[Later that evening… MaternoTron enters the dining room serving Jimmy and Hugh their dinners]
So, how's that week's worth of chores coming, Robo-booger?
All chores were completed at 1700 hours this evening.
JJimmy
Good work, MaternoTron. Assume sleep mode until the next mealtime.
Negative. A mother's work is never done. A mother must protect and pamper.
JJimmy
Oh, yeah. [clears throat] Override maternal chip directives until further notice.
Don't use that tone of voice with me, young man. Now eat! [releases the serving covers on Jimmy and Hugh's plates, revealing bowls of liquid spinach]
JJimmy
[horrified] Leaping leptons! I said water the lawn, not cook it! What is this stuff?
Soy protein, kelp, talapala oil, and spinach for flavor.
Sugarbooger's dinners never smelled quite so… how do I put it? Disgusting.
[scoops up the spinach with a ladle] This is the train and your mouth is the tunnel.
Uh, no thanks. See, my tunnel is temporarily closed for… [MaternoTron stuffs the ladle into his mouth]
JJimmy
(Oh, no.) I must have set the autonomy parameter in the mothering chip too high! She really thinks she's Mom. [MaternoTron stuffs another ladle into his mouth]
And after dinner… [takes out a scrubbing brush with eyes glowing red] your baths. [Jimmy and Hugh react with horror; Later in the master bathroom, Hugh is first to be bathed while she holds him down in the tub, scrubbing him so hard] HOLD STILL!
[screaming and moaning] Not the face!
JJimmy
Oh. Um, well, I left my homework in the lab.
Too many wires. You'll electrocute your eye out. Bedtime!
JJimmy
What? But it's only 7:00!
[Jimmy's bedroom; the time on his alarm clock switches to one minute later]
JJimmy
But I'm not tired!
Then I must rock you to sleep. [picks Jimmy up and rocks him at rapid speed; singing] ♪ Rock-a-bye Jimmy on the treetop. Tomorrow more kelp till your pant buttons pop. ♪ Are you tired yet?
JJimmy
[dizzy] And nauseous.
[Later that night in the master bedroom…]
I have been neglectful to you as a wife.
[nervously] No! Uh, really. It's okay.
No, it is not. Switching to wife mode. Take out the trash! We never talk anymore. Get me some ice cream. Let's watch a movie with lots of crying! I should never have given up my career. Rub my feet.
Where do you think you're going, young man? Here's your list of Saturday chores.
[Goddard stretches out his neck, grabs the chores list with his mouth, and gives it to Jimmy]
JJimmy
[looking over the list] "Mail letter at post office. Sit with Grandma in the park. Pick up Dad's badminton shoes. Drop off a pie at school. And take a book to Cindy Vortex's mother?!" But, Mom, I can't do that! I have to get into space, now!
Chores, first. Space travel, later.
JJimmy
Goddard, options! "Hire temporary help to do chores at $15.75/hour." Too expensive. "Use boyish charm to outwit parental unit." I don't have time. "Clone thyself." Yes! We'll have to do it mega fast!
[One by one, the Jimmy clones emerge]
Hi, everybody! Isn't it a super, amazing, great day?
[stifled grunt] You call this a great day? [sniffs] I should have stayed in bed!
Ah, but romance is in ze air, eh? It is a beautiful day to fall in love, n'est-ce pas?
[laughing] Hey, everybody! It's great to be here for Line-up Night! Hey, have you seen that Cindy Vortex? Talk about the Wicked Witch of the Elementary. [Laughs] Hey, but seriously, these are the jokes, folks, come on, laugh with me.
[Goddard plays a laugh track]
Hey! Who's up for some football, huh?
EJEvil Jimmy
Nice place, kid. You know, I could have some serious fun with this stuff... [snickers]
[All clones watch Jimmy blast off outside]
EJEvil Jimmy
Hey, you heard the man: do your chores, boys.
But I've never mailed a letter! What if I get my hand stuck in the box?!
Hey, turn that frown upside down, Mr. Gloomy Gus! Everything's gonna be terrific!
[chuckles] Mais oui! Love is all around us.
[Granny Neutron is sitting on a bench at the park, surrounded by birds as Happy Jimmy shows up]
Hello, grandmother, dear.
Where have you been? This bench is too hard. These birds are getting too close. The sun hurts my eyes.
Isn't it a beautiful day? Aren't these birds absolutely amazing? Isn't it great to be alive?!
