George Hammond quotes from Stargate SG-1

Bra'tac

You are Hammond...(He gestures to his own head of Hammond's bald head) of Texas?

General Hammond

I am.

Bra'tac

Your warriors serve you well.

General Hammond

What are you doing, Colonel?

Col. O'Neill

Ah, I'm looking for the edges of a mask.

General Hammond

What?

Col. O'Neill

You're obviously not the real General Hammond.

General Hammond

Sit down, Colonel.

Col. O'Neill

I don't think so, bucko. The jig's up, we're on to ya.

General Hammond

What are you talking about?

Capt. Carter

We're still on P7J-989.

Col. O'Neill

Oh, you betcha. This is just a new game brought to you by our good friend [Pats Hammond on the head] the Keeper.

General Hammond

Maybourne has been given authorization to take Teal'c under surveillance of his medical team.

Col. O'Neill

General Hammond, request permission to beat the crap out of this man.

General Hammond

[Hears unusual sound of something hitting against the iris] What is that?

Col. O'Neill

Those are bugs sir! Big! Ugly bugs!

Well, believe it or not, we need your help, Dad.

Jacob

What? The Pentagon wants me to deliver a message to God when I get up there?

Not exactly.

Jacob

Well, I don't plan to see the other guy.

They were holding you prisoner, Colonel. Still are holding SG-3 and the rest of your team.

Capt. Carter

Only temporarily Sir. And they thought it was to protect us as much as them.

Col. O'Neill

...Yeah, I didn't buy that one myself, Sir.

Colonel, I need some documents hand delivered to the Groom Lake Facility.

Col. O'Neill

Are these documents sensitive enough to warrant a three-man team with a Jaffa escort, sir?

Absolutely.

General Hammond

There's nothing we can do to save them?

Col. O'Neill

They've had it, sir.

General Hammond

You know that for a fact, Colonel?

Col. O'Neill

No, sir, I don't. But have a look at Major Boyd's face. What does that tell you?

General Hammond

Very well. Disengage the Stargate.

Capt. Carter

Sir, by some fluke of Stargate technology, we are witnessing something that the laws of physics say we can't possibly witness.

Col. O'Neill

(angrily) We are witnessing good men dying in slow motion, Captain.

Capt. Carter

(embarrassed) You're right, sir.

General Hammond

Shut it down.

How did it go?

Teal'c

[in Col. O'Neill's body] It did not go well, Gen. Hammond.

Col. O'Neill

[in Teal'c's body, sarcastically] Ya think?

So this inaudible sound was making you sick, but not in the same way that it was affecting the aliens? They need the sound to live but we altered it by harming the organism that makes the sound?

Col. O'Neill

Sounds right.

[While examining the monitor blasted by "Mother"] Theories? Suggestions?

Capt. Carter

Seems obvious this Re'tu exists.

Col. O'Neill

Well, here's a question: How do we deal with an invisible threat?

Capt. Carter

We need a way to detect them.

Col. O'Neill

That would be helpful.

[After the teams return from the Re'tu planet] So you would say threat assessment is high... [Turns to O'Neill]

Col. O'Neill

Oh yeah.

Capt. Carter

There were a lot of them, sir.

Teal'c

They are indeed invisible.

Teal'c, I would like you to act as liaison to the Goa'uld. Dr. Jackson—

Teal'c

[interrupting] Gen. Hammond.

Is there a problem?

Teal'c

I mean no disrespect. But I have given my allegiance to you, to the SGC and to the people of this world, freely. I will, however, not see to the petty needs of these Goa'ulds.

Dr. Jackson

[to Hammond] I'll... see to the petty needs of the Goa'uld, sir.

[To O'Neill] What happened, Colonel?

[To Hammond] My Lord?

Col. O'Neill

Actually, we just call him…General Hammond.

Where is Apophis?

Col. O'Neill

He's not here. Sorry.

What have we got?

Liars! Traitors!

Easy, easy!

You will be punished! He will avenge me!

[to Jack] Who is this, sir?

Col. O'Neill

His name is Rogers. Despite appearances, he's not SGC.

I'd like to debrief ASAP, Colonel.

Col. O'Neill

Yes, my Lord.

Doctor, you're asking me to allow a known homicidal maniac to work with potentially lethal substances?

Dr. Fraiser

Yes sir. But with all due respect, Daniel may be right. Ke'ra may be an entirely different person than Linea, without the memories that made her the person she was.

Col. O'Neill

Scuse me, amnesia check? Destroyer. Of. Worlds.