Hold on! [drops down on the floor] Do you... like me?
MarcelineOf course I do, you old jerk!
Really? Wow. [wipes sleeve, spreads his arms wide] How about... one of these? [Marceline pauses for a beat. She embraces him, visibly bittersweet] Ah! [they pull back and look at each other's eyes; he then puckers his lips] Mwah, mwah, mwah... [Marceline gasps]
Marceline
AUUHH!! Not like that!! Dah, you don't remember anything, do you... Simon?!
Marceline
Why do you even come see me when you don't remember me? You don't even know who you are!
Yes, I do! I am a lyricist! [pulling pages out his beard] It's all here, on the page! The page! In song, baby! On this receipt! On this takeout menu! On these newspapers! [laughing]
Marceline
Huh? [grabs a page] Look! This clipping! This was you, Simon! Before the war!
Marceline, why'd you invite Ancient Chubs to play basketball?
Marceline
Hahh... [beat] Well, he's very dear to my heart. I love him.
..What you are talking about, Marceline?
Marceline
We've been around for a long time. We've had a long history together, it's.. it's a long story.
Yeah, lay down, Marceline! Go to sleep. Right, what're we talkin' about?
[Finn takes off his pack and dumps its contents on the ground. Jake takes a cookie out of the pile, Marceline holds an empty brown paper bag]
Marceline
Hey, where are my red erasers? They were in here.
Uh-oh... I thought they were candy.
Marceline
You...ate all...MY RED?!!
Calm down, Marceline. There's gotta be some red stuff in these ruins. I'll go explore. You guys hang out here and save your energy. [walks off]
Marceline
Thanks, Finn. [Finn walks into a cave, points to Jake]
Be cool. [Jake eats his cookie, turns to Marceline]
So... how hungry are you? [Marceline hisses at him, he cowers] Aah! I'm sorry! Please don't eat my blood!
Marceline
(sighs) Jake, I don't want to hurt you, but you should know things get crazy when I'm hungry.
Marceline
I'm gonna go into feral mode. Oh, it's not gonna be pretty. [Jake whimpers, eats his cookie] I know! Let's tie me up. That way, you won't be scared.
And that will keep you from draining my bloods?
Marceline
Not physically, no, but as a prop, I think it'll be good for both of us. You know, psychologically.
[gulps, whispers] Hurry, Finn...
Marceline
Get me a bucket of lava, Jake...
Hey, you know better than that!
Marceline
(ravenously) DO IT...!
(Jake stares fearfully at Marceline.)
(nervously) Don't go crazy, okay?
Marceline
I'm freaking HUNGRY!
Oh, why did you leave me alone here, dude?
Oh, my glob, oh, my glob, where are you, man? Marcy's wigging out!
Marceline
Jaa-aake...
Marceline
I can smell your insides, Jake. They smell...(sniffs) ...RED!!
Marceline
Yeah, let me see in there!
Marceline
OH, YEAH!
[Gunter guides Marceline, Finn and Jake to Simon in his ice laboratory]
Marceline
Simon!
Marceline! [she flies down to him and embrace each other]
Marceline
I thought I'd never see you again.
I can hardly believe it myself. You're all grown up.
Believe? She's like a million years old.
One million years?! How can it be?!
Marceline
He's just kidding. I'm only a thousand.
Do you remember anything when you were the Ice King?
Nothing specific, just dream-like impressions.
Do you still have impressions from all the times you flip your bricks?
Marceline
Knock knock. Yo, Peebs. You wanna make a midnight Squeez-E-Mart run? I'm gonna drink the red from out the customer's bloodshot eyes. [laughs] Psyche, I'll probably just get a Slushie. Bubblegum? [floats closely to the bed and touches her hair] Bonnibel?
Marceline
Wahh!
Marceline
[deadpan] Aaaahhh!
Marceline
Ugh! What are you doing here?!
Be not afraid, my child, it is I, the one true princess of Ooo.
Marceline
Wh-where's Bubblegum?! [King of Ooo jumps high as she slashes his pillow]
Ah-whoa, relax! Bubblegum is fine, just fine. [starts bouncing up and down] And deposed and powerless—so crushed by defeat was she, that the tyrant exiled herself to a sad cabin on the shores of Lake Butterscotch—technically still Candy Kingdom territory. But in my mercy, I've allowed her to remain.
Marceline
You're the princess?! Since when?!
Well, by the reckoning of my new tyrantian calendar, Ooo's official calendar... uhh, two glorious months.
Marceline
Two months? But... but then why didn't she te— Dugh! Bubblegum... [flies out of the opening further away]
Tell Bubblegum I wear her nightgown! Tell e-e-e-everyone!
