A character in Aqua Teen Hunger Force
Played by Dana Snyder
Aqua Teen Hunger Force · 785 quotes
Most-quoted character in Aqua Teen Hunger Force: in 394 of its 785 quotes
Most scenes with: Meatwad (201), Frylock (198), Carl (70)
Master ShakeDudes! Check. This. Out!
[Shake shows off a flashy, high-tech, chrome grill.]
Ah, yeah! We grillin' tonight!
Master ShakeNow here's what's different about this my friends: it uses actual pieces of the sun, combined with some radioactive vials from Chernobyl, and I know this is interesting also to the ladies out there, it uses them to heat burgers, steaks, chicken; no problem. And, best of all, it's not even suppposed to be inside this country.
Hey, hey maybe ya'll should turn that that thing down, Mucus Man is meltin' here.
Master ShakeHe's not meltin' he's 'chilaxin'. If you can't speak the language, go back to Mexico. Where you were born and are from.
You grillin'?
Master ShakeNo, I'm curing cancer. Yes, we're grillin'.
[looks at the Char-Nobyl 6000 emiting its flavor beam into the sky] Wow! Damn. Putting out some BTUs. [looks up at the clouds] I think those... Are those clouds on fire? [the clouds are on fire]
Master ShakeOh, you noticed that. Uh, don't worry, sir. It's just the flavor beam doing its zesty magic.
[Carl's body hair ignites] You smell burning hair?
[Shake is frantically pressing the thermostat]
Master ShakeHow do I get this to be cold?! I keep pressing it and pressing it and pressing it, and it won't get cold now!
[Frylock checks the thermostat.]
242 degrees?! Man, that's insane!
Master ShakeThat's what I've been sayin' for the last hour and a half, while you've been "Dreamin' of Jeanie."
Dammit, I think we're gonna have to freakin' call the landlord. The compressor's on the fritz again.
Well, he...he may be gone. I...I wouldn't go out there.
[As we see that the outside background is melting] And why not?!
Watch this. [Flings a skillet out the front door, causing it to explode almost immediately]
Master ShakeThat was my Alton Brown saucepot! I use it to make my Balsamic Reduction! Dammit! … You've seen me do it.
Shake! You left that grill on, didn't you?
Master Shake[looks outside] Oh... uh... no!
Well then, why is it on?!
Master ShakeI don't know... uh... it's in "self-cleaning" mode!
No, I think it's on "create-a-hole-in-the-ozone" mode, Shake!
Master Shake[Treading water] Phew. Feel that cool water. So soothing!
Yeah. Feel that polar bear chewing on my head up here. [We see this is actually happening]
Oh my God! This is a melted polar cap!
Master ShakeUh, no, no. Polar caps are traditionally cold. And this... [The water begins to boil] ew, this is starting to get hot. [The grill is still running] Aw, hell.
We've got to get to that grill.
Master ShakeI know. You've said it like 93 times!
Hurry somebody! Hurry!
Master ShakeMex—Mexicans! They'll do it! They'll do anything! Who here knows Spanish?
Carl may. His hair is dark.
Master ShakeThat's a good thought. I'm gonna ask him.
What is this dissension in the ranks? Someone refuses to blow.
[grabs crotch] Oh no, I got somethin' you can blow all right.
Carl, no.
WELL, WHY IS HE THE KING?!
Master Shake[shoves Carl aside] Uh...because he is the smartest and best...looking, and his wisdom lead us to this great utopia, isn't that right, handsome master?
Yeessss, that is correct. Mucus minions, congest him, at once!
No, Meatwad. Please.
[Two mucus men surround him] Ah, that takes two of ya. Let's go.
[Carl is immediately congested]
I remember that one time you was in the bathroom...with that magazine. 'Cept that we ain't got no bathroom, so you know. And we all know what you was doing...
[Start Flashback]
I'll show ya stars! Take this! [shoots lasers and hits wall, revealing Shake]
Nice shot buddy.
Master ShakeWait! What I'm doing in here is private!
[End Flashback]
Master ShakeOh man! Back then I was so self-conscious about my body. You know, Frylock wanted to fix that hole but I said no. And now, I like it when people watch.
I still can't figure out what you're doing with yourself.
Master ShakeHey, how about that time Playboy called me.
What boy?
Master ShakeTh-The playboy. He wanted me to go party at his mansion house. Ya know, cause he had too many girls and not enough guys. Ya know, he called me! Remember?!
[Start Flashback]
Master ShakeNo Jimmy. Sorry, I'm counselling a youth camp today. Yeah, I'm doing some stuff with my church. Thank you, though. Have a blessed day.
[End Flashback]
Remember when I save both of y'all's asses?
ShakeYeah.
Alright, when?
ShakeName one time, Once!
[A flashback starts, with 'Party Party Party' playing, Frylock destroying the RainbowMaker 4000 from "Escape from Leprechapolis", then a clip from "Super Squatter" is shown]
He needs medical attention.
[A clip from "PDA" is shown]
ShakeWell, I guess I'm satisfied then
Breathe, damn it!
