South Park · Season 2, Episode 1
Since the last South Park, you've waited four long weeks to find out who the father of Eric Cartman is. Now, finally, the shocking truth about Cartman's lineage… will not be seen Tonight, so that we can bring you the following special presentation.
[Terrance farts]
Terrance, you farted in court.
Yes Phillip, I'm making a case for our defense.
Terrance, you may be a famous surgeon, but you're not God! J'accuse, Terrance!
Would you like a 'Monkey Claw', Phillip?
Yes please. [Terrance farts]
That's called the 'Monkey Claw', because it feels like my colon is being ripped apart by a thousand monkeys.
The 'Monkey Claw' is smelly.
I hate you, and I wish you both had cancer!
Cancer?
Yes, in the head!
Head cancer?
This is not the end, Terrance and Phillip! You'll rue this day!
Scott really hates us, Phillip.
Yes, perhaps he's homophobic.
...But we're not gay, Phillip.
We're not?
I hate you more than ever, Terrance and Phillip! I absolutely abhor you both! [starts waving his arms in front of them; pause]
What are you doing, Scott?
I'm wishing cancer upon you!
Cancer?!
That's right! I'm trying to give you cancer with my mind!
[hides behind Phillip] Ugh! Stop that!
Hey, Don't give me cancer!
What are you idiots doing?
We're looking for treasure.
Is that some kind of metaphor for a kind of search that can't be described?
No, we're searching for treasure.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's South Park pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
