Dudley Puppy quotes from T.U.F.F. Puppy

Dudley

This camp is awesome! [to Kitty] What super fun activity do you want to do first? [runs around doing camp activities] Paddle boats? Arts and crafts? Dancing? [notices the bunny kid trying to fend off some wasps] No, wait, that kid's not dancing, he got stung by a wasp.

Kitty

Forget the camp stuff, Dudley. We need to find Snaptrap.

Dudley

[recovering from consciousness as he, Kitty, and the network president are tied up to a missile] Kitty, what's going on?

Kitty

Bad news, Dudley. The Quacky the Duck Show has been cancelled, and Quacky's going to annihilate the network president as part of his revenge… and us along with him!

Dudley

[horrified shock] Wait! QUACKY'S BEEN CANCELLED?! NO! [to the network president] HOW COULD YOU?!

Hey, Didley, looks like you're the unlucky duck.

Dudley

All's good that ends good.

[pops out from trap door in floor] You mean, "All is well that ends well."

Kitty

[happily hugs him] Grammar Gopher, you're back! Oh, this is the bestest day ever!

That's best day ever. "Bestest" isn't a real word, young lady.

Kitty

[to Quacky] Yeah, now I kinda see why you fired him.

Dudley

Man, this garage is a mess. I wonder what the museum's like?

Kitty

This is the museum.

Dudley

No wonder there are no cars.

Kitty

There it is, Dudley. King Mutt's treasure.

Dudley

Wow, an actual king. You know my friend Phil comes from royalty? His uncle's a duke. Or maybe his name is Duke? The point is, he has a pool table.

Kitty

Dudley, there's more to our jobs than blowing things up.

Dudley

I know. That's why I brought a highlight reel of me punching bad guys. It's in odor-ama. You can smell the terror.

Why does the boring lady ruin career day?

Dudley

Kitty, you wanna file that one?

Kitty

[in high-pitched voice] Wait, kids, think about your future!

Dudley

[laughs; also in high-pitched voice] Kitty, you sound funny! Hey, listen to me! I'm Tiny Dudley! A little secret agent who lives in a thimble, and eats mini-mini waffles! Now you say something funny.

Kitty

I hear a beeping sound.

Dudley

I don't get it.

Chameleon

Forgot the pirate-themed forks.

Dudley

[groans] Now I get it. Tiny Dudley drives a mini minivan. [back at T.U.F.F. Headquarters; still in high-pitched voice] I can't believe those kids turned evil!

Kitty

Dudley, the gas wore off ten minutes ago.

Dudley

I know, I just like talking like this. [now in low-pitched voice] I also like talking like this.

Chameleon

Good work, kids! Time to open the presents. [opens the first present, revealing a massage chair] Ooh, a massage chair! It's from the Chameleon. Oh, I shouldn't have. [shocked as all the kids begin opening presents] Oh, what are you doing?! All the presents are mine!

But we helped steal 'em. They're ours too.

Yeah!

Chameleon

That tears it! I mean, stop tearing it! [takes out a remote] This is an override for your transformation suits. It's also a curling iron. I stole it from the pointless gadget store, eh! Now I control what you become! [zaps the kids, turning them into bugs and puts them into a bowl]

Why did you turn us into bugs, weird lizard man? I thought we were your friends.

Chameleon

You were my friends, until you touched my stuff! Now you're my supper! Notice, Agent Katswell, I didn't turn any of them into vegetables. Time to chow down.

Kitty

Dudley, we have to save those kids!

Dudley

Now's our chance to show them what being a secret agent is all about! Luckily, I still have my thermo-nuclear thermos. [presses the button with his tongue] Wow, that's hot root beer!

Being a secret agent is way cooler than being a supervillain!

[chanting] We love T.U.F.F.! We love T.U.F.F.!

Dudley

Now let's celebrate with a real party!

Kitty

Whew. Dudley, you're late for our mission. Where are you?

Dudley

I'm here, Kitty. I went undercover as your luggage. Also, I wanted you to carry me.

Dudley

Snaptrap, you're going to jail for blowing up the "Say Cheese" store.

Snaptrap

You know, it's weird. I've blown up a lot of combination cheese-and-camera shops, but I don't remember blowing up the one in Petsburg.

Actually, boss, according to your schedule, we were at the D.O.O.M. picnic the day that store was blown up.

Dudley

Wait a minute. If you didn't blow it up, then who did? [to Chameleon] Chameleon?

Chameleon

Fine! I confess! It was me! I transformed myself into Snaptrap, and framed him! There, I said it! You broke me down! Your incredible psychological tactics are impossible to resist! I hope you are satisfied.

Dudley

I was just going to ask you if you had the key to unlock these handcuffs.

Chameleon

[facepalms himself] Oh, darn it!

Dudley

Why'd you do it, Chameleon?

Chameleon

To get rid of my criminal competition. Also, I wanted a free ride to Petsburg. There's a publisher there who rejected my book. I was going to put a very lonely rattlesnake in his bed!

Snaptrap

That means I'm innocent! I get to go home.

Dudley

Not so fast! You may not have blown up the store, but you still tried to annihilate the Chameleon and me. You're going to jail!

Snaptrap

Let's not play the blame game.

Chameleon

[disguised as a pot plant, then shapeshifts into a wolf citizen] Hello! It is I, the Chameleon-- I mean, Lord of the Flies! [holds up a plate of flies] Here, have a fly. I'm sorry, I'm all out of silverfish. Oh, tally-ho, English muffin, fish and chips! [looks at the Queen's crown] And now, to make my move! [transforms into his regular self, laughs evilly while crawling up the wall, attaches himself to the ceiling and rappels down onto the Queen's crown with his tail and tries to pull it off] What is this? A crown or a bike helmet?! And why is there a cake inside of it?!

Guards! Stop this thief at once!

Oh, jolly good, tea time!

Chameleon

No tea for me. I'm filled up on flies. Well, if I can't take the crown, I will have to take you! [grabs the Queen and escapes through the chimney]

Kitty

[flying over; to Dudley through her wrist-com] Dudley, the Chameleon's got the Queen! [The Chameleon turns himself into a British taxi with the Queen inside and drives away] Where are you?

Dudley

[still in prison tower] Over here.

[on-screen] It is I, Larry, leader of Genius Larry's Order of Mayhem, otherwise known as: "G.L.O.O.M."

Dudley

No offense, but "Larry's" not a very scary name.

Oh, all right. Then from now on, call me…Murray!

Chief

Okay, Murray, you've got our attention. Now, just tell us your diabolical plan, so we can arrest you go out for brunch.

Ah! But that's the twist. I'm not gonna tell you my diabolical plan. Murray, out!

[in a quarantine bubble with a red stuffy nose] That's some nose you've got, Agent Puppy. I can't smell a… [stutters] thing. I have such a… [stutters] bad cold, I've quarantined myself. [sneezes and gets mucus all over inside the bubble] That's the last time I lick a hand-rail at the hospital. [an alarm suddenly goes off] Uh-oh. I'm getting intel that the Stink Bug is on the loose!

Dudley

Who's the Stink Bug?

A diabolical bug villain who stinks, duh! It's right in his name. Because of his rancid smell, we drove him out of … [stutters] town.

Chief

Actually, we just told him to take a shower, but he made a big stink about it and left, vowing revenge!

Well, he's back, and he's robbing the Limburger… [stutters] Cheese Factory. [sneezes]

Dudley

This stinks! Now my classmates are going to think I'm a loser.

Chief

Well, with any luck, everyone in your class will be a loser, too.