[Meatwad coughs, then A clip from "Frat Aliens" where D.P. is tied to a rocket and Frylock lights it up and launches into Carl's house, the security system slaughter D.P., A clip from "Super Birthday Snake" where Frylock destroys Nathan Scott Phillips with a fireball, A clip from "The Clowning" where Frylock freezes Carl, A clip from "Dusty Gozongas" where Frylock freezes the blue flame pipes]
ShakeWait no, those are awesome!
[A clip from "Balloonstein" whete Frylock throws a broken glass covered Meatwad, A clip from "The Dressing" where Frylock and Meatwad drag a curtain covered Turkitron]
Fine. I'm not spinning, don't touch--
ShakeYou son of a- [Kicks Turkitron
[A clip from "MC Pee Pants" where the place explodes and blows away MC Pee Pants, A clip from "The Cloning" is shown]
ShakeTake him out.
Wait no!
[shoots George Washington with a shotgun, A clip from "Boost Mobile" where two boost mobile phones fall into a pitfall] Meatwad. [Meatwad throws a big boulder to cover the pitfall, A clip from "Universal Remonster" where Frylock unplugs one of the wires.] There we go. [A clip from "Interfection" Where Frylock uses eye lasers to blow up pop-up ad for the tin]
Okay okay, fine!
[A clip from "Super Hero" where Frylock uses eye lasers to blow up three mutant worms, A clip from "Rabbot" where Frylock beams Carl up and drops him flat on his back on his roof, Another clip from "PDA" where a gigantic food crushes Frylock, A clip from "Mayhem of the Moonites" where Frylock pins Err and Ignignokt down the road]
AAAAGGGHHH!!!
[A clip from "The Last One" where Frylock kills Happy Time Harry, A clip from "Super Sirloin" where MC Pee Pants as Sir Lion gets shredded alive, A clip from "Robositter" where the Robositter gets liquified, A clip from "T Shirt of the Dead" where Frylock blasts the Easter Bunny's face off, A clip from "Video Oujia" where Frylock kills Billy Witch Doctor, A clip from "Revenge of the Trees" where Frylock destroys one of the trees and grabs Carl]
Come on, let's go! [The montage freeze frames]
Well, you put that whole thing over the rock music, huh?
Hey guys, remember when me and you and Meatwad-
Master ShakeWhat, Tera? What? Shut. Up. You're just, you're so mouthy! All I see are lips moving! Stories that go nowhere! Will you please just keep eating your corn dog?
Where's Dan from Grim Reaper Gutters? I wanna party with him.
Master ShakeHe said he'll be back tomorrow. Sold us a bridge in New York. [laughs]
Ain't no bridges in New York.
Master ShakeThat's the joke! [laughing]
I said there ain't no bridges in New York! [pulls out a gun]
Uh, Meatwad...where did you get that?
What does that matter? [points gun at himself] None of that matters now...
Wait, wait, no no!
Master ShakeNOO!
[Meatwad shoots himself]
Master ShakeHey, I have bad glaucoma.
So? Go to the doctor.
Master ShakeI-I did. He said you should grow me some pot.
Marijuana?
Master ShakeWhatever the kids are callin' it these days, yes.
[In the giant bong, Shake puts his own colon in his mouth]
Hoo, boy! What is that? Your colon? Get that out of your mouth. That's gross! You don't know where that's been.
Master ShakeWhat? I know-- I know exactly where it's been, man.
Hi, I'm high. Heheheh, you get it Shake? This is awesome.
Master ShakeYou know what we need to do? We gotta get some instruments, take lessons, and learn to play them, and then we're gonna have the hottest jam of 'Comfortably Numb' that anyone has ever heard in their life!
Fryman, we have hidden four grams of cocaine in your room.
We did?
No, we didn't, Err. But we would. And we will tell the pigs that when they arrive.
Do the thing!
[The Mooninites turn, Ignignokt disappears, but Err is still visible]
The pigs will never find us!
For we are thin lines of deception.
Deceptinominon!
Err-no, other way.
[turns again, still visible] Deceptinoitus!
Turn this way.
Oh. [turns again, still visible]
No, other way. Third--
I know how to do it, come on man.
Master ShakeHey, when we gonna fix my guacomole?
Come on, hippies. We are the dope-men.
Because we wear corderoy!
[first lines]
Daddy?
Next door, jackass. [slams door]
[Ezekial knocks on the Aqua Teens' door, and Shake answers]
Daddy!
Master ShakeNo, no! You're, uh... you're probably thinking the guy next door. Big, fat guy; you take care.
[Ezekial starts to walk back towards Carl's house; Carl racks a sawnoff shotgun; Ezekiel runs away.]
That's right, get lost!
FrylockCarey Means · 329 quotes
CCarl195 quotes
IIgnignokt30 quotes
ErrMatt Maiellaro · 27 quotes
OglethorpeAndy Merrill · 26 quotes
EEmoryMike Schatz · 20 quotes
Cybernetic GhostMatt Maiellaro · 12 quotes
TurkatronMatt Maiellaro · 12 quotes
WDr. Weird11 quotes
SSteve11 quotes
Happy-Time HarryDavid Cross · 10 quotes
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Aqua Teen Hunger Force pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