[Cut to Gloomy Jimmy at a mailbox getting his hand stuck]
Oh, hi, Jimmy. I have to do a report on snails or Napoleon. Can you help me?
What's the point of doing homework? We do it and then what? Poof, We're gone. Nothingness, emptiness. We're all just dust in the wind.
Okay, I..I don't want to be dust in the wind.
[Cut to Cool Jimmy walking downtown with Disco music playing]
He shoots, he scores. Neutron is definitely on. Lookin' good. You the man, you the man. 'Ey, it's the Nicksta.
Neutron? What are you doing?!
I'm walkin' here! You got a problem wit' dat, Skateboard Boy!?!
Uh, "Skateboard Boy"? [Macho Jimmy skates on Nick's skate board] Whoa, check it out! Neutron has the moves! [crunching, skateboard breaks in two]
Well, how 'bout next time you get a board that can handle the Neutron style? Later, Nick-O-Rama.
[Nick looks angrily in Cool Jimmy's direction]
"I am Ultra Lord, and I will swing my mighty bat of combat on you!" "You can't catch me!" "Yes, I can!" Hey, hey, Jimmy, want to see my new action figure?
Do I? Come on, does Robin Hood wear a pantyhose? Hey, why did Ultra Lord cover himself with mayonnaise? [Sheen looks awkwardly at Funny Jimmy] He wanted to make a hero sandwich! [laughs] Hello! [knocking on Sheen's head] Anybody in there? Paging Mr. Sheen. The village called. They want their idiot back.
Are you okay, Jimmy? 'Cause you seem really weird.
I'm weird?! [laughing] Come o-o-o-o-on! You should see Ultra Lord's uncle Morris!
[Cuts to Romantic Jimmy walking to Cindy's house, smiling to the camera, and ringing Cindy's doorbell]
[sighs] Whad'ya want, Neutron?
To return a book and to drink in your beauty, Miss Vortex.
I jest not. Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Not even Shakespeare seems inadequate to describe your perfection!
Cut it out, Neutron, before I barf!
Ah, ah, ah! But before zat, would you favor me wiz a kiss?
[Romantic Jimmy tries to kiss Cindy, but has the door closed on him and faints.]
Is he for real? And what's with the bad French accent? [opens door after hearing music]
[Guitar playing] [singing] Oh, Cindy, I love you, more than Albert Einstein's theory of relativity. Oh, Cindy, ma cherie, [laughs] my little Cindy. Would you please come and kiss me? [Cindy faints to French Jimmy's surprise] Wait, why are you sleeping?
[Cuts to Evil Jimmy holding a pie as a man walks up to him]
EJEvil Jimmy
Hey, buddy, want a pie?
EJEvil Jimmy
[splats pie in the man's face, snickers] You can't beat the classics!
MMan
[licks face] Mmm… [gives Thumbs up] I'll say.
[The citizens clamor angrily at Hugh for what the Jimmy clones did]
Calm down, folks. Now, just tell me, what did the Jimster do?
He busted my skateboard, dude!
He said I was gonna be "dust in the wind."
He made me smile and my dentures fell out! [pulls out her dentures]
He mocked Ultra Lord's family!
He made my heart sing and… [snaps out of it] I mean, he said things to me so vile and despicable I cannot repeat them in mixed company.
PFPie-face Man
And, he threw a pie in my face!
[Chuckles] You can't beat the classics. [Pie-face Man growls] I'm sure Jimmy had a good reason for doing all these admittedly strange, bizarre things, so…who wants pie?
[All growling]
PFPie-face Man
[Spits] I'm good.
JJimmy
Oh, no! It was the clones! I gotta find them. Goddard, activate clone locator!
[Goddard's chest show a map with Jimmy's head representing the clones, pinging]
Let's teach him a lesson!
JJimmy
Wait, everyone! I can explain. [explaining the truth; 4 hours later…] And that's how it all happened.
PFPie-face Man
[speechless] Huh, genetic replicants manifesting mutant side effects, eh?
As long as you got rid of all the clones. One Jimmy Neutron in the world is bad enough, but six is blech!
Uh, dude, you did catch all of them, didn't you?
JJimmy
Uh… who would like some pie at my house?
EJEvil Jimmy
Here's Jimmy! [laughs evilly]
EEverybody
[to Jimmy; annoyed with anger] Neutron!
