[South Park Community Center, evening; Randy is on stage with Mr. Mackey, Principal Victoria, The Mayor and her aides; Much of the town is in the audience]
Okay, people, I kno- I know. But, he will get the other celebrities to withdraw their lawsuit if we just... get Muhammad to appear in South Park.
Are you nuts?! If Muhammad appears in South Park, we get bombed!
We don't know that! Maybe enough time has passed.
[to Token] Dude, I can't believe we are dealing with this Muhammad thing again.
But even if it were safe now for Muhammad to come, huh, how would we ever find him?
Yeah, showing an image of him is completely off-limits and censored. So nobody has ever seen what Muhammad looks like.
I saw him once.
[The audience turns to Stan]
You did?
Yeah. A while ago my friends joined David Blaine's cult. I had to go to the Super Best Friends to rescue them. Muhammad was one of the Super Best Friends.
Oh, and what? And he was just out in the open where everyone could see him and nobody got bombed?!
No, dude, it was totally flying.
Muhammad showed up and there was no violence at all.
Well this giant John Wilkes Booth shot Abraham Lincoln.
Alright, Stan, that's enough. Jesus, can't learn to shut up, can you? [to the audience] Now look, I believe we CAN find Muhammad. I've done a lot of research and I've completed a sketch of what Muhammad could look like today.
[stands up] No, don't!
[Randy pulls out a sheet of paper from a manila envelope and turns it around: it's a stick figure with a round head]
Is that okay to show? [sits down]
I don't know. I guess we'll see.
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