Unlike the rest of us, sex lies and scandal never take a vacation. Instead, they take the Long Island Expressway and head east - to the Hamptons! Some of us would say summer is the busiest season. Think Park Avenue, but with Tennis whites, and Band de Soleil. The players change, but the game remains the same.
“Summer, Kind of Wonderful” · Season 2, Episode 1
In this episode: Blair Waldorf (9), Serena van der Woodsen (5), Chuck Bass (4), Gossip Girl (3), Dan Humphrey (1), Rufus Humphrey (1), Eric van der Woodsen (1)
Oh God. Hot lifeguard has a Camaro. And not in an ironic-I've-got-a-Camaro kinda way.
At least I could have gotten a more interesting stand-in than James. You know how hard it is to find a good fake boyfriend on short notice?
I would be in my cabana at the Hotel du Cap, and there he would be. Amid all the fireworks on Bastille Day, all I could see was that... Chuck Bass-tard!
You're lying.
I am not.
Your eyes are doing that thing where they don't match your mouth.
I wasn't aware that robots got jealous. Did they update your software while I was away?
What about all those rumors about you and Nate?
Mmm mmm. Not true. They just got people off my back so I could stop being sad, and Nate could go do whatever he wants, so it worked out for both of us.
You mean you haven't had ANY fun with anyone all summer?
There's this hot lifeguard that asked me out, but I, you know, I turned him down
A hot lifeguard is like kleenex! Use once and throw away. You couldn't ask for a better rebound!
Spotted: Serena and Nate in a massive display of PDA... and that's exactly what Dan Humphrey is. Pretty. Damn. Angry.
Is something wrong?
JJames
You're just using me to make that guy jealous.
I ...
JJames
It's no wonder you hate Charade. It hits too close to home.
Chuck is an awful person. He does terrible things. He uses people
JJames
And you think you're any different? I can't believe I've been so stupid. I bet you don't even like me at all.
Not really. I mean... you're kinda boring.
JJames
Am I? Or are you just too interested in yourself to get to know me? You two deserve each other.
I've tried not to think about her all summer. I was afraid that if I did, that ... I'd see that I made a huge mistake.
Well, you've been running all summer. Maybe it's time you turned around and faced it.
Damn that mother Chucker! He's totally right! I don't even like James!
Thank you. I was totally waiting for that.
[to Chuck] Yeah... 'How Well Do You Know Blair Waldorf' is a little boring to those of us who actually know Blair Waldorf.
Spotted: Chuck Bass waiting for the Jitney. A dozen roses in one hand, his heart in the other. You know what they say: A man is a good thing to come home for. But an even better thing to come home with. Ain't karma a bitch? We know Blair Waldorf is.
SOSkank on Beach
Mister Chuck, is there anything you need caretaking of?
Blair will never forgive you for what you did to her.
Who told you that little piece of advice, your boyfriend Nate?
Nate didn't say anything ...
Good. I don't think it's wise taking relationship advice from someone in a FAKE relationship. Call me crazy. [pause] Enjoy another night alone with your thoughts.
Good luck on your suicide mission!
I still miss Dan sometimes... more than sometimes.
The only thing lamer than dating Dan Humphrey... is mourning Dan Humphrey.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Gossip Girl pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.