Grace Adler quotes from Will & Grace

Karen

You're not still living together, are you?

Will

No! Well, she's living here right now...

Grace

Staying here. For just a couple of weeks until the dust settles.

Jack

On your genitals?

Grace

On my divorce.

Jack

Because of your genitals?

Grace

Oh, my God, where have you been? I've been looking all over for you.

Will

I was downstairs wringing the Christmas goose.

Grace

Don't you think you should do that in private?

Jack

Don't mind me, I just need to get a few things. I'm entertaining a gaggle of gays across the hall.

Will

I believe the correct term is "a giggle of gays".

Jack

Ah, she stands corrected. Grace, where's your shame pizza?

Grace

I do not have...

Jack

Grace...

Grace

Vegetable drawer.

Jack

[examining the pizza] This is a pepperoni pizza, but there's no pepperoni, just crop circles of cheese...

Grace

IT CAME THAT WAY!

Will

Well, this is a first.

Grace

Yeah.

Will

We did say we wanted to do crazy things. To feel young.

Grace

Well, sexuality is fluid now. It's what young people do.

Will

You know what young people don't do? Say "That's what young people do".

Will

I need closure, Grace. I need to find out why he broke up with me.

Grace

You don't.

Will

It's two minutes of his time. What could go wrong in two minutes?

Grace

Ask every girl who ever got pregnant at her prom.

Grace

Did you just steal a badge from a cop?

Karen

Did you just eat an entire tray of sliders?

Grace

I'll keep your secret if you keep mine.

Grace

Will! I just got amazing news!

Karen

Grace got an STD!

Grace

I did not say "STD", I said "QVC".

Karen

Well, they're both ways to get something cheap that looks awful.

Grace

This is all your fault!

Will

How is this my fault?

Grace

Because you made me write down my feelings like a WASP instead of eating them like a Jew!

Grace

Oh my God, you scared me! I thought someone was robbing the place!

Jack

I'm not robbing the place, I'm just rifling through drawers looking for money.

Grace

We are going to Schenectady.

Will

Schenectady? But that's where your family lives.

Grace

We are going there to celebrate my mom's birthday. It was her dying wish.

Will

I thought her dying wish was for you to get breast implants.

Grace

She had a lot of dying wishes.

Grace

I'd like to thank you again for inviting my dad.

Will

My pleasure. And thank you for inviting my mom.

Grace

Yeah. I thought when I did it, "Oh, that'll show him!" I forgot that I live here too.

Jack

Estefan, this is Will and Grace. Will, Grace, Estefan.

[looking at Grace] Oh, this is Will! Look at him, with his square jaw and wild mane of red hair!

Grace

What? No! I'm not Will! I'm obviously a woman!

Maybe you are not the one to say what is obvious.

Jack

He's got you there, Grace.

Grace

Hi, I'm Grace Adler. I live in the building, and I'm running for president of the New York Society of Interior Designers. I actually designed this lobby. What's your name again?

Sharon Timmer. I've lived directly below you for 19 years. Could you move? I wanna get my mail.

Grace

Why'd you let me talk for so long?

Will

Hi, Mrs. Timmer.

Your wife is yappy and rude.

Will

That's why we never have sex.

Grace

Do you think Karen's all right?

Jack

Well, we know she's not dead, because I'd get an alert on my phone about her last wishes. I'm supposed to delete her porn and set your closet on fire.

Grace

You've never felt too gross for sex?

Never. Not once. Not even the day I got hit by a cab.