Award of Excellence? They don't have that in the Olympics.
Oh believe me, I tried.
S3Physical Credit
S3Telescope Trouble
If only we had some kind of bionic eye that made things bigger.
(Adjusting the dials on the telescope that Brent's looking through). How's that?
I can read the ingredients on the chips. Oh wait now it looks blurry. (image clears showing a scowling Wanda). Now it looks angry.
Wow, does that ever look like my telescope. Oh except this ones got two extra knobs.
[Carrying Wanda's big telescope into his garage] Protected by my intense disinterest.
S3Bean There
That is a big jar.
Yeah, it's hard to believe it was once filled with pickled eggs.
Oh right. Like you two have never made a rash decision at a bulk food store.
So how many are there?
What? Jelly beans?
No, jars.
Well, there's only one.
Well, you two are off to a good start. I'll let you count these beans.
S3Road Worthy
A monkey could've suggested a better gift. Not a deaf one either, just any old monkey.
You people are obssessed with monkeys. A spa day is a great gift. A years supply of bananas, that's the monkey gift.
You really dropped the ball on this one.
A old tire hanging from a rope that's a monkey gift. Spa day great gift.
Well Emma hated it!
I know.
You know nothing! [calmly] So what do I get her?
That's it? That's the fight?
S4Hair Comes the Judge
[Davis is bugging Oscar about the hole in his muffler.]
A porcupine died for that hole, buddy boy!
Don't make this about the porcupine!
When have you ever cut my hair?
You take a lot of naps.
Seriously, Wanda. I need your complete, impartial opinion.
Alright. I'll be completely impartial. I'll listen to you and Dinglenuts(referring to Hank).
D-dinglenuts?
There were no "Terms".
You mean to say that you didn't stipulate finite terms, establish clear, unambiguous points of chronology, duty, and ultimately remuneration?
Nope. None of those words!
S4Dog River Dave
Ungrateful ungrates!
Ingrates. I think that's ingrates.
Ingrateful ingrates!
S4Two Degrees of Separation
It's like Africa in here. It's like a sauna. It's like a Sauna in Africa!
Oh, It's imperceptible.
Well I percept it!
S4Just Brent and his Shadow
Blink twice if you're in danger.
[Shortly thereafter.]
You blinked like 13 times; I don't know what that means.
S4Demolition
[repeated line] Coffee break.
Why did you blow up the tractor?
… Oscar told me to. He said Ce—. He said th-that don't bother trying to fix the tractor, Ce-Cecil told him, just blow it up.
Gilligan. Alright listen up everybody: Due to unforseen … Hank, we're not gonna be blowing up a barn.
S4Jail House
Davis is doing hard time, it's no walk in the park.
Okay goose-down comforter, hypo-allergenic pillow, earl grey tea-
No chamomile?
They were out.
This is gonna be hell.
Prison. You know, the jughouse?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Corner Gas pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.