Maybe we can find something useful around—ohh!! [sees writing on the wall reading "Marceline made me write this – Bonnibel Bubblegum"]
Marceline
Your tag! We actually found it. Man, your handwriting hasn't changed at all. [laughs] Still as prissy and prim [turns back] as— wha..?
[Bubblegum starts breaking down in her tears]
Marceline
Hey, h-hey, whoa, wait! I didn't mean... I like your handwriting, I think it's really pretty...
It's-it's not that... I lost my hat...
Marceline
W...we can get you another hat.
I lost my hat, lost my home, lost my people... I can't even keep darn varmints out of my pumpkin patch.
Marceline
Oh, Bonnie, you're...
I tried. I really, really tried. I just— I thought that if I shut everything out and just focused on work, it will all be okay. [debris starts crumbling down] And look what that landed me. All I managed to do was to push everyone away. I pushed you away. I'm sorry, Marceline. I've been a real dinger to you.
Marceline
C'mon. Why are you even apologising for?
You really like chopping wood, huh?
I'm not chopping wood. I made a toothpick from the ancient elm! See?
Oh-hoh! He-heh— [the tree crashes through the window] Whoa!! [a scathed Marceline peeks out the tree]
Marceline
Uhh, knock knock.
What the dip, Marceline?!
Marceline
Sorry, it was supposed to be a joke. Actually... I have something really serious to ask. I want you to do the procedure. The one we talked about?
I'm sorry, but I don't think you'd make a good blonde.
Marceline
No, not that. I don't wanna be a vampire anymore.
Marceline
You said you were working on a cure, right?
[sighs] Well, the machine is built and the serums are ready, but... are you sure you wanna do this?
Marceline
I'm sure. Some bad things happened to me when I was little. When I became a vampire, I was just a messed-up kid. Now it's a thousand years later and I'm still messed up! [Peppermint Butler nods] I don't want to spend eternity like this... with this emptiness. I want to grow up.
You done it this time, Marceline! You sucked the life out of defenseless animals!
Marceline
I ain't done nothing!
You think I'm buyin' that, Boom Boom Mountain?!
Marceline
Oh, get some proof!
You want proof? Look! [punches the ceiling, debris falls on his head] Ouch! Proof how often I'm gonna go if you don't confess!
[scales down] I'm wailing out!! [Finn sits on Jake]
Listen, Marcy, I can barely control this guy. And the villagers are getting crazy! They want to run you over with a wagon, and I'm offering you a way out. [Peppermint Butler walks in]
Hey, dalewaids, I just swept the place.
Marceline
Finn, be real for a second.
Marceline
Look into my eyes, man! I didn't do it!
[Finn stares in her deep solemn eyes. He grows suspicious as she starts twitching]
To be honest, it looks like you're not sure if you did it.
Marceline
Okay, I'm not sure! Something... weird happened last night. I had a weird dream about stuff.
Dream stuff always means somethin'!
We'll figure this out, Marcy, together. We promise.
Marceline
Thanks, Finn.
That's cool, you guys, but clean this mess also, you bums.
Marceline
Bonnie, I don't get it. Jake's talking about vamps at the same time you fixed me, and there can't be any still around!
Well, clearly something's creeping around.
Marceline
Okay, what about the paste you took out of me? That should be all that's left that's vampiric in the modern world.
It's all over there, safely in the safety bucket. [all gone] What?! Pep But, what'd you do with the gunk?!
Okay, there was one that looked like if a baby snake was a baby-baby.
[Pep But scribbles in his sketchbook and shows an illustration of a larva-like thing with its tongue out on top]
Nah, that's not right. There was another one that looked like if an ant hill were a girl.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of ant hill with eyelashes and lips]
Nah, that's not right. There's one of them that looked like a wet uncle.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of a face with a tie, messy hair and moustache with teardrops]
Nah, that's not right. There was a lady who looked like black drapes on a cake pop.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of a cake pop and drapes]
Nah, that's not right. There was also one that looked like an angry stop sign coming out of a loaf of bread.
[Pep But scribbles another, shows illustration of what looks like a epicanthic folded face between two sides]
Nah, that's not—oh, actually, that one's pretty close.
Marceline, listen to me. You will never defeat the Vampire King. You can't even defeat me in your current state. [Marceline sits down in Jake-House]
Marceline
All right, what do you want?
The truth is, I hate the King as much as you do. He's a total dink. I came looking for you because I want to team up. Then you started tempting me with boy blood [LSP flirts at him saying "Hey!"] and hurling spiky purple gobs at me. Here's the dope. You need me. [Marceline moves LSP back]
Yeah, okay, girl, you got this.
I don't know how it finally happened, but... he must have let you beat him.
[cut to Vampire King biting Marceline's neck while being staked]
Marceline
[beat, facepalms] Ugh!! All right. Say we do work together, you need to give up drinking blood. [turns invisible]
I'm a vampire! Drinking blood is kind of the main thing.
