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The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air quotes

318 quotes · page 20 of 22

The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air
All S1 S2 S3 S4 S5 S6

S6The Script Formerly Known As

Would you like to buy a vowel?

This trial is gonna be the death of me. We lost another juror today.

Did you look under your robe?

S6Not, I Barbecue

Tell me this, Doogie. How is it possible that we are losing?

I can't pull a battle to save my life.

S6Viva Lost Wages

Well, I tried to walk away but the craps table kept calling: "Carlton, Carlton." And the blackjack table said you can do it! And the slot machines just say: "Hey, you tall, handsome guy, come shake my hand!" These are ALL MY NEW FRIENDS! My God they're pumping a lot of oxygen in this room!

I had my knife. I went into the wild. But how's a little brave supposed to survive with all these bells and whistles? Well, the madness is over. I'm Carlton again.

Carlton, look. A quarter.

WHERE!? (he crawls on the floor, looking for the quarter)

You're pathetic!

You're right, Will. I've hit rock bottom. How come you can see the quarter and I can't?

Because there ain't no quarter. (he slaps Carlton in the head)

(At the roulette table)

Come on, eight. Eight. I need an eight.

Carlton, what the hell are you doing?

What does it look like I'm doing? I'm gambling.

You can't bet all your money on one number.

DDealer

And the winner is... eight.

Yes, I love you man!

Will So how much are we up?

We're not up. We're down.

Wht do you mean "we"?

Well, after I maxed out my credit cards-

Carlton, you maxed out your credit cards?

Well, yeah. I couldn't get full value for the airline tickets.

You hocked our airline tickets?

Well what do you expect? I only got $200 out of your ATM card. Word to the wise, Will, never leave your PIN number in your wallet.

Will You stole my wallet? How much do we have?

Whatever's on the table.

Wait a minute...

(He reaches over to the table, but the dealer slaps his hand.)

Dealer And the winner is... eight...

YES!

DDealer

...teen.

NO! Wait, that says eighteen. We got eight. We should get something.

(The dealer shakes his head.)

S6There's the Rub (1)

VVy (referring to her and Helen)

Geoffrey, what do you think? Who's more desirable?

It's a tie, you both lose.

S6There's the Rub (2)

In the first place, it's not "Banks" it's "Your Honor". Now you get your butt over to that telephone and you pull the District Attorney from whatever meal he may be eating and you tell him that you have Judge Philip Banks in jail under a bogus charge. And you might want to mention the fact that we have been denied due process: A phone call, access to legal representation and every other conceivable right guaranteed to us by the Constitution. And don't forget to mention that no statements have been taken, no witnesses interviewed, and none of the most fundamental procedures that the newest rookie on a beat would know, have been followed. My nephew and I are completely innocent, and if you don't take care of this matter, it will be you having your picture taken with numbers across your chest!

S6Boxing Helena

[Will is boxing a girl named Helena]

HHelena

Come on! Hit me!

HHelena

Your mama!

Mama said knock you out!

How do you like me now?!

HHelena

That was... impressive. Take me!

Um... You a little freaky-deeky, ain't you?

HHelena

Now!

Shoot, you ain't gotta tell me twice!

S6I, Clownius

S6Breaking Up Is Hard to Do (1)

[Using hand-puppets, Will and Carlton create an apologetic show for Ashley]

WWill (dog)

One, two, three! Hey, Ashley! [beatbox] Will and Carlton are sorry! [beatbox] Hey, kitty-cat! Hey, kitty-cat! Hey, kitty-cat! Help-help me out!

[Carlton (cat) appears]

WWill (dog)

[beatbox]

CCarlton (cat)

We care about you very much!

WWill (dog)

Ple, ple, ple, ple, ple, ple, ple, please forgive us! [beatbox]

These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.