I will take care of it from here. I have a trunk full of wedding magazines hidden under my bed. I'm thinking of a russet and cognac theme. Those are colours, Finn. Fall wedding colors.
“Furt” · Season 2, Episode 8
In this episode: Kurt Hummel (11), Finn Hudson (9), Rachel Berry (4), Santana Lopez (4), Quinn Fabray (3), Sam Evans (3), Burt Hummel (3), Will Schuester (2)
Long story short – you're having a Glee wedding!
So what do you want to talk about in private?
These galactic mobiles aren't the stars at McKinley. We are. Or at least I want us to be. I think I love you.
Oh.
Look, my shoulder's healed up and I'm going to be the quarterback again soon. And you're already the head cheerleader. [Bends on one knee and opens a box with a ring]
Oh my god, are you proposing? We've known each other for 6 weeks. Stand up. You're freaking me out.
I-I wanna marry you, someday. Until then, will you accept this promise ring?
What are you, 6?
[Stands up] If you accept, this ring will symbolize my promise to you to be true, to never pressure you to do anything more than kiss, to listen to your problems, to tell you when you have food in your teeth or eye gunk, to come over to your house whenever you need something super heavy to move around. I promise to make you feel proud when you walk down the hall and say, "That dude's my boyfriend." I promise to do all of those things without trying to sound like Matthew McConaughey.
[Laughs softly]
[Bends down on one knee again] I really care about you, Quinn and I want us to be together.
[Closes the box]
Is that a no?
It's a maybe. [Leaves]
It's the fear that's the worst. I never know when it's coming. I can't concentrate. I don't feel like I'm part of the school. I feel like I'm in a horror movie where this creature follows me around terrifying me and there's nothing I can do about it? You don't know what's going on in this kid's head. You don't know what he's capable of.
What does that mean?
Nothing. Maybe I'm overreacting.
Lady, if this kid lays a finger on you, I will expel him faster than a Thai take-out place can read back your order. Okay? But until that happens, I'm genuinely sorry to say this, there's nothing legally I or the school board can do.
Come on Kurt. We're gonna be late for rehearsal.
[Gets his bag and begins to leave but stops and turns to Sue] You know when you call me lady, that's bullying. And it's really hurtful.
I'm sorry, I thought that was your name. As an apology I'll allow you to choose from the following nicknames: Gelfling, Porcelain, or Tickle Me Doughface.
I guess I'll go with Porcelain.
Damn, totally wanted Tickle Me Doughface.
Ladies, the Kurt/Karofsky bullying situation is getting way out of control. Kurt's miserable. He's losing weight and not in a good way and he's barely fighting me for solos anymore.
We've all been teased but something about what Karofsky's doing is so much worse.
We're all lucky enough to have boyfriends on the football team. I say we band together and demand that they confront Karofsky.
Okay, first of all, I'm not dating Sam. And second of all, I think you set the feminist movement back fifty years.
Look, guys like Karofsky only respond to muscle.
So, we're going to fight violence with violence?
No! Look I'm not saying that we should hit him, I'm saying that we need to defend Kurt and there's strength in numbers.
So I'm confused. [Turns to Brittany] Are you and Artie officially dating now?
Deal with it. When you guys ever fooled around, did he ever just, like, lie there?
[Walks in] Why didn't you tell me we were having a Glee girls meeting?
This is a meeting for Glee girls with boyfriends. We're going to make them stop Karofsky from bullying Kurt.
Okay, I'm dating Puckerman.
You're getting naked with Puckerman.
Besides, Puck can't mess with Karofsky. He's on probation. If he gets in a fight with him, he'll be sent back to juvee.
Mm-hmm. So now if you'll excuse us.
[scoffs] You're so on my list, dwarf. [leaves]
Look if something bad happens to Kurt and we didn't do anything to stop it, we'll never be able to live with ourselves.
Trust me on this. I've been planning weddings since I was 2. My Power Rangers have gotten married and divorced in so many combinations it's like they're Fleetwood Mac.
Are you sure we should free 300 live doves indoors? Won't that get messy?
That's why we feed them glitter.
Stop picking on Kurt.
You mind? I'm changing.
We're serious. [slams locker closed] This is a warning.
Oh, yeah?
From now on you're gonna leave him alone.
Look, if he wants to be a homo, that's up to him. Don't rub it in my face.
We're not asking you.
Yeah, we're done talking about this. It ends now. Just back off, alright?
Why don't you back off? [pushes Mike into Artie]
Karofsky plays right guard. If he gets pissed at me, I'm gonna get sacked more times than Jay Cutler, which means we're gonna lose, which means Beiste is gonna make Sam quarterback.
Is being quarterback more important to you than helping out the kid who's gonna be your stepbrother?
We both know I can help him more if I stay on top. Kurt's gonna be fine. Rachel, I'm sorry, I want to, but I can't.
I've never been so disappointed in you before.
Where were you, Finn?
Still out on the field, okay? I totally would have given him a beat-down if I'd been there.
The fact is, it shouldn't have gone down without you, Finn. You should have been leading the charge.
[softly] Lay off Finn, everyone. It isn't his problem. It's none of your problems, actually. But thank you for what you did. Especially Sam.
What the hell was that?
It's nothing, Dad.
That wasn't nothing. That guy was making fun of you. What the hell's his name?
Tell him.
Tell me what?
Tell him, or I will.
His name's Dave Karofsky. He's been harassing me for a few weeks now.
Harassing you how?
Just shoving me and giving me a hard time.
There's more. There's something else you're not telling me.
He threatened to kill me.
So let me ask you...why would Kurt make that up?
Maybe he likes me.
[opens his eyes wide]
I think we're wasting our time here. [to Sue] It's your job to protect people.
[Finn is trying to put on a tie, but can't. Santana walks up to him]
Never learned to tie a tie.
Sit down, Frankenteen. You know you're losing it. Sam's clearly the new glee favorite, he's going to be starting quarterback...
What's your point?
You need a coolness injection. Y'know if you were honest and told people we did it last year, you would go from uncool to Chilly Willy.
Maybe. But I can't do that.
[Flashback to Finn and Rachel in Rachel's room kissing]
Wait.
What?
I have to tell you something... I never had sex with Jesse. I-I lied... to make you jealous. But this is good, because now neither of us have done it, we can save it, for each other.
Awesome.
[Cut back to Finn and Santana]
If she found out, she'd break up with me.
And that would be bad because?
Because I'm in love with her and I don't wanna hurt her feelings.
Don't you see that that midget is like an anchor dragging you down to the depths of Loserville?
Stop it, Santana, that's my girlfriend! I think you should leave.
[Gets up] Okay. Well, maybe I'll tell her. I mean, if you two broke up, we'd be free to see each other, right?
[Walks in] Hey. What are you guys doing?
Nothing. I was just leaving.
Aren't you going to tell me how pretty I look?
You look amazing.
What?
I... I just really love you.
I love you, too.
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