Mark Greene quotes from E.R.

Anna

I didn't think it would be so hard.

Mark

That's why they call it labor.

Doug

Is that the mother from the fire?

Mark

Yeah, I think so.

Doug

It should have been her airway. I would have let her suffocate.

Mark

You know, I thought I read somewhere that women find baldness a sign of virility.

[laughs] Who told you that? Some bald guy?

Jerry

Hot date?

Mark

Just a couple of single guys hanging out.

Doug

So, we'll leave around 8 o'clock for a 9 o'clock set?

Jerry

You know, I'm not doing anything tonight.

Doug

Really, Jerry? Good, because there's a great game on TV.

Mark

So, Carter, you having fun paying your penance in the ER?

Carter

Ha. I'm off Surgical Service. I'm working nights in the ER. What's not to be happy about? Still, it is better than not graduating. I thought Dr. Hicks might suspend me.

Mark

Believe me, she would if she could.

Carter

I can't believe I was that stupid, sneaking off and drinking on call.

Mark

I can. You're a medical student.

Mark

Where the hell have you been? We have a double trauma, and you don't even respond?

Benton

I was closing on a [w:Mesentery|mesenteric]] [w:infarction|]].

Mark

Yeah, with how many other residents who could've closed for you?

Benton

Well, it was my surgery. I was busy.

Mark

No, no Peter. Down there is busy. In there is busy. In there is where we ignore everything else. I ignore my patients for in there. I ignore my child for in there, my marriage for in there. Don't ever pull this again!

Randi

I don't believe in divorce.

Mark

I always suspected you were an old-fashioned girl.

Randi

I don't believe in marriage either.

Kerry

So you really think Susan Lewis would make a good chief resident?

Mark

Yes, I do. [Kerry leaves]

Connie

What was that about?

Mark

I think I just sold my soul to the devil.

Carol

Mark, Doug lives his own life.

Mark

That's kind of the problem.

Carol

I'm just saying we can't live it for him.

Mark

Jerry!

Jerry

I called maintenance 4 times; they're working on it.

Susan

Ohhh, maybe it's the ghost from the 5th floor.

Mark

Not you, too.

Lydia

It's a true story, Mark! It's up there!

Susan

Poor guy, still pining away for the woman he loved.

Lydia

I thought he broke her heart.

Susan

Broke his own heart is more like it.

Mark

And how do you know this?

Susan

Because that's the story. It was Halloween night, the 1930s or something, up on the 5th floor. There was rain and thunder and lightning... he was a doctor, she was an intern...

She loved him, didn't she?

Susan

[nods] But a really wealthy, handsome patient had fallen in love with her, and asked her to marry him.

Chuny

What did she say?

Susan

She didn't know what to say. So... she told the doctor.

Chuny

What did he say?

Susan

He said nothing.

I thought he loved her!

Susan

He did love her, but he just stood there, he couldn't get the words out. And then, after she walked across the room, she turned back and looked at him... she put her hand to her lips, and blew him what would be their first and only kiss. They say it blew through him like a rush of cold wind.

Chuny

That's so sad!

Jerry

What happened?

Susan

Unfortunately, the doc fell out the 5th floor window, so that's kind of it.

Mark

Well, I'm sure they worked on him in the O.R. for awhile.

Jerry

Dr. Greene, I'm gonna remind you one more time...

Mark

I'm on my way. I'm gonna take Susan with me for protection.

Susan

Protection from what?

Mark

Ghost up on the 5th floor.

Susan

Why do we have to go up there?

Mark

Guy gorked off, I have to pronounce him. You're not scared, are you?

Susan

Of course not.

Susan

...Mark?

Mark

Susan?

Susan

Oh good, you're still there.

Mark

Where would I go?

Susan

Ohh, God...

Mark

The flight rotation was like the highlight of my residency. You'll be fine.

Susan

I'll be thousands of feet in the air, in something shaped like a baked potato with a frat beanie on it.

Mark

Actually, it's only hundreds of feet.

Mark

What are you doing?

Susan

Hyperventilating. Leave me alone!

Carol

[about Mark & Susan] I wish you guys would just get married.

Mark

What?

Carol

You're perfect for each other. You almost went on a vacation together.

Mark

You knew about that?

Carol

Mark, everybody knew about that.

Carol

Mark, what are you doing?

Mark

You see what I see?

Carol

Susan's talking to Morgenstern. So what?

Mark

He's stroking himself, puffing out his chest, just like a Slender-Billed... something-or-other. She's giving him full-frontal neck.

Carol

What are you talking about?

Mark

You'd know if you were a nuthatch.

Carol

Mark, you okay?

Mark

She turned me down.

Carol

Susan?

Mark

Now I know why. Oh God, she's stroking her neck.

Carol

So?

Mark

So why doesn't she just bend over and shake her tail feathers right in his face?

Mark

She and Morgenstern are going out. I can handle that. What bothers me is that she didn't tell me.

Carol

If I were going out with Morgenstern, I wouldn't tell anybody.