Cleveland Brown quotes from The Cleveland Show

Donna

Cleveland, I wanna have another baby.

[jumps novelty pen] Uh—wha!?

Donna

I wanna have another baby!

Donna, we just got rid of a baby. Let's enjoy our twilight years in peace. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to write a letter, longhand, in the bathroom. [shuts door] Peen, pen. Pen, peen.

Donna

[lays back against the pillow] Donna wants a baby, Donna's gonna get a baby.

Freight Train

Hey, Tubby. We're back from Vegas.

So did you have fun with cool Robert?

Robert

Hell yeah. Did you know there is a hepatitis J? [laughs] Vegas is crazy.

Ho-ho, I know. I went to the M&M store once.

Freight Train

Yeah, we got real crazy. So crazy that we decided to make him and me official.

You got murried?

Freight Train

What?! Hell, no. That would be ridiculous. I adopted him. He's my son, now.

What?

Freight Train

I've always wanted a son I could point to and say, "See that man over there? In a track suit? That's my son. My boy. My spawn. Nobody wears a track suit like my son."

You've never seen me in my romper. I'll go get it. [leaves]

Freight Train

[sighs; to Robert] Come on, cool son. Let's go wrestle up a few hustles.

[in his romper] Uh, Donna, get my back slip.

Donna

They're gone, Cleveland.

[trudging away and mumbling] My bottom's chilly.

Donna

Cleveland, we're doing it. For Valentine's Day, I want us to have a vow renewing ceremony.

Oh, God!

Donna

I divided our tasks. I split up what we need to get done before hand.

What?! Build a gazebo? Rent a tazedo? And where, pray tell, do you think I'm going to find 14 peacocks?

Donna

[begging] Please? After the ceremony, I'll let you do that thing I promised you could do on our wedding night that I lied about and didn't let you do that I'm probably still lying about it now.

I'm in!

Donna

It's the dream you gave up for me.

I'm going back to the Family Guy again!?

Wow, I could stay here forever!

Holt

Yeah, that's kind of the idea.

I brought plenty of peanut butter for protection.

Freight Train

Peanut butter?! Do I look like George Washington Carver?!

I don't know.

Kind of.

Freight Train

Hmm. I should remember that next Halloween.