Marceline
And you can drink red just as easy. [he grunts] No hurting poor, scared blood-filled animals.
[beat] Well, then I suppose I have no choice. I'm just going to waste you [grabs Marceline by the neck] and eat that kid because that's what an old-school vampire does! [behind the rustling bush comes out a crying Crunchy]
CCrunchy
I don't wanna play anymore! [bumps Hierophant into Jake-House]
[gasps] No! I-I wasn't invited! [disintegrates] NOOOOO...!!
[Marceline flies over and sucks his essence; she absorbs the laughing soul inside of her. Finn observes his skull and bones]
Marceline
Dude was too old-fashioned for his own good. He just couldn't get with the times.
Vampire King
How many times do you want to do this, Marceline? Our lives are magnetised. [Marceline morphs further and charges at him] We're in a negative loop. But we can change our outcome this time!
Marceline
I like the outcome where you get staked!
Vampire King
And you become a vampire?
Marceline
Rrrrh... [morphs back to normal with her head being held]
Vampire King
Marceline... [she starts punching his arm] I know I was ruthless in the past, but tell me. What's the one thing you've noticed about the world since you beat me all those hundreds of years ago?
Marceline
Everything repeats over and over again. No-one learns anything, because no-one lives long enough to see the pattern, I guess.
Vampire King
But you've lived long enough.
Marceline
I know, duh.
Vampire King
And you still think this is the right way, fighting me?
Marceline
The other way's like a black hole. An unknown.
Vampire King
So let's consult a witch.
[she immediately punches his face, sending him flying into a large thick cloud. She gets a spare stake from her left boot]
Marceline
No witches.
[as she flies over, the thick clouds part away to see a vocalising Vampire King in a cloud pool and shreds his suit]
Vampire King
I'm not afraid of the unknown! [pounding his chest] I have the power to change destiny! [shoots a twirling column of water high in the sky, thunder crashes] Queen of vampires! You weigh the scales of fate! Spill my guts or face the unknown! Either way, I will not bite! For turning you would subjugate me to the wheel of fortune, and I am a king, not a hamster. My path runs straight into the void on a sick flaming chariot! [bursts column and rains on Finn, Jake and Bubblegum]
FJFinn/Jake/Bubblegum
Whoa...
Vampire King
Stake me! I will not hide! [shreds his pants, thunder crashes] Do it, chicken! You make me sick! [drops down and squirms in his cloud pool]
Marceline
Okay, dag! We'll take your stupid thing out!
Vampire King
My what?
Marceline
Your dang vamp juice! Come on!
Vampire King
Cool.
Marceline
Well... finally did it, big guy. You won. Well played. [watches Bubblegum, Finn and Jake as they subdue the giant cloud monster] Just kind of wish you would've gotten it over with a thousand years ago and saved us all some trouble.
[the giant cloud monster passes underneath Marceline, drenching her as it heads to the Candy Kingdom]
Marceline
Better late than never, I guess. [sighs, sings]
Smelled something bad
Just a sec, now it's gone
Was it there all along?
Smelled like garbage and cheese
Was it just on the breeze
Or was it me?
[another voice sings along] Was it reality? [she sees a flying ice wizard]
You remembered my song! [chuckling, lands down]
Marceline
Simon? Wh... what are you doing here?
Well, I saw through my peeping scope that everything was going boom and exploding and monsters, and all my friends were in grave danger and horrible torment.
Marceline
And you wanted to help?
No!! I felt left out. I'm just a phone call away, you know. [Marceline hugs behind Simon, tearing up]
Marceline
I'm sorry, Simon. Next time, for sure. [sighs, sits down] Anyway, you don't want in on this fight. This one's a loser.
[sits beside her] Oh, I see. Sittin' this one out, huh?
Marceline
Yeah, I guess. And don't try to talk me out of it.
What? No, no, I'm right there with you. You and me, we're survivors, right? Like cockroaches or rats. Sure, you could fight and try to save the day, but what if you lose? Then what? You could die! Better to run and hide like a rat. Right, buddy? [holds her in his embrace]
Marceline
[pushes him] Unh! Did you just call me a cockroach, Simon?!
What? No! No, no, no... no.
Marceline
[beat] Thanks, buddy.
Marceline
You're okay!
My armor has an emergency-
Marceline
(hugs her) You scared me.
Marceline
Even back when we weren't talking, I was so afraid that something bad would happen to you and I wouldn't be there to protect you and- (sheds a few tears) I don't want to lose you again.
(gently) Hey, I'm a tough gum. Nothing never happening to me, never.
Marceline
I know, I- girl, you phrased that so weird.
I might have a concussion. (the two giggle and then kiss)
Adventure Time · 447 quotes
