Cyril Sneer quotes from The Raccoons

And now our question for you boss is...

When are we going to get a raise?

Never!

From all available reports, you're absolubtely right Cyril!

Mr Sneer, it's my great pleasure to present you this official communication from the tax department.

No! No, I don't want it! I don't deserve it!

You don't want it?

Of course I don't want it! Can you think of anyone that would want it?

Certainly I can! Might I suggest the Evergreen Orphans' fund?

Fine, give it to them. (pauses) The Evergreen Orphans' fund?

You saw it here ladies and gentlemen, Cyril Sneer is turning over his $50,000 tax refund to the Evergreen Orphans' fund!

(Turns white) Did you say... refund? (keels over)

Bert

Your pop has really changed Cedric! I can remember when this sort of thing would have driven him nuts!

(Off camera) It was just a game. That's all. Just a game. AAARGH!

Like I said, it's a little silly. Just a childhood embarrassment, but I never got over it. The idea of playing in public still brings me out in a cold sweat.

You always told me to face up to things Pop.

But we were gonna surprise you boss, honest!

Surprise me? Then do something right! That'd surprise me.

By the way Cyril, how come you just happened to have a sax in your trunk?

Oh that? Oh, it's my spare! Always keep a spare in the trunk!

There's $50,000 in prize money up for grabs in that pylon race! And you're going to win it!

(mumbling) Or die trying!

Gee Ralph, are you sure you're up to this? You haven't logged all that many flying hours.

Maybe not Cedric. But I've had it up to here with Troy Malone. I'm going to give him a run for his money.

It's not his money. It's my money. Now get out there and bring back that fifty grand. And don't wreck my plane!

How's my ace pilot doing?

Well, he's still in the air Pop.

Mission accomplished sir!

Amazing! With you three it's usually mission impossible!

Bert

Cyril! Cyril! Open up! Let me in!

Huh? I'll let you in for a lifetime of trouble if you don't get out of here pronto! It's the middle of the night!

Bert

Cedric and Bonneville are in trouble!

Don't go away!

Pigs! If anything happens to my son I'll hold you responsible!

Us? We were sleeping boss!

See? They admit it.

Bert

WOW!

Cedric! What's happening here?

Something that happens once in a blue moon Pop!

I might as well play golf on the Sahara Desert, the amount of time I spend in sand traps!

Sand Wedge again sir?

I'll turn you into a sandwich if you don't watch your lip Pig!

(Whilst playing golf) You're crazy to break up with Lady Baden-Baden. Just because she took a job Knox! Drat.

Mr Knox

But sir, where I come from a gentlemen would never let his wife take a job. It's tradition.

Lucky shot Knox! The heck with tradition! You can't kiss off a perfectly good marriage because of your pigheaded prime! You're living in the modern world Knox. The woman has a right to work if she wants. Rats! Besides, you shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth. You're getting a second income out of it!