JJimmy
[nervously] So, uh, I take it that means no pie? [screams while he and Goddard run for their lives as they start chasing after him]
[Evil Jimmy faces the viewers and throws a cherry pie at the camera, ending the episode]
Hey, Neutron. Just trimming the old hedges before they start throwing off pollens for us.
Wheezer, I'm going to need my Lawnlopper back.
Well, Gee, Neutron. I gave that thing back weeks ago. You must have forgot.
Forgot about my Lawnlopper 300 Pro-Deluxe as seen on TV?! I don't think so.
Well, It's probably in your garage. Why don't you check?
It's probably in your garage. I'll just go get it.
Hey! I already told you, I gave it back, you wingding.
And I'm telling you you didn't, toolhog.
Just because my lawn is lush and silky while yours is limp and hard to manage…
What?! There's nothing wrong with my lawn.
Oh, please! Dandelions, gopher holes, and your tacky ceramic lawn cats- please!
Oh, yeah?! Well, what about your stupid lawn ducks? They're the laughing stock of the entire neighborhood.
No, you put that down right now!
Hey, look at me- quack, quack, quack. I'm a stupid lawn duck- quack, quack… whoops.
Sir Quacksalot! [smash, screams]
That was the final straw, Wheezer. [smashes Mr. Wheezer's lawn cat, then Mr. Wheezer screams] As of right now, we are Mortal Enemies!
Well, that goes double for me!
YOU'RE ON! Quick, Jimmy! Throw Carl back in his home. As of right now, we will not have anything to do with him, or anyone named "Wheezer", or anyone who has even "wheeze-ED".
JJimmy
But, Dad, you don't understand. Carl's my best friend.
Not anymore! Now follow me, Carl, 'cause as of right now, the Neutrons and the Wheezers are officially sworn "nemesises"!
JJimmy
I think it was "nemese…"
Don't correct our ignorant opponents, Jimbo! Now into the house, quick! [foreign accent] The air out here is thick with the stench of Wheezers.
Bye, Jimmy. I'll never forget you.
JJimmy
Don't worry, Carl. A feud can't last forever.
You knew my husband was allergic to brambleberry pie! You're just a dupe for that hateful husband of yours!
"Hateful"?! You take that back!
Hag-witch! [leaves as Mrs. Wheezer gasps in shock; walks up the back porch, reminding Jimmy] Jimmy, I don't want you ever to mention the word "Carl" again! (Got it?!) [enters the house with a frustrated scoff and slams the door shut]
JJimmy
Sheen, can you arrange a little get-together with Carl?
You're in luck, Jimmy. I'm having a special this month on super secret meetings. May I suggest a Mexican Bandito theme?
[Hugh and Mr. Wheezer find their lawns infested with crabgrass.]
[The angry dads approach each other.]
D'ohhh! This is all your fault, Wheezer!
Oh, no! The crabgrass started on your lawn, Neutron! I guess this neighborhood just can't have nice things!
JJimmy
[pushes them aside] You're both wasting time! The only way to fight an infestation this big is for you to work together.
Never! No lawn is worth that!
I'd rather be dipped in pickle juice and thrown to rabid weasels!
Ditto! [Goes back in the house]
[sadly patting the lawn] Goodbye, old friend. AVENGE YOU, I WILL!!!
Thank goodness you boys are alright.
Mom, does this mean that this feud is finally over?
JJimmy
And Carl and I can go back to being friends again?
Well, the Wheezers and the Neutrons may have their differences...
But we'll just have to get over them for the sake of the children.
I agree one hundred percen-- [realizes something] Just as soon as Wheezer admits that HE TOOK MY LAWNLOPPER! [crying loudly] Golly!
[Judy and Mrs. Wheezer repeatedly hit their husbands with brooms to make them stop arguing]
I just remembered. Sam at the Candy Bar paid me to send a message to Mr. Neutron and he's chosen a festive polka theme song. I think I'll sing it now.
[sings the song about the LawnLopper]
Thanks for borrowing my LawnLopper.
Yodel-lay-yodel-lay-yodel-lay-hee-hoo!
I'll be back for some new sundaes.
Yodel-lay-yodel-lay-yodel-hoo!
That'll be 2 bucks again, please!
NWNeutrons and Wheezers
[infuriated] Sheen...
Of course, we could even discuss a preferred customer discount. [The Neutrons and the Wheezers advance furiously on him as the episode ends]
The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius · 473 quotes
