Susan Lewis quotes from E.R.

Carol

Hey, what happened to those worms in radiology?

Susan

They're doing a consult.

Carol

No, no, those earthworms. I put a bucket of earthworms in there and they're gone.

Susan

Do you even know how to drive a motorcycle?

Carol

It's just like a big moped, right?

Susan

I guess...

Mark

Jerry!

Jerry

I called maintenance 4 times; they're working on it.

Susan

Ohhh, maybe it's the ghost from the 5th floor.

Mark

Not you, too.

Lydia

It's a true story, Mark! It's up there!

Susan

Poor guy, still pining away for the woman he loved.

Lydia

I thought he broke her heart.

Susan

Broke his own heart is more like it.

Mark

And how do you know this?

Susan

Because that's the story. It was Halloween night, the 1930s or something, up on the 5th floor. There was rain and thunder and lightning... he was a doctor, she was an intern...

She loved him, didn't she?

Susan

[nods] But a really wealthy, handsome patient had fallen in love with her, and asked her to marry him.

Chuny

What did she say?

Susan

She didn't know what to say. So... she told the doctor.

Chuny

What did he say?

Susan

He said nothing.

I thought he loved her!

Susan

He did love her, but he just stood there, he couldn't get the words out. And then, after she walked across the room, she turned back and looked at him... she put her hand to her lips, and blew him what would be their first and only kiss. They say it blew through him like a rush of cold wind.

Chuny

That's so sad!

Jerry

What happened?

Susan

Unfortunately, the doc fell out the 5th floor window, so that's kind of it.

Mark

Well, I'm sure they worked on him in the O.R. for awhile.

Jerry

Dr. Greene, I'm gonna remind you one more time...

Mark

I'm on my way. I'm gonna take Susan with me for protection.

Susan

Protection from what?

Mark

Ghost up on the 5th floor.

Susan

Why do we have to go up there?

Mark

Guy gorked off, I have to pronounce him. You're not scared, are you?

Susan

Of course not.

Susan

...Mark?

Mark

Susan?

Susan

Oh good, you're still there.

Mark

Where would I go?

Susan

Ohh, God...

Mark

The flight rotation was like the highlight of my residency. You'll be fine.

Susan

I'll be thousands of feet in the air, in something shaped like a baked potato with a frat beanie on it.

Mark

Actually, it's only hundreds of feet.

Mark

What are you doing?

Susan

Hyperventilating. Leave me alone!

Susan

Hey, what's in the box? Bridal shop?

Haleh

Did you and Al finally set the date?

Lydia

No, the opposite.

Connie

She broke off with Al.

Lydia

I'm returning this ridiculous fake virgin outfit, and they'd better not offer me store credit!

Mark

[chasing after Susan's train, shouting] Susan! Susan! Susan!

Susan

Mark!... My God, are you okay? You came to say goodbye?

Mark

No... stay. I want you to stay.

Susan

But, Mark, I...

Mark

I love you. And I'm stupid for not saying it before.

Susan

No, it's OK. I knew. In a way I knew.

Mark

We belong together. Tell me you don't feel the same.

Susan

I'm sorry.

Mark

We're right together.

Susan

Mark, you are my best friend in the whole world, I don't know how I'm gonna make it without you.

Mark

Don't go!

Susan

I have to. I don't belong here anymore, I have a new life, it's going in a different direction.

Mark

Susan... I don't want to lose you!

Susan

I'll never forget you. [As the train begins to pull away] I do love you!

Mark

What?

Susan

I love you... bye!

Mark

[about the scar from his brain surgery] Thought it was cooler than a tattoo.

Susan

You could have at least called me, you know.

Mark

And say what? "Hey, how's it going? By the way, I have a brain tumor."

Mark

First day of school and you're already making new friends?

Susan

Oh, yeah. I'm a shoo-in for homecoming queen.

Greene

So far, so good.

Lewis

Oh, yeah. Foul abscess, a neurotic granny, naked boy here and I had to break into Chen's locker.

Greene

Did you steal her stuff?

Don't drop my baby!

Susan

Don't worry, Dr. Carter used to be in the circus.

Abby

Yeah, as a clown, right?

Carter

Human cannonball. Until I got fired.

Carter

[after trying yoga] I think I twisted my knee doing that damn locust position.

Susan

No, it's "lotus," like the flower.

Carter

Oh, well that explains why it hurts. I was doing the "grasshopper."

Susan

I need a psych consult, my patient thinks he's a vampire.

Abby

'Count Fred'? Where is he?

Susan

Exam 2.

Abby

Is there a nurse in there with him?

Susan

No, why?

Abby

He's a vampire.

Susan

What do you mean he's a vampire?

Abby

I mean he drinks people's blood.

Susan

You're kidding right?

Susan

That's nasty.

Susan

Fentanyl?

Carter

I figured if I'd abuse drugs, I'd abuse a good one.

Carter

Disappointed in me?

Susan

No, no! I'm just... you were stabbed!

Carter

Twice. I don't recommend it.

Susan

[laughs and pauses] Can I see your scar?

Carter

What? No!

Susan

Why not? Don't be bashful.

Carter

No! Get your own.

Susan

[waiting for his grandmother to come home]] Why do I feel like a school kid sitting out here?

Carter

Must be the adolescent sexual tension.

Susan

[chuckles] That's it.

Carter

You know I used to have a crush on you.

Susan

Used to?

Carter

It's all coming back to me now.

Susan

[pauses] I used to have a crush on you too.

Carter

Liar.

Susan

I did! You were cute, real cute, but...

Carter

But?

Susan

Well, you were a med student, I was a resident...

Carter

I'm a resident now.

Susan

Chief Resident.

Carter

That's right. [pauses] I'm glad you came back.

Susan

Me too.

Carter

[after a pause and the sound of a car driving up the driveway, and headlights in their faces] Gamma's home.

Carter

[Talking about the weirdest places they've had sex] On a train to Seattle.

Susan

Really? With who?

Carter

I was by myself. But it was memorable.