Lazy Susan quotes from Gravity Falls

Thanks there, sugar pot. I-I mean honey wasp, kitten baby, b-baby cow.

Lazy Susan

Ha! Silly.. silly man...

Mabel

What was that about?

Nothing. I don't want to talk about it. Talk about what? Why is this table wet?

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Wait. Wait. Stop everything. I’ve got something to say.

Blubs

Not this guy again.

Just wait! Look! You guys all think Gideon is so perfect and honest, "Oh. I can never tell a lie, I’m Gideon."

Blubs

He’s more honest than you.

DDurland

Yeah! And he’s psychic too.

How’s this for psychic? BAM! [kicks a metal stab revealing a control panel inside] Take a good look.

Lazy Susan

Wait a minute? Is that me? [on the monitor] The secret ingredient to my coffee omelette is coffee.

TToby

And me.

DDoctor

[on the monitor] I can verify that that birthmark is indeed disgusting.

EEveryone

That’s me! That’s me! That’s me!

That's right; these pins are hidden cameras! And my hearing aid was picking up the feedback! Who's the fraud now?

[Stan crushes the pin which indeed has a hidden camera inside. Everyone throws down their pins]

DDurland

Gideon, we gave you our trust.

MDManly Dan

You lied to us.

Please, I... It's not what it looks like. What are you gonna do with me?

DDurland

Tyler?

Tyler

Get him. [sniffs] Get him.

Blubs

Lil' Gideon, you are under arrest for conspiracy, fraud and breaking our hearts. Durland, the tiny handcuffs.

[Durland handcuffs him] What?! No!

Just one more thing!

[Stan picks him up and shakes him] Let go of me! Ow! Ow! Ow!

[retrieves Journal Number Two and the deed to the Mystery Shack] I believe this belongs to me.

[gets loaded into a police car] No! No! Watch the hair! You can't do this to me! Y'all are sheep! You need me! I'll be back! You'll hear from my lawyers!

SShandra

There you have it. Local hero Stanford Pines has just exposed Li'l Gideon as a fraud. Anything you have to say to the town, Stanford?

The Mystery Shack is back, baby!

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[As Bill Cipher towers over Gravity Falls and its citizens]

All right, listen up, you one-lifespan, three-dimensional, five-sense skin puppets! For one trillion years I've been trapped in my own decaying dimension, waiting for a new universe to call my own. Name's Bill. But you can call me your new lord and master for all of eternity.

[he melts the statue of Nathaniel Northwest]

Now meet the gang of interdimensional criminals and nightmares I call my friends. [as various creatures come out of the scar in the sky] 8 Ball. Kryptos. The being whose name must never be said. Haha, what the heck? It's Zanthar. Then, of course, there's also Teeth, Keyhole, Hectorgon, Amorphous Shape, Pyronica, Paci-Fire and these guys. This is our town now, boys! [all his friends start cackling out loud]

Mayor Tyler

Now see here, you unholy triangle fella! As mayor, I strongly urge you to git... git on out of here!

Lazy Susan

Yeah! Things with one eye are weird!

GGrenda

We don't like out-of-towners!

MDManly Dan

[ripping a mailbox in half] AND WE PUNCH WHAT WE DON'T UNDERSTAND!

NMr. Northwest

I would just like to say that as a rich capitalist, I welcome your tyrannical rule. Perhaps I could be one of your... Horsemen of the Apocalypse?

Pacifica

Dad!

NMr. Northwest

Not now, sweetie. The grownups are talking.

Oh, wow, that's a great offer. How 'bout instead, I shuffle the functions of every hole in your face?

[He clicks his fingers, and Mr. Northwest's face is suddenly grotesquely mixed up; he falls to the ground, giving out muffled screams as his family watches in horror; Bill cackles as people flee, and turns Deputy Durland to stone]

Sheriff Blubs

Durland! My precious Deputy Durland, no! [one of the "Eye-Bats" transports Durland away]

It's time we do a little redecorating! I could really use a castle of some kind! [causes a pyramid to form and float in the sky] And how about some bubbles of PURE MADNESS?! [summons colourful bubbles; one passes through Sprott, making him scream madly and rip his shirt apart] This party never stops! Time is dead and meaning has no meaning! Existence is upside-down and I reign supreme! Welcome, one and all, to WEIRDMAGEDDON!

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Ladies, gentlemen, that creature with like eighty-seven different faces.

CCreature

Eighty-eight different faces.

Whoa-ho, sorry. Touchy subject. Anyways, it's been fun turning Gravity Falls inside out, rounding up all its terrified citizens and then stacking them into this massive throne of frozen human agony. Don't worry, they're not conscious anymore... probably.

Lazy Susan

[groans, unfreezes] Uh, my omelettes. They... have friendly faces.

Whoops. Hehe, back, back you go there. [pats her back, she turns back into stone] But Gravity Falls is just the beginning. It's time to take our chaos worldwide! All right, boys, to the corners of the Earth! Set the world aflame with your weirdness! This dimension is ours! [the creatures fly out of the pyramid] Ah, global domination. I could get used to- [the creatures slam into the forcefield] WHAT?! [flies out and touches the forcefield] Hmm, this might be more complicated than I thought.

PFPaci-Fire

I think I broke something.

WALK IT OFF!