetch'll eat a buffalo chip!

Fetch

Say what?!

Loud Kiddington

Yes sir, it's a giant year-end beast of burden blow-out! Check out these savings! Here's a nifty model - take a test drive on the all-new Lipizzaners!

Wussies!

Loud Kiddington

Or for rugged terrain, try our four-by-four all-weather oxen!

Puny!

Loud Kiddington

Or for something even tougher, we can fix you up with your very own Teamsters!

Disgusting!

Miss Information

And to our right is the great Cathaginian general Hannibal...

That's Mr. Hannibal to you.

Miss Information

...who is plottin' a surprise invasion on Rome itself.

Would somebody call security?!

It's not snack time! I want your opinion.

Toast

Oh, well, I'd lose the hat, dude. It reeks.

No, not my wardrobe! If you were going to invade Rome, which way would you go?

Toast

[stares at the map and turns it upside-down] Uh... let's see...

[points to map] It's right here!!

Toast

Oh, right, gotcha. Uh... okay, I would go, like, uh... this way?

Of course you would! Because you have the I.Q. of a fence! Which is precisely why we will go through the Alps, and invade from the North instead! Assemble the troops!

Toast

Woah, check me out! I'm like, a military strategist. That's pretty cool, huh?

Father Time

In 218 B.C., Hannibal finally reached the Italian border.

Prepare to meet the wrath of the great Hannibal, you Roman dogs!

It's Loud Kiddington and his dog, Fetch!

Now what?!

Loud Kiddington

Howdy, Hannibal!

Fetch

Your lease on the elephants is up, and you've exceeded your mileage!

Huh?

Loud Kiddington

That'll be 10,000 dinari!

Fetch

Payment due!

[laughs] I'm Hannibal! The greatest general the world's ever known! I don't pay bills! Now get out of my way before I turn you into roadkill!

Loud Kiddington

Have it your way! [He claps his hands twice, causing the elephants to sling their riders into the dirt. Loud and the Kid Chorus taunt them from atop an elephant.] So long, deadbeats!