Daniel Jackson quotes from Stargate SG-1

Maj. Carter

Were you this annoying when you were ascended?

Dr. Jackson

I dunno, depends on who you ask. I thought I had a certain je ne sais quoi. Timing was so-so.

Daniel Jackson

Hey! Have I told you my latest theory yet? It's really cool. Lose something?

Maj. Carter

Did you see a…

Daniel Jackson

Little girl?

Maj. Carter

Yeah.

Daniel Jackson

No.

Dr. Jackson

[regarding the SGC] Miss it?

Jonas

Yeah, I do.

Dr. Jackson

Well, judging from what you have to deal with back on Kelowna, I'm not surprised. I think I'd take life-threatening danger over one of those council meetings any day of the week.

Col. O'Neill

Daniel, their planet's going to explode!

Dr. Jackson

Jack.

Col. O'Neill

The whole damn planet!

Maj. Carter

Colonel!

Col. O'Neill

Carter.

Dr. Jackson

Coffee (Yawns)

Teal'c

Knowing your past experiences, Daniel Jackson, I do not know how you have slept well before now.

Dr. Jackson

Thank you, Teal'c. This conversation has been disturbing on many levels.

What is the, uh…what is the significance of that?

Dr. Jackson

It's fascinating.

It's fasc…Okay. [to his crew] Back up. Back up. [back to Daniel] Uh, that's it? It's "fascinating"? Then why were we running?

Dr. Jackson

Oh, uh, I just wanted to see if you'd chase me. [grins]

Col. O'Neill

No, no, no, wait. Don't hang up. I need a seven-letter word.

Dr. Jackson

I told Sam I wouldn't help you.

Col. O'Neill

Well then, this will be the one thing she doesn't know. "Up, Down, Charm"... Blank.

Dr. Jackson

"Strange."

Col. O'Neill

Yeah, well, thanks anyway.

Dr. Jackson

No, the word you're looking for is... [O'Neill hangs up]

Col. O'Neill

How long have you been standing there?

Dr. Jackson

You said half an hour an hour ago.

Maj. Carter

General Hammond is waiting for us.

Maj. Carter

The fate of the universe is hanging in the balance and you've been sitting in your truck finishing this?

Col. O'Neill

I believe the bet was double or nothing. [SG1 begins walking up the stairs towards the briefing room]

Maj. Carter

Okay, 23 across, "the atomic weight of boron." The answer is ten.

Col. O'Neill

So?

Maj. Carter

You wrote "fat."

Col. O'Neill

Your point?

Daniel Jackson

[Describing the particulars of the Ancient device] Except for it wasn't meant for a physiology as primitive as ours.

Col. O'Neill

Easy fella ...

Daniel Jackson

Sorry.

Col. O'Neill

[Sitting on the ground] You know we've searched this place up and down...

Daniel Jackson

I know.

Col. O'Neill

We could have Goa'uld on our collective asses any minute now...

Daniel Jackson

I know....According to the text on this column, it's inside.

Col. O'Neill

[Sarcastically] Inside you say. Well let me tell you my friend. There is no inside. There's just a whole lot of [Hands pointing out for dramatic effect] outside.

Maj. Carter

Sir? [Sits down next to him on the sofa]

Col. O'Neill

[After a long pause of her just staring at him] What?

Maj. Carter

I should have done it.

Col. O'Neill

What? Stuck your head in that thing? Are you nuts? Carter. You're one of this country's natural resources. If not National treasures. It couldn't have gone down any other way. I just hope it's worth it...

Maj. Carter

Even if we do find the Lost City. Even if we get there and find exactly what we're looking for to defend the planet....

Col. O'Neill

[Interrupts her] THAT ... would be worth it. [Jack and Sam stare at each other until a knock at the door interrupts their moment]

Daniel Jackson

[Opens the front door and pops his head in] Hello!?

Col. O'Neill

[Sam smiles in disappointment. Jack sideways glances at her before calling out to Daniel and Teal'c] In here!

Daniel Jackson

[He and Teal’c slowly walk in the door. They peer around the corner ans see Sam and Jack sitting close] Oh sorry, are we interrupting anything?

[Dismissively] No...

Col. O'Neill

What are you doing here?

Daniel Jackson

Oh we ... well it's ... it's a funny story actually. We, we, ah, were driving by and we, uh ... saw Sam's car in the driveway, and ... and ... uh ...

Col. O'Neill

[Nudging Sam's arm, sarcastically] Funny.

Daniel Jackson

... Teal'c said to me. Well he didn't actually say anything. He just kinda looked at me and did that eyebrow raise thing that he kinda does and I said to him, I said 'hey, why don't we stop by and'...

Col. O'Neill

[Interrupts Daniel] Is that doughnuts?

Teal'c

[Holds up the box, beaming] Indeed!

Col. O'Neill

[a la Monty Burns] Excellent!

Col. O'Neill

You are so wrong. It's a perfect analogy: Burns as Goa'uld.

Teal'c

They are merely animated characters, O'Neill.

Col. O'Neill

You are so shallow.

Dr. Jackson

Oh, Please! Teal'c's like one of the deepest people I know. He's so deep. [to Teal'c] Come-come on, tell 'em how deep you are. [to O'Neill, excitedly] You'll be lucky if you understand this.

Teal'c

My depth is immaterial to this conversation.

Dr. Jackson

Oooo! Y'see!

Col. O'Neill

No more beer for you.

Maj. Carter

I'm sorry, sir, but I have to agree. I don't see the connection.

Col. O'Neill

All right, that does it. You know, the entire VHS collection was going to one of you. It's going to Siler. He gets it.

Dr. Jackson

I remember when we were first trying to get the Stargate to work, I would come here and just stare at it for hours.

Is that a gentle reminder that you've been an important part of this since the very beginning?

Dr. Jackson

Subtle, huh?

I've been awake all weekend. The reality of this is…it's an adrenaline rush.

Dr. Jackson

Hey, at least I know you have a beating heart!

Dr. Jackson

This is Dr. Elizabeth Weir. She's the new leader of this facility.

Hello.

Bra'tac

Has Hammond of Texas fallen in battle?

Oh, no sir, he's fine!