Floyd Pepper quotes from The Muppets

Floyd Pepper

  I'm not signing.  Birthdays are just a bogus holiday created by greeting card companies!

Floyd Pepper

  [to Dr. Teeth]  You know what your problem is?  You think the whole world revolves around you, but it doesn't! It revolves around the moon, which is why we have winter!

Janice

  Did you know the original name of the band was Imagine Dragons?

Floyd Pepper

  That is their name.

Janice

  I know, they kept it.

Floyd Pepper

  Hey, uh, where do I know you from?

  I don't know, maybe The Office?

Floyd Pepper

  Oh, oh, we work together.  Oh, man, I'm sorry, brother.  I'm Floyd, I'm with the band.  Hey, it's good to see ya, again!  Have a drink!

  Okay.

Welcome to the Morning Meeting, everybody... or should I say the "Whenever You Decide to Show Up" Meeting?

Floyd Pepper

Uh, is that the official name now? That works a LOT better for us...

  How long have they been married?

Janice

  Oh, wow, like, how can you measure the intertwining of two souls?

  In years.

Janice

  Oh, then forty.

Floyd Pepper

  Aw, come on, Chenoweth, sing at the party!

  Yeah, yeah!

Floyd Pepper

  Look, my parents mean so much to me, without them, I don't even think I'd be here.

  [giggles]  Okay, I had so much fun with you guys and I'm open tomorrow so, yeah, let's do it.

  Well, thanks for nothing, Kristin Chenoweth; your selfishness just broke and old couple's heart.

Janice

  [whispering]  She said "yes".

  Withdrawn.

  Is that the real moon, or just a department-store one?

Floyd Pepper

  Ain't no real moon—not since the 70s.

  So, you guys remember how we did it in rehearsal?

Janice

  Oh, we'd like to do it different from rehearsal.

  Okay; well, then, why did we even rehearse?

Floyd Pepper

  Oh, 'cause if we don't rehearse, then there's nothin' to do it different from.

  [smiles]  Y'know, I actually dig that.