AnnieYou two are bad friends! Bad!
That's unfair! What about you guys? You don't like our movie, we can't say the word "Blade", there's phones in the refridgerator - oops!
[Britta runs off to the kitchen; Troy and Annie grab her and drag her to Annie's bedroom]
Annie
Troy, Abed!
LET ME SEE IF HE CALLED! I HAVE A RIGHT TO KNOW! YOU'RE MONSTERS! YOU'RE HITLERS! YOU'RE RACIST PEDOPHILES! YOU'RE THE OPPOSITES OF BATMAN!
You don't know what that means!
I'M GONNA RIP OUT YOUR THROATS AND EAT YOUR-
[Abed shuts and locks the door before Britta can finish her threat]
Annie
Still think the lock was overkill?
Annie
[imitating Troy] "There's phones in the refridgerator!" [to Troy] It's you.
Annie
She’s calling him?!
She was born in the 80's - she still uses her phone as a phone!
Annie
That's fine; it's fine! We just won't answer it.
Won't it go to your voicemail?
[Annie answers Britta’s call]
[Annie makes a weird noise, then hangs up]
We are so screwed. How are we gonna memorize all this?
Let’s just go over it again. Kingdom, phylum, class...
Order, family, genus, species. I used a mnemonic device. "Kevin Please Come Over For Gay Sex."
Annie
Why not use Karen?
Because it’s gay sex, dummy.
Now I can’t remember anything! Thanks!
Annie
We come all this way, and you just leave me alone without so much as sending a text message? I'm sick of it, Jeff... Nigel... Winger! [tries to throw two more drinks in Jeff's face, but realises they are empty] Can I get two more of these, please?
Enough! This day has turned crazy. I'm gonna go upstairs, towel off, and pray to God that I wake up in the middle of a final in a class I didn't know I was enrolled in. [storms off]
[The study group returns to Study Room F]
Annie
It’s good to be back.
Should we go celebrate at Skeepers?
Aw, come on, Shirley; we all have lives.
There you are! I am so proud how you stepped up and made amends, and everyone forgave you! Because when it comes right down to it, Greendale's a forgiving place.
Annie
It really is.
Please keep that in mind for the next 20 seconds; remember that people can "chang".
[Chang walks into the study room]
GSGreendale Seven
AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
[whispering] He has Changnesia.
Annie
So, Abed, I was thinking about what you said about showing growth, and I was thinking maybe one way to do that is to meet new people and...
Annie
Can I set you up with a date for the Sadie Hawkins Day dance?
Blind date. I've always thought of myself as more of an acquired taste, but okay.
Oh, if you're open to meeting someone, there's a number of eligible young ladies in my church.
Annie
Shirley, I'm already finding a date for Abed. I asked first.
There's no reason we can't both help Abed find someone. Why don't we each pick a girl and let Abed decide, instead of making it a competition?
That's exactly a competition.
There are so many clouds; it's so dark!
I can't even see the Landing Strip, or any of the other nudie bars!
Annie
We must be miles above the ground!
That's international airspace. We're literally above the law! Jeff can marry any man he wants.
Wait a second guys, I think we're starting to go down.
[to Britta] You see, prayer works.
So does gravity, Shirley.
And you know who invented gravity, right?
I found the perfect girl for me, and then I met her kid. [starts singing]
I said it didn't bother me,
But truthfully it did
I promised him I'd make it
To a baseball game he had
But I bailed and never called again,
And now I'm just exactly like my dad
That's always been my choice
Truth is, I never voted,
Except when I watch The Voice
Annie
I was struggling in history,
I'm normally the best
I let Cornwallis rub my feet
To give me all the answers to a test
I caused the Greendale fire of '03
Fifty-five acres went up in a blaze,
All because I burned an ant hill
All together: This secret inside me,
Was trapped beyond a doubt
And now, my most terrible secret is out
I never slept with the great Eartha Kitt
We dry humped inside of her tour bus
ATAll together
This secret inside me,
Was trapped beyond a doubt
And now, my most terrible secret is out
Annie
Oh, I know we said no gifts, but I couldn't resist.
You realise you've just put your friends in a very awkward position. A gift creates obligation.
Annie
I don't see it that way.
Well, I do, and I think the others will too.
[knocks on the door and comes in] Merry Christmas! I know we said no gifts, but I couldn't resist.
Oh, who couldn't have seen that coming?
Oh, Annie, I love what you did with the place.
Annie
It's a work in progress.
[Troy and Britta come in]
Good tidings, fellow Christmas celebrators. And to all a good wassailing.
I know we said no gifts, but we couldn't resist.
There is a real problem with resistance in this group.
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