Hilary Banks quotes from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air

Hilary

What kind of idiot picks a password no one can guess?

Hilary

I exploit people everyday, but it's Thanksgiving so I'm taking a day off.

Hilary

Oh, Geoffrey, I'm gonna miss you. Oh, we have to have a special going away dinner for you. What do you wanna make?

Carlton

Hey, Hilary. Did Dad mention me during the game?

Hilary

Yeah, he did say "Shut up, that's my kid you're talking about!"

Hilary, your father and I just want you to be all you can be.

Hilary

You want me to join the army?!

Hilary

Alright okay! I can't take it any more! I dropped out of college.

Phillip

You did what?! ...Hilary when did this happen?

Hilary

3 months ago.

3 months ago?

Phillip

and you have been lying to us since then?

3 months ago?

Hilary

Mother I can explain!

3 months ago?

Carlton

That's awful! Is he making you clean his room?

Hilary

No.

Carlton

Will you clean miiiine?

Hilary

Carlton!

Carlton

I'm sorry, Hilary, but this is too good to be true! Why should Will have all the fun?

Hilary

Why you little-

Carlton

DAAAAAAAAD-

Hilary

I HATE YOU!

Will

Yo, what's up, y'all? You know if Uncle Phil's in a good mood? I'm trying to hit him up for $50 for the homecoming.

Carlton

Will, $50 is only gonna cover the tickets. There's still the tux, the limousine, the pre-party party, the post-party party, and, in your case, bail.

Will

Yeah, you're right. This could cost a fortune.

Hilary

Oh, That's okay. Daddy's got a fortune. I always find that when you ask for large sums, it helps if you take his hand look deep into his eyes, and tell him you have cramps.

Carlton

That only worked for Hilary. When I tried it he sent me to a specialist.

Hilary

Geoffrey just looked back and gave a sad little wave.

Will

(to Ashley) And fortunately, you're too young to know what he was waving.

Gee, when Janice described him, she didn't mention that he was... tall. Not that I have any problems with people who are... tall.

My cousin used to date a girl who was, uh... tall.

Heck, the boys go to a predominantly... tall school.

Will

Am I alone in this, or did none of y'all notice he was white?

What the hell is wrong with Janice?!

Will

Oh, I'm sorry, did I say "white"? [smiles weakly] I meant "tall".

Hilary

He didn't seem that tall to me.

Will

Yo! Yo! Yo! We're here to display...

Carlton

A look at a woman who's 40 today.

Hilary

She's smart and well-dressed, so just to give thanks...

Ashley

This is your life, Vivian Banks.

Hilary

I hope there's no papparazzi around here

Oh don't worry darling, they don't know I live here

Hilary

No, it's because people mistake me for Whitney Houston.

Hilary

Forget it, Ashley, I am not getting you a stun gun for Christmas.

Ashley

I'm not really going to use it on Cousin Bobby I just want to scare him with it.

Hilary

Look, we haven't seen him since Aunt Janice's wedding. Maybe we remember him worse than he is.

Will

Yeah, right, and maybe it was Barbie's idea to catch that tan in the microwave.

Geoffrey

Young Ashley, how does a Mercedes sound?

Ashley

Vroom, vroom?

Geoffrey

Very clever. I'll get you two.

Hilary

Vroom, vroom, vroom!

Geoffrey

Nice try!

Ashley

What happened in here?

Will

We was robbed!

Hilary

Oh, my God! What did they take?!