Gordon quotes from Hell's Kitchen

Mush. [returns to workstation] All of you! ALL OF YOU!

Yes, chef!

Taste that! Quick!! It's like baby food, it's mush! Janai, it's overcooked!

Yes, chef.

Not by two minutes, but by ten minutes!

Yes, chef.

(interview) Janai... "Fuck, fuck, FUCK," is all I have to say! You're creating baby food! It looked like shit coming out the fuckin' blender!

STOP! [throws spoon] STOP! Time-out! Time-out! Marino!

Yes, chef.

Get in here. You're Italian, taste that fucking shit risotto. [Marino takes a bite of the risotto]

Mushy.

Overcooked lobster tail, overcooked scallops, and mush risotto.

(Interview) My hands are shaking right now.

(Interview) Holy shit!

All of you, come here, yeah all of you. All of you, all of you. Get the fuck out. [sends the red team to the storage room]. Get in there! Get in there! [slams the storage room door]. Have a fucking meeting, and sort it out. When you walk back in that kitchen, if anyone hasn’t gotten their shit together, GAME OVER!

Yes, chef!

How long?

Is it already done?

(to Sterling) The halibut's ready!

I'm not ready yet! Give me three minutes tops, man! Three minutes!

Fucking hell.

I'm walking in one.

Three minutes, man! I'm not serving that!

Then you better plate...

THREE MINUTES!

...and shut the fuck up!!

Three minutes!

Whoa, whoa, whoa! (to Steve) Listen! Fucking pay attention! Pay attention to what's going on!

(to Steve) Why would you send it up when my food ain't ready, man?

(interview) Really, guys? Really? It's not a measure of how big your cock is. Just put your food out!

Blue team! Two halibut, two lamb!

Walking with the halibut!

Lamb walking!

[to Gordon as he brings fish to the pass] Two halibut.

Lamb! [Sterling doesn't respond] No answer. LAMB!!

Lamb is one minute off! It's too rare, chef!

One minute off?! Oh my God!

That was too rare, but I got one! I got one ready! By the time I cut this, I'll be ready!

Go! COME ON!

(to Sterling) If it's not good, don't slice it.

It's good!

Wait, check. Check it. Check first. It's raw! Don't slice it more! Just put it back!

(interview; facepalms) Oh, no. What have I done now, man?

(to Sterling) Hey, you! FUCK-WIT! Come here, you! Get me the fucking lamb! Get me the lamb!

Fuck.

ALL OF YOU, COME HERE!! HURRY UP, FERNANDO! [places raw lamb next to the halibut] Look how we are reverting to cooking.

Fuck! [slams fist]

[throws fish onto the floor] SHIT!! HEY, ALL OF YOU! CAN YOU SLOW IT DOWN AND GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER?!

Yes, chef!

All of you, come here! Two salmon, two wellington, one pork, one lamb. [points to the lamb] Shit lamb, and the pork's where?

It's rare, chef.

[points at every single member of the blue team] One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight fucking idiots! Fuck off! Get out! Pathetic! Out! OUT!

(Interview) Kalen, just keep the oven shut. You keep letting out the heat.

Stop opening the oven! Stop!

I need the proteins! MOVE! LET'S GO!

Lamb can walk, please!

[checks the lamb again] That's still raw! [walks back to workstation] What are we serving?!

Lamb.

(to Kalen) Get it back in the fucking oven!

Yes, chef.

It's so fucking raw, it's still got its wool on it!

Yes, chef!

MOVE!!

FRANK!

Yes, chef.

Get a grip, yeah?!

I got it, chef. (to Aaron and Santos) You ready to go?

No.

You ready to walk? I wanna see you walk.

No! Stop, Frank! They're not ready! They're three minutes out, Frank! You just gave him the chicken veg for three minutes out.

[spits out spinach after tasting it] All of you, come here! So Frank hits the window two minutes early! (to Frank) Just taste what you've given me. Taste that!

I just seasoned it!

Taste that. And what's the one thing it's missing?

Salt.

Salt and pepper, chef.

Frank! Frank! FRANK!!

Yes, chef.

Fuck off upstairs! GET OUT!

Yes, chef. (interview) Messing up, it's like... I don't know. It's like a monkey and a wrench. A monkey, a wrench and a monkey. Monkey and a... That's not right. Hold on.

WHAT IN THE FUCK IS GOING ON? The salmon is raw, and the chicken is as dry as a fucking camel’s asshole in the fucking desert storm! Look how stringy that is. (throws chicken)

Heard, chef.

Hey no, no, no, not heard (throws spoon). No, stop! That’s food leaving the kitchen expected to be served. No! No! No! No! (Slamming the raw wellingtons and overcooked chicken).

(interview) It feels like, I just took 1, 2, like 3 uppercuts straight to the gut.

Let me communicate something to you all: GET OUT! GET OUT!

(shocked) He’s kicking them out.

And so much for Wendy Williams being a source of inspiration. V.I.P.’s? You certainly didn’t treat them like V.I.P.’s. Pathetic! Absolutely pathetic.

