Sweetie, would you say grace, please?
Yes, mommy... (Starts rapping) Hey there, lord. My name is Ashley Banks. My family and friends want to give you some thanks. So before this dinner's all swallowed and chewed, thank you God for this stupid food!
S1The Fresh Prince Project
I want to talk to you.
About what?
You know. From the minute you walked through that door, you've been a one-man wrecking crew, trying to tear down what's taken a lot of hard work to build up, skewering everything with your flippant shenanigans!
I was with you up until "skewering".
How was the flight, honey?
Yo, the plane ride was stupid. I was up in the first class...
Excuse me?
No, I'm saying the plane ride was dope.
Excuse me?!
No... Stupid, dope, it's not what you think. How would I say this... [in Bryant Gumbel like voice] the flight was really neat.
S1Bang the Drum, Ashley
Ashley, honey, where is your violin?
Big Sal has it.
Big Sal?
He owns this really cool store where you don't even need any money. You just go in and give him something you don't even want and he gives you this ticket and...
A pawn shop?! You took her to a pawn shop?!
Yeah, you don't have many pawn shops in Bel-Air. I had to drive all the way to east L.A.
East L.A.?
How dare you pawn her violin?!
Philip, when I met you, you were into James Brown.
He liked James Brown?
He even wore his hair like him.
[laughs] He had hair?
S1Clubba Hubba
Might I say you rate a perfect 10 on my niftiness meter?
S1Not With My Pig, You Don't
Will, there's something you should know: Sometimes... parents just don't understand.
[Philip's mother, Hattie, embraces each of the Banks kids]
Ashley, look how much you've grown! Hilary, look how much you've grown! Carlton... hi.
S1Homeboy, Sweet Homeboy
Will, why don't you introduce Ice Tray to your family?
Will (to Ice Tray): This is my little cousin Ashley. This is my bodyguard Geoffrey. All of this is my Uncle Phil. Remember, we used to say that Daffy Duck must have a little brother somewhere? Meet my cousin Carlton.
(about Ice Tray coming to visit) Word up. This is gonna be cold, stupid on the serious tip.
What did you say, young lady?
I mean, this is quite an exceptional idea, Daddy. Peachy keen even.
S1Mistaken Identity
Plans for Palm Springs: 1: Work on golf swing. 2: Review SAT practice book. 3: Ask Mr. Firth about a summer internship.
4: Get the stick out of your butt!
RReporter
The ringleader agreed to confess, only if a camera crew were present to broadcast live. What you are about to see is Minuteman 21 News exclusive. [camera shows Will]
Yeah! We done it! Word to Big Bird! We fixed 8 Benzitos, 15 Jags, and a Maserati! But I ain't like the upholstery, so I took it back, Jack!
RReporter
And do you have anything to say? [shows Carlton]
Dad?!
I've got a few questions for you. When you got this alleged confession from these two young men, did they have a lawyer present? No. Because I'm their lawyer. Did you notify their parents? No. Because we're their parents. So, officer, don't tell us to wait, and don't tell us to sit down. Just open that damn cell and let those two boys outta there or I'm gonna tie this place up with so much litigation that your grandchildren are gonna need lawyers!
S1Def Poet's Society
(to Jazz) What kind of poem is that?
I'm starvin'. When do we eat here?
We eat here later. You eat here never.
Looks like you eat here often.
(Philip throws Jazz out the door again)
S1Someday Your Prince Will Be in Effect (1)
Vivian (to Phillip): Can't you at least get into the Halloween spirit?
Philip (in a dull tone): Boo.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.