Blair Waldorf quotes from Gossip Girl

Serena

I still miss Dan sometimes... more than sometimes.

Blair

The only thing lamer than dating Dan Humphrey... is mourning Dan Humphrey.

Chuck

Please don't leave with him

Blair

Why ? Give me a reason and "I'm Chuck Bass" doesn't count !

Chuck

Because you don't want to.

Blair

Not good enough.

Chuck

Because I don't want you to

Blair

That's not enough !

Chuck

What else is there ?

Blair

The true reason, I should stay right where I am and not get in the car.... Three words, eight letters, say it. . and i'm yours.

Chuck

I... I...

Blair

Thank you, that all I needed to hear

Chuck

You really know how to hurt people. I admire you for it

Blair

This is all your fault. I wouldn't never needed a James if you hadn't stood me in the airport in the first place. You made me use him.

Chuck

I didn't make you do anything. You're just you. Don't you see we're the same? Stop trying to fight it

Blair

I will fight until my last dying breath because any resemblance of you is something i would hate about myself

Serena

And you really expect me to believe this isn't all about revenge on Chuck?

Blair

Revenge is so 12 hours ago! And just because Marcus is the perfect post-Bass palate cleanser doesn't mean he isn't a delicious dish in his own right!

Serena

This is you. Just be yourself!

Blair

[after being humiliated by Catherine] She made Waldorf rhyme with Spears! I may as well have gone commando and held my party at Nyla's Burger Basket.

Serena

Fine. While you stand here and feel sorry for yourself and denigrate the fine people of Kentwood, I'm gonna go find Dan.

Blair

Your plan to ruin me totally backfired. Turns out Marcus' mommy is even sicker than you are.

Chuck

You got along great?

Blair

I think she recognized herself in me. Or rather, I recognized someone in her.

Chuck

I don't follow.

Blair

All you need to know is, you lost. But don't be too hard on yourself. It was a solid effort.

Chuck

Tomorrow's another day.

Blair

Good night, Chuck.

Chuck

Good night, Blair.

Chuck

I thought you might like to meet my friend.

Blair

Why, so she can warn me about the effects of too much Botox?

Catherine

Blair, is it? I'm Duchess Beaton.

Blair

[flabbergasted] Duchess? Nice to meet you.

Blair

I know you're here with Chuck, and I can only imagine what he said about me. Limo sex, social torture, freshmen, blackmail. But I assure you, there's an explanation for all of it.

Catherine

Save your breath, Blair. Chuck didn't tell me a thing.

Blair

He didn't.

Catherine

I told him it didn't make any difference to me, because ... despite your best efforts, which are completely transparent, by the way, Marcus will never end up with a lowly Waldorf.

Serena

Well, if you can't find common ground with a dictator, I don't know who can.

Blair

Dan likes soccer, right? Or football, as Marcus calls it? Think it would be too weird if he came?

Serena

Not... necessarily ...

Blair

Good, you'll call him?

Serena

Does this mean you actually think Dan has a redeeming quality?

Blair

As long as knows his arse from his Arsenal, I think he's aces.

Blair

Squash? I'll squash you.

Chuck

It's just a game, Blair.

Blair

Not to me, Basshole. I like him!

Chuck

So do I. And apparently he doesn't have too many friends.

[sees Blair and Chuck] ... Blair!

Blair

ohmigod, ohmigod.

Blair

You don't understand! I thought it was you! He had an accent!

Chuck

Please, you knew exactly who it was.

Blair

Not that it's any of your business, but Marcus and I have an amazing sex life.

Chuck

Really? [pauses] What names does he call you when you make love? Where does he put his hand? Does he ... [whispers] I want you, baby. Won't you come to me?...Have sex with me .

Blair

What?

Chuck

Just once, that's all I ask.

Blair

You are disgusting and I hate you.

Chuck

Then why are you still holding my hand?

Chuck

Watching you fail spectacularly gives me so much joy.

Blair

And you know what you give to everyone, Chuck? Misery. There's a reason you're always out here alone.

Chuck

Nate just happens to be away at his grandparents'.

Blair

Nate's only friends with you out of habit. The only person with fewer friends than you is Dan Humphrey. And at least his lame, nineties dad likes him. And that's because he's something you'll never be, a human being.

Chuck

We both know you'll do it again. It's just a question of when.

Blair

The answer is never.

Chuck

We're inevitable, Waldorf.

Blair

What took you so long?

Chuck

If you thought that was long, you have no idea what you're in for.