CSI: Crime Scene Investigation · Season 3
I thought we had a relationship! What are you doing taking Archie into the field instead of me?
Right tool for the right job, man. You have to understand the world you're investigating (Greg gives Nick a look) Hey, Archie? What's that "Star Trek" episode with that guy and the forehead thingy and the time portal...?
In classic, TNG, DS9, Voyager or Enterprise?
Point taken.
Or were you thinking about Farscape?
I have no idea what you're talking about.
"The best intentions are fraught with disappointment."
The semen sample I recovered is still being processed in DNA.
[walks in] Not anymore. I'm done. And no jokes about me being fast in this department. The ejaculate outside the first girl's window -- spank high. Good news: It does have DNA.
Whose?
I don't know. Ran it through CODIS, nothing kicked out.
Well, it's possible this guy's so new he doesn't even have a record.
Well, I can tell you this about him: Really low sperm count. Sample hardly had any swimmers.
That's probably from excessive masturbation. Guy's outpacing his ability to produce ... [he looks up and finds everyone staring at him] ... sperm.
You'd know it, spanky
[Sara gives Bobby the bullet from her friend to process]
Hang on a second. [smiling] You get approval from Grissom, I don't want him walking in on me.
[nodding] Yeah.
Sara Sidle.
[smiling] Yeah, I did!
All right. Just checking!
May we come in?
Say the magic word...
Warrant.
We are going back to Lady Heather's.
I can take care of this myself.
Gil, do me a favor. Get a sport car. It's a lot cheaper and easier to handle.
Unfortunately the language we speak in here doesn't necessarily translate to the world out there.
No, in here, the submissive has the power... all he has to do is say the safety word and everything stops.
Very good, Mr. Grissom.
I'm just repeating what I've heard.
You're a good listener.
Part of the job.
So, this is work?
Yes, but I value your insight.
I'm flattered...but you already seem to know the answers to your questions. You keep me in proximity when I walk away [She moves closer to him] and when I'm close you watch my lips. Are you losing your hearing?
I'm losing my balance.
Your sense of self?
No, I know who I am.
Do you?
Yes... I do. [He touches one side of her cheek with one hand then the other with his other hand] You can always say "stop".
So can you.
[Screen fades, then the next scene of them is in the morning at Lady Heather's house, having tea]
Hey Doc, I've come to get an update on ... stinky
Death: the cheapest show in Vegas.
Yeah. it doesn't suprise me. Remember the MGM fire? We found people burned to their slot machines cause they wouldn't leave the action.
Only in Vegas.
Feces?
Yep.
Under the fingernail?
Yep. [Nick looks up with pained expression]
He wiped his own ass?
[laughs] No, Nick, it's not human. It's scat. Could be from a bat.
Bat scat.
Bat guano.
There's a sucker born every minute.
Yep, and they all come to Vegas.
Bats are like bees, Nick. Don't bother them, and they won't bother you.
Let's not bother them... I mean it.
Hey, I hear you're working on Hank's case.
I believe it's my case.
Territorial. You know, guys don't like that.
You're crowding me, Greg.
Well, I have some information that'll bring us even closer.
Diane Lambart lived two hours away. If she drove into Vegas with the intention of using it as a murder weapon. I'd imagine she'd be pretty stressed.
Kamikaze Grandma.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's CSI: Crime Scene Investigation pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