(interview) Everybody's just like a bunch of slobs and a lot of fuck-ups! We really gotta get it together. [to the blue team] Coming up next! LISTEN TO ME, PLEASE! Coming up next! Listen to me, please! Coming up next: four florentines, one French toast from this side, one crepe! That's the next order, okay?

Finally, someone fucking organizing them [the blue team]!

(interview) Felt like I was doing orchestra. (singing) French toast, crepes, florentine. How long? French toast, crepes, florentine. How long? French toast, crepes, florentine. How long? (talking) It felt good, man!

Under conductor Sterling's masterful direction, the blue team gets back into harmony.

Let's cook and do it with a fucking smile, man!

Hey, Steve. Touch this, tell me what you think.

(to Steve) Hey! Why are you touching his meat?!

He asked, chef.

FRANK!

Yes, chef!

He's (Steve) up to his eyeballs in risotto, and he's touching JR's meat!

I don't know! I'm over here! I'm...Chef, we got it. I got it.

(interview) Frank is pretending like he's doing something when he's really not. Get it together or go home.

(to Santos) Halibut's cooked beautifully!

Thank you, chef! [bumps fists with Fernando] (interview) WOO-HOO!!

Hey, blue team! Come here! That halibut is cooked beautifully. Good job.

Thank you, chef.

(to JR) You didn't even fucking cook it! Why are you saying, "Thank you?!"

Because we're a team, chef.

What's funny?!

Nothing, chef.

Let me tell you something. The pork is fucking raw!

(interview) I told you to fucking–I... (sighs)

(to Frank and JR) Back together in the oven! [slams fist on table repeatedly]

(interview) Aw, man! Really?! I just put love into that thing!

JR, how long?!

One minute, chef!

Do we walk? You wanna walk?

SHUT UP! (to Santos) COME HERE!!

(interview) When Chef Ramsay says, "Come here," your heart just goes to your fucking feet.

What does V.I.P. mean?!

Very important person, chef.

Louder!

Very important person, chef!

LOUDER!

VERY IMPORTANT PERSON, CHEF!

LOUDER!!

VERY IMPORTANT PERSON, CHEF!!

SO WHY ARE YOU SERVING RAW FUCKING SALMON?! [points at Sterling] Overcooked! [points at Santos] Raw! What's next?!

Perfect!

One chicken, one lamb! HOW LONG?!

Coming in right now, chef. Chicken right here.

Lamb?!

Forty-five seconds on the lamb, please. (interview) I'm trying to come back. I'm gonna make sure that the lamb is cooked perfectly. Chef Ramsay is ready to explode at any moment.

[looks at the lamb] That looks like shit! [walks back to workstation] That's for Chris Bosh! Yeah, [throws spoon] fucking raw! Raw!

(interview) It's just like... Fuck!

(to JR) You, fuck off! Get out! (to Frank) You, GET OUT! (to Fernando and Santos) You two, FUCK OFF!

(interview) JR dropped the ball on the meat station. He fucked me, he screwed me over! He's the one that screwed up dinner service.

Sterling!

Yes, chef!

Get on meat!

(interview) What the fuck is going on?!

Steve, beet salad!

Yes, chef!

Soup?! Where's the protein? (interview) You're eating it, and it's like, "This could be anything. This could be anything, this could be anything!"

Hurry up! It's not lunch, guys!

Alright!

Let's go, man!

Come on!

[grabs scallop plate] Scallops!

Scallops, chef!

No!

Clams!

NO!

(interview) Your head's racing a mile a minute. You're just going nonstop, but I know it's gotta be something in the ocean. (to Gordon) Alligator!

NO! Alligator chowder? What?!

(interview; laughs) Time's a-tickin', fools. And you're fucking up!

Cod.

NO!

Fuck!

Monkfish!

NO!

Come on, guys! Taste, taste it! (interview) Boys, just taste it! Put it in your mouth! Come on!

(to Sterling; after tasting yet another meat) Squid. Come on.

COME ON!

(interview) Lord God, please hear my prayer.

Squid!

YES!

(interview) Can I get an amen?!

With two dishes remaining, Aaron's on his own to identify the alligator.

(to Aaron) We got this! Come on!

(interview) Oh my God. This is a really spicy dish. [to the blue team] It's so fucking covered up with shit!

That's a Cajun dish, man! It's alligator! Alligator! (interview) Man, I'm from the dirty South! That's alligator right off the damn dome, you know?!

Buffalo!

No!

Fuck!

Alligator, man! It's Cajun!

(interview) Sterling is yelling, "Alligator," but nobody is listening to him. I'm like, "Yes! This is the perfect time for you guys to ignore his ass!"

Chicken!

No!

FUCK!

No, alligator, man!

Come on!

Alright, Sterling! (interview) Sterling, I'm sure you're right right now! [to Gordon] Alligator!

YES!

(to Aaron) Thank you! THANK YOU! (interview) You ain't from the South if you can't recognize that